Readers' Submissions

A Life Of Sanuk

  • Written by Anonymous
  • November 23rd, 2012
  • 5 min read



Why would men travel half way across the world to a foreign country to engage with the locals and after finding out the locals are "different" to them freak out and accuse the locals of all sorts of indiscretions?! If you want a prom queen, stay in Hicksville and don't plunge into the plasma pool of South-East Asia!

I continue to be amazed by the number of contributors to Stickman who tell the same tale, from getting their head punched in to their girlfriend "cheating" on them. Are these people (a) dumb (b) racist (c) imperialists or (d) just damaged? Am I alone in loving the madhouse factor of South-East Asia, the ever present joy of not having a clue what is happening! I seek it, I love it, I hope it never goes away and I hope all the freaked-out farangs of the 'they done me wrong' crowd return home and warn their pussy friends to stay away! Why do they want to make the world in their image? What if honesty, integrity, virtue etc are just concepts your society has given air and aren't worth much elsewhere? I offer a tale of the superficial life I lead when in Thailand, a life of sanuk, and a true love of the fact that the world is still new.

A beautiful night on Sukhumvit it was and I had launched the glass canoe some 8 hours before so my face was hot and my ears were ringing. And that's when I saw her. Five foot nothing, Isaan features and some of the biggest tits I had ever seen – talk about top heavy! She was buying some crap at a stall and I waited until she walked off and followed. I drew alongside and said hello. She spoke very little English, worked in a restaurant and had just knocked off and was heading home.

The love affair started that night with the usual dinners, Pattaya weekends etc. She didn't fit the bargirl mould yet was a little too savvy to be straight off a farm. She could pull a cab in pouring rain from the third lane when there were no cabs to be had and she used to put three fingers alongside a glass when ordering whiskey.

One night after a drunken argument I decided to move hotels and rid myself of her.

About a week later I get a call to my new hotel room. It is her wanting to come up (Isaan radar). I said OK.

In she came, dressed in full after 5 with the hair up covered in jewellery with the bust pushed out so that her necklace was horizontal. She was as pissed as. She told me I was easy to find and then raped me, the session ended with her yelling at my member, "Wake up, wake up!"

I said let's go for a drink. As she was dressed up, she got a cab and we went to a bar at Huay Kwang way on her direction. In the bar were her friends. I could not help but notice they were all stacked, stacked like a Busty mag at a newsstand. Drinks and food flowed and they were a good lot. And when the "boyfriends" arrived I noticed all the girls (including mine ) could speak Japanese. Yes, I had stumbled into the big tit soapy massage Nippon set. The Jap blokes wouldn't even acknowledge me and I felt it was time to leave. The Yen was flowing as I made back to Sukhumvit alone. I guess she'll hunt me down again. Sukhumvit it was, and the glass canoe had been launched some hours before when I saw the most impossibly long legs…

So I guess where I'm heading with my "tales of sanuk" is that you need to go native to a degree to enjoy Thailand. Did it matter that the tale of working in the restaurant was false? No, not in Thailand. Did it matter that she spoke Japanese and never told me or even alluded to it? No, not in Thailand. Did it matter that when I got annoyed with her I just changed hotels without so much as a explanation? No, I was just avoiding confrontation. Did it matter that the Japs were rude to me and my girl wiped me like an arse when they showed? No, because I had zero invested in her and the Japs. Once you start to live like a Thai it is easier to understand the Thais.

Thailand is unique in that it was never colonised by Europeans and as such has avoided the gallows and church steeple, the two instruments which control not only the oppressed but also the Western mind. Too many Farangs want to order the Thai people, to break their primitive certainty. It may very well happen anyway but you should be vigilant in not joining the crusade of righteousness. You want straight, unbroken pavement to walk on, go back to Farangland!

No doubt many Stickman readers will be unable to change their ways and this is evidenced but the shear anger felt by many when they perceive they have been lied to. Lied to! Really! I also notice when drinking around Bangkok an imbalance towards right wing views in bars. In fact during the recent Presidential election I could not unearth a Democrat. There is a strong scientific engineering group from the west that is assisting Thailand on its path to the new, but the imbalance in intellectual debate has given the local conversation a sterile sameness. The only dissenting voice is often the religious or the hand wringers and the motives here are not clear. An accident of history has given us Thailand, we should treasure it and hope the days of sanuk continue.



Stickman's thoughts:

I understand where you're coming from and what you say is fair when looked at from the perspective of a visitor. From the perspective of someone who not just lives in Thailand but has uprooted their entire life in Farangland and invested heavily in Thailand, I think they have a right to comment on issues where improvements would benefit all.