What Does It Take To Be A Successful Expat In Thailand?

As one who has never even been to Thailand I hear so many conflicting stories about the place.

I'd only consider going if I thought I could make a successful permanent relocation. Otherwise why spend so much money, take so much time off work and go through all the hassles of getting over there?

So my questions are as follows:

1. For Stick and all those WHO DID FIND A GOOD WOMAN: HOW THE HECK DID YOU DO IT???!! If Thai are all supposed to be so damned dishonest how did you find a good one?
2. What keeps you in Thailand?
3. What is the typical profile of a "successful" expat i.e. age, race, education, job, mental and physical make up, etc.,. etc.?
4. How does one go about finding long term stability in Thailand?
5. How does one find good friends there?
6. How does one find good health, dental and mental health care?
7. How does one create financial security?
8. How do you retire there?
9. How do you stay in the country without getting kicked out?
10. How do you get away from it all? (I live in Los Angeles and I simply drive my car from 15 to 30 minutes and I am in nature).
11. What are the pros and cons of car ownership?
12. Where are the best places to live if you are single AND still need to work AND find a girl?
13. How do you deal with all the negatives?
14. What sort of careers work best?
15. What about Thailand is better than where you came from? What is worse?
16. What are the general pros and cons of living in Thailand?
17. Is it safe to visit any of the countries near Thailand?
18. How well do you know the Thai language?
19. How do you feel safe there?
20. How do you find peace of mind there?
21. How do you get away into nature there?
22. How do you deal with being in a totally different culture i.e. race, religion, language, climate, continent, position in relation to the equator, bacteria, music, art, philosophy, values, laws, police, government, politics, education, judicial system, military, business practices, ethics, morality, lack of feminism, gender roles, medical care, dental care, health care in general, human rights, animal welfare, safety, laws, legal system, etc., etc.?
23. Where do you live in Thailand and why?
24. Do you plan to die there as an old man i.e. close out your life there? Why or why not?
25. What caused you to visit Thailand for the first time and what decisions went into you moving there for good?
26. Do you feel more or less lonely since moving to Thailand? Why?
27. Do you have more or less of a sense of community since moving to Thailand? Why?
28. How do you make a real connection to your Thai girl since they usually don't speak English and vice versa?
29. How do you deal with a population that is generally poor, uneducated and lacks shame or morals?
30. Aren't you just seen as AN ATM machine to the Thais?
31. Do you have good Thai male friends?
32. How do you deal with all the uncertainty? Lack of safety? Poverty? Weird expats? Scams? Dishonesty? Food? Quality of life?
33. What makes Thai women better than Western women? Worse?

This is a bona fide reader submission NOT AN ATTACK 🙂

Thanks !