Stickman Readers' Submissions March 13th, 2017

Never Trust A Bargirl From Surin

This is a true story.

Much has been written about Thai bargirls and how they are only after one thing – money! I did not heed the warnings. This is my story.

He Clinic Bangkok

I met her at Nana Plaza in 2015. She was pretty and she came over to speak to me. She appeared innocent. We played pool. I paid the barfine and we then had dinner.

She spent the week with me. We traveled around Bangkok. Her name was Ging (name changed).

As soon as I hopped in to the taxi for the airport, she Facebook messaged me saying she missed me!

CBD bangkok

I replied that she missed the money and not me.

Over the next 3 months she continued to call me daily on Facebook messenger.

I sent her some money as a gift ($100).

She said she wanted to stop being a bargirl and spend more time with her children. Her kids were being looked after by her parents in Surin. She said it was time to leave being a bar girl – too much alcohol and too much risk with strangers for sex.

wonderland clinic

Every month she would visit her children and parents. At the end of each visit (2 days) her mother would beg her not to go back to being a bargirl.

Our relationship continued by Facebook. She said she was leaving Bangkok and going home to Surin. She asked if I would help her.

I agreed to send her a monthly amount while I was living in Australia. Shortly after returning to Surin she got sick (she sent me photos in hospital). I paid for her hospital fee and I sent her flowers.

We would talk everyday sharing thoughts and photos. She was always with her 2 children.

We agreed to go to Chiang Mai for a holiday. We met at Bangkok airport, traveled to Chiang Mai and had a wonderful week together. She wanted gold jewelry which I purchased for her.

She said she needed braces and agreed I would help her and added this to the monthly amount I sent her.

We planned to go to Bali next. We met in Bali 10 weeks later. Again we had a good time together. I bought presents for her kids.

We agreed that I would go to Surin to visit her parents.

I went to Surin to meet her parents.

Her parents did not speak English but were genuine, hard-working farmers. I met the kids and they were great.

I saw where Ging was living (in a single room upstairs from her parents’ room). She was not living a life of luxury.

I gave her parents and her kids presents.

We talked about the future and she said she wanted to get married. We got engaged and went to Cambodia for a few days.

When we returned to Surin I met some of her friends and we looked at house and land options.

I went back home to Australia and I placed my home on the market.

I sold my car, shares and other items.

I sent her money for land. She bought land near her parents’ house.

We met again in Phuket for another week holiday. A great time was had again.

Our next meeting was planned for Surin to see the elephant festival and finalize the house.

Ging asked me if I would buy 2 iPhones and bring them to Bangkok. Her friend would meet me at the airport. I met her friend and gave her the phones. Ging told me not to talk about the cost of the iPhones. Later Ging told me she had added 5000 baht to the price – her profit, she said!

Ging was kicked out of home the week before I went to Surin. We had changed the builder for the house we were building (as it was cheaper but a similar size house).

Apparently her mother was getting a kickback from the original builder and when we changed builders she got angry and kicked her out of their home.

I arrived in Surin. I met her parents, her kids and gave them presents. We stayed at the Majestic Hotel.

Ging and I met the builder the first night and signed the papers.

I wanted a lawyer’s agreement as well. She showed me the papers (from the lawyer written in Thai). We both signed the forms.

We had a big ceremony for the commencement of building a new house. I met more of her family and they were nice people.

I also met another of her friends (Lek, name changed). She was in her early 40s and had been a bargirl for many years. She had returned to Surin as she had a boyfriend from Norway. She was going to visit her boyfriend and meet his family in Norway. She was going to stay 3 months in Norway.

Ging wanted to have another child. So we tried to make a baby.

8 weeks after I returned to Australia she told me she was pregnant. She showed me the test strip. Shortly afterwards she had a motorcycle accident. Luckily she was not seriously hurt. I was concerned about the baby. She agreed to do another test. She showed me a video of her doing the urine test. It was positive.

I sent her money for the house in regular payments. I also rented an apartment for her (as she had been kicked out of home).

Ging started asking for more money – for the fence, furniture, new iPhone, car etc. I said she had to wait until the house had been paid for before buying other items.

When the last house payment had been made Ging stopped talking to me. She was always busy with serious stuff when I contacted her. I kept on trying to communicate with her. Whenever I talked to her she was very angry and kept on saying she was busy. She said she had a debt of 300,000 baht for the new fence and school fees for her 2-year-old daughter. We had talked about sending her daughter to school but we had agreed it could wait. She would note elaborate on why she had spent money she did not have.

I had sold everything in Australia. I told her I was moving to Surin. She said not yet.

I got suspicious. I kept calling her and asking for photos. She said she was busy working at a Bangkok restaurant. She said she had big debts and had borrowed money from friends. I asked how much debt? She said 400,000 baht. Eventually she sent me a photo of her (top half only). When I asked if she was bargirl she said no. She said I was stupid for asking as she was pregnant. When I pressured her more she said that she did not want to be my boyfriend anymore. She was a bar girl and not pregnant.

I was angry.

I contacted her friends and asked them about Ging not talking to me (once the house had been paid for). They did not reply. Ging contacted me and told me to stop talking to her friends.

The next day she contacted me and said that she wanted to go away with me – but I would have to pay long time every day. I asked her about us again. She stated ‘what about it?’. She would not tell me where she was working or what area.

I visited Bangkok and took the agreement to a lawyer. He said the agreement was not for the house and land.

Lessons learned

Do not trust a bargirl.

Bargirls will say and do anything for money.

Bargirls will lie if it involves money.

Bargirls will lie and cheat her family and her friends if it involves money.

Bargirls will falsify pregnancy tests (I guess they use a friends).

Lawyer agreements need to be in English.

Luckily for me I had not lost everything, except my pride.

She made an error though. If she had waited she could have got more money out of me!

I was burnt and trodden on by a Surin Bar Girl

Stick‘s thoughts:

That’s another in a very long line of sad stories.  I know it can be easy to fall for these ladies but I think you made a significant error when you signed a document in Thai.  Whenever you are asked to sign a legal document it’s wise to get a legal opinion, especially so when in a foreign country and that document is in another language.

nana plaza