Advice on Winning Over a Freelance Escort – My Answer
I always think Stickman is a little harsh on these girls but I will tell you what I think, based on a marriage of several years with an ex go-go dancer, bearing in mind from my very limited experience that I think most Thai girls from the provinces are the same.
I don't think you need to do too much to win over a Thai lady, show you have money and she is yours. Many Thai women seem to think they are over the hill at 30 so if over 30 if she can marry a farang she will be very happy.
My wife has openly admitted to me that she went to Pattaya to find a farang and it took her only a couple of months before she met me and she wasn't too psychologically damaged by the experience. I can tell you that most women in Thailand are always thinking of that option if their current relationship goes bad. They see the Thai women with farang husbands have plenty of money and they want some of that as well. My wife in the 2 months she was in Pattaya had had another farang wanting to marry her, not sure why she chose me and not him, probably I had more money.
I know of an approx 70-year old (at least she looks that age) who is often joking about going down to Pattaya to find a farang. I get constant requests to find farang for various women in the extended family. I know of an 19 year-old, a 22 year-old with child, both wanting a farang, the 19 year-old is a bar girl but the 22 year-old has never been near a bar.
My wife tells me that her mother wanted a very large sin sot, hundreds of thousands of baht, but my wife tells me she didn't want to scare me off so settled on an almost modest 100,000 sin sot.
Once married, expect your wife to change. She will want a house, a car, a house for her parents, loans to various siblings which you will be lucky to be repaid. Then there will be requests for gold so she can show off to her friends and to the staff in shops, banks etc that she has hit the big time. My wife has risen from a nobody to she is now almost friends with the gold shop owner and is renting land from them, getting reduced loan rates because she is married to a farang. My wife’s family were almost untouchables as they had reneged on loans in the past. No-one would give them loans from the local bank as it requires several villagers to guarantee your loan, now she is married to me she can get loans no problem. We now have two cars in our family, not many families have 2 car households so she is Top Bitch.
Then she will want money to buy land, irrigate it and constant get rich schemes such as raising pigs, chickens, ducks, buffalo next month it will be something else.
Expect to be lied to constantly. My wife tells me these stories she wants money for and I later find out it isn't true or she has twisted the truth to make it more palatable to me. Most Thais are gamblers, so expect her to go off gambling on cards and the lottery. <This is absolute nonsense and while it may have some truths with a certain subset, to suggest "most Thais" are like that is hyperbole – Stick>
In the village where I live, one lady was married to the postman. He did not have enough money so she went off to Pattaya and now has a farang husband who is retired and she seems to live reasonably modestly on her land cultivating it. Her husband has bought her a nice house and she works the land.
Another lady has a farang husband and lives in Farangland. Her sister lives in her husband's house and he has invested in digging some ponds and they are going to breed fish.
Expect money to constantly drain out to help father, mother, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, cousins and even friends. Expect loans never to be repaid.
Once married, expect to have to pay off various loans that she is defaulting on and also loans where she has acted as guarantor and banks / finance companies are wanting their money back.
Expect to have to buy new tyres, insurance, servicing costs for your relatives cars which they have bought but can't afford to maintain.
Expect relatives to borrow tools and any useful item in your house and never return them.
Finally expect great SEX to keep you happy and to keep you from straying. They get very protective about their husbands, and they don't want to see the money stream dry up.
So if you can put up with all nonsense above then go for it. If you will get mad by all of the above do as Stick says and do not think about this lady any more and RUN.
I feel that you make the classic mistake that many who get involved with a bargirl do – believing that the crap you put up with is the same crap that most guys involved with Thai women put up with – and that that is just the way things are. With those who never were a bargirl (the vast majority of Thai women), things aren't like this! They are SO much better! The difference between a good woman and a bad woman is night and day! One cannot deny that in Thailand, like all countries, there are good women and bad women everywhere and it's not only the bar industry where bad women are found – but for sure, if one chooses to marry a lady they met in a bar they should take a long time to get to know her to make sure she will make a good wife.
A lot of the stuff you talk of sounds like marital hell. The reason I recommend guys take the time to get to know their life prospective partner is so that they avoid exactly the sort of wife / situation you talk of.