Readers' Submissions

Not A Lot Of People Know That!

  • Written by Kloth
  • March 27th, 2020
  • 6 min read

It’s Michael Caine’s catchphrase and goes along with the Cockney accent he’s proudly kept through all these years. As a young man I once crossed his path fortuitously in a London West End Theater. Starting with the 1966 film Alfie I must have seen most of his many movies that followed. Today’s post is of an event that fits into this category. Just replace the word people with Thai girls!

Dear John: Thai ladies have likely never heard of or seen a Dear John letter, let alone written one. Thus, having no idea or comprehension of the meaning of it. In their often capricious or smoke & mirror view of days in life passing by it wouldn’t make much sense anyway. They come and go, do or don’t do things at their own whim. Irrelevant if they are from the good girl or bargirl variety. My view of things. Or rather it was my view. Until I received a Dear John letter about a month ago. That’s what it looked like:


Yes, I know, we live in the internet and smartphone age and no Thai girl is going to take pen and paper to explain her feelings. In this case the message came on the Line app. A half-packed suitcase plus the bare text. No, not the stuff of epic poetry. In the end it said the same. I admit it took me some time to comprehend the content of the message and to realize that I was told it’s over. There was only one decent way to reply and that’s wish her the best of luck.

It’s what I did a few days later.

What happened? I met Ann (assumed name) 2½ years ago. A sweet and gentle X years old. I keep her age to myself as I’m probably old enough to be her granddad She had a job then as a sales assistant in a small shop in the banlieues of the capital. Commuted every day to lodgings with another girl to somewhere even further out of town.

The wages of course were negligible and nowhere near enough for rooming, food, transport, clothing plus the contribution to the family as it is expected when Thai girls of poor families reach the age to be in gainful employment. One of her friends in a similar position easily found employment in the sex industry. No, said Ann, she could not not would ever do that. She told me after I got to know her a bit better. Did she ever have a boyfriend, I asked? Oh yes, she answered, two, but they were both of the Thai man no good variety. One thing led to another and I became her sponsor. Or sugar daddy if you prefer as I’m not a young man any longer.

It’s a lesson I’ve learned some time ago. Paying for carnal or simply romantic human bonding is a far more satisfactory solution. Especially here in Thailand, and at my age. As it turns out the feeling was mutual as the relationship lasted. In one of our more in depth talks Ann confided that marriage, children, family was not for her. A very untypical Thai attitude I know but I believe her as she does have some very free-spirited and profound ideas for a Thai girl.

In time we established a sort of non-obligatory routine. We’d meet at my local condo, spend time together. Often ended the encounter going to a nearby restaurant or I did some of my own creations being a bit of a hobby cook. She even asked once for that cheesy stuff where you dip pieces of bread in (Fondue). But then did not enjoy it as expected, the taste of wine put her off. Can you make Chocolate Fondue next time, she said!

Ann was able to rent another room now for herself and closer to a new working place downtown where she secured a position in a more upscale outlet selling designer jeans. Along the way also some ground rules, again totally unsolicited, were established. Like Ann never stayed overnight at my place. Often well past midnight, and BTS closed she would return to her lodging by taxi.

The usually once a week meeting thus did not allow any lassitude to creep into the relation but increased desire, at least in my case. I disliked the now fashionable torn jeans she wore on our first encounter. Never saw any of those again. With the new monthly budget, she now was able to show up weekly in new, sexy outfits she knew I liked. When I complimented her on her always narak presentation I was rewarded with that beautiful smile telling me that she bought the newest outfit at the local market for 100, 150 or 200 baht!

So what happened? I honestly don’t know. Has she caught herself a farang millionaire or more likely, simply another, younger Farang and perhaps more generous lover? Or fallen in love with a handsome young Thai lad? All is possible. Ann is now in her 25th year (oh well, it’s out now) and that’s sometimes a crossroads in people’s lives. But nothing is ever definitive or final in Thailand. I get the feeling that sooner or later Ann will be knocking on my door again. Not that I’m of an overconfident nature but my perhaps harsh analyze in the opening segment may not be all that wrong. We’ll see! Read on further down the page.


At this point, please allow me to give my opinion on the truly difficult time we’re all going through as a result of the now worldwide Corona virus. As of my writing, Thursday morning 26.03 an emergency decree has been implemented by the PM that will last until the end of April, Songkran postponed. As a farang in LOS and whether we like it or not there is no alternative but to accept the imposed rules and regulations. A stricter curfew may still follow we are told.

On my submissions I almost always get some feedback. I’m happy to say that they’re almost always positive. On my last sub one person observed differently. His opinion was that “digging up old stories from 20 years ago or more” was totally displaced in the current situation. Out duty was to concentrate on the worldwide pandemic.

I have a different view. First, I’m not of the kind to paint the devil on the wall. Yes, the situation is serious. My belief is the more you can get away from the current unhappy times, the better. Take your mind off the corona virus. Get on with your life, try to forget the real threat to our existence.

People in active working situations are obviously distracted for many hours a day. In my case (retired) I try to fill out the day as best as I can. Examples: Adding an extra 30 minutes to my early morning swim at the condo where at 7 AM I get the pool all to myself. Walking to the 7 Eleven or Big-C instead of taking the moto taxi. Writing long overdue letters. Watching old movies that I like on DVD. Re-reading books out of my library that I liked years ago. Or download more recent editions on the Kindle app. And yes, when I’m in the mood to do so I will continue to pen the occasional sub to Stickman. Incidentally today’s story is not from the past for once. In fact, it couldn’t be more contemporary.


That takes me back to Ann. Turns out that my assessment of young Thai girls in the opening segment was not all that wrong. Perhaps premature. They are perhaps best described as farfelu. Sorry it’s a French word. You can look it up but will find no accurate translation of the deep meaning of the term. Perhaps eccentric or cranky describes it best. Ann is back in town after some weeks at home. She made it known as usual on the Line app. Not surprisingly being the current situation followed by; “Sorry, I have no job and no money”.


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