Lamentations Of An Old Bastard
In 2014, ten years ago, I married for the third time, despite having previously sworn I would never marry again. Haha!
Why? Because I had fallen in love with a beautiful Thai woman whom I believed would be my wife until I died.
Eight wonderful years passed and I was blissfully part of a small Thai family living in Bangkok.
Though I was unaware of it, my health was deteriorating during this eighth year, due to what was later to be the cause of two heart attacks (myocardial infarctions).
Looking back, I think this may have been a trigger factor in what was to ensue in late 2022 and early 2023.
Late 2022 my wife says that I am too old (75) and that she wants a younger farang husband of around 40 – 45, preferably rich. WTF!
This announcement absolutely floored me, as it came out of the blue, though looking back there were indicators during 2022 which I passed off as relationship changes.
I managed to keep my composure to be a “modern” mature man and be balanced and non-emotional despite the seething rage below the surface.
So, I said, okay go find a younger farang, fuck his brains out, and hook him into your net.
My intent was that she would struggle to find a new, younger farang easily and even if successful it would probably fail given a year’s time needed to build a true relationship.
Thus she intended to go to the full moon party on Koh Phangnan early 2023. I thought good luck with that, it’s a drug-induced rave on an island which attracts young studs from abroad looking for crazy times, sex, booze and drugs on the beach under the full moon.
I said great, go for it, fully expecting her to come back tired, no boyfriend, just a sore pussy from banging too much, after which she might review her options.
Anyway she goes to Koh Phangnan but I find she is going with her old boyfriend from when she was 18, who had been chasing her for some months, supposedly as a friend.
That was the first mistake.
She said she was never going to have another Thai boyfriend or husband only a farang. Well, blow me down, a full moon party full of farangs, but she goes with an old boyfriend who has been divorced twice and has at least three children by different ex-wives / girlfriends.
At this point I decided I was leaving the marriage.
I stayed on for a month after the full moon because her daughter was seriously ill and relapsed and was dying in hospital. She died in March.
A day or so later, I had not seen or heard from my wife but one of the staff in her mum’s shop asked me why I wasn’t at the temple.
He took me there immediately to find my wife with her boyfriend and her dead daughter going through the family farewell process of pouring water on the deceased’s hand and saying goodbye before they put her in the “coffin” in which she would later be cremated.
This single event broke my heart. How could my wife not tell me to come? I was stepfather to this girl and “daddy” to her young daughter whom we had reared for nearly eight years, as the now dead daughter was incapable of motherhood.
I decided to leave the day after the cremation, so I went to Jomtien and found accommodation near the beach. I went back to Bangkok to get my stuff and moved to Pattaya / Jomtien where I live still today.
This episode caused me great stress and a few months later I was struck down by my first heart attack.
Nine months later in March 2024 I have a second heart attack. This time the remaining suspect arteries to my heart appear all clear, according to the doctors. Now I have two stents and fortunately no damage to the heart itself and a month later, writing this, I feel like a new person health-wise.
Amazing how hidden plaque build-up can cause low level illness which I suffered for two years leading up to these events but now that is the past.
Come early 2024, my wife says she is leaving her boyfriend and wants me to help her financially! The fool I am, still feeling “love” for her, I help. This additional financial stress must have triggered the second heart attack, I am guessing.
I am glad it happened because apart from taking some drugs for the rest of my life I feel quite youthful despite being 76.
At any rate, there are several factors that stress me financially which I won’t discuss here other than, at 76 I was unable to get medical insurance, thus I am saddled with a 500K baht hospital debt. This changed what was a comfortable lifestyle here at the beach to one of having to be a Cheap Charlie in order to repay the debt and live frugally.
Thus, I have told my wife (we are not divorced yet) that the next payment is the last she will ever get from me and I need to focus on my life as a single elder from now on.
Bye-bye, Bangkok, it was good while it lasted but like all things in life that has come to an end.
The author of this article can be contacted at : vanlaar.luke@gmail.com
