Stickman Readers' Submissions June 18th, 2014

Burned by a Woman from Isaan

I am one who has been burned by a woman from Isaan quite recently. I have to blame myself for being taken in by her and it happened for two main reasons: the first being that I wanted to retire here and the second being that I thought I could improve the life of someone else.

I knew she was lying a lot and I knew there was a strong desire for money. At no stage did she ever save me any money on anything, instead she and some members of her family made everything more expensive in the most roundabout ways. It took 4 years for me to work out what was really going on but I have finally woken up to the realization that it could never work. It cost me a lot of money because we nearly got married and the expense of all that including lawyers to get a prenup, and the unbelievable expense of a Thai traditional wedding set me back about $9,000 Australian.

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The last part of that expense occurred because when I decided I couldn’t marry her at the last moment she warned me that, knowing my passport details, her brother would see to it that I could not leave the country. Her brother is a government official with many friends in the Police. I doubted their capacity to do this and my lawyer in Bangkok said I could keep the sin sod of 200,000 baht if I pulled out. Unfortunately I had given her half the sin sod already.

I decided to pull out because I realised about $1,000 AUD was missing from my wallet and I accused her of theft, which she denied. Then she changed her mind and said she’d only taken $200. Later her brother opened his wallet in front of me and I saw a $50 AUD banknote in there. I asked him how he came by it and he said his friend gave it to him. I asked my fiancé how her brother came by an Australian $50 note and she said she’d given it to him 2 years ago! I packed my bags and left, but not with ease!

We went to the Police in Buriram to sort it out and there she manipulated a policeman to confiscate my passport unless I paid her compensation. They charged me with “failing to get married and causing embarrassment” and said if I paid her 120,000 baht “this would all go away”. As all this was conducted in Thai. I didn’t know what persuasion was brought to bear on the policeman but he wasn’t taking any money himself. I offered 60,000 baht, probably too much and she and her brother behaved like they had won the lottery.

I saw the real truth about her at that time. She had gloated that I would be going to Gaol(Jail). She was venomous, merciless and manipulative, a liar and a thief.

When I thought about it I realised she was not a normal, balanced person. She was a sociopath. She has no sense of remorse and never learns. Whilst Thai people I met shortly afterward seemed somewhat sympathetic to her, they also saw me as the victim. This is because Thais are tolerant of all forms of behaviour. I met some very decent Thai people, including some members of her family so I believe they are as normal as anyone else.

But she is different. She gives an air of vulnerability and uses charm to get her way. She actually manipulates everyone to some extent. One in every 25 people is a sociopath and given the circumstances that prevail, I believe there is a perfect setup for “rich” Farang to encounter devious women. The women seek out the men who think it is their lucky day. That is why there is a common thread here. Of course, not all Isaan women are the same. Many are quite reasonable but when cashed up Farang are in the presence of a needy local there is a perfect opportunity in which a sociopath can operate.

For a sociopath to succeed, they need a victim and the victim must have certain character traits to make them vulnerable, just as a bully needs a weak person to intimidate. Some kind of weakness has to be apparent for a sociopath to succeed.

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As an addendum, I am reporting this incident to the Tourist Police so hopefully some record of her activities can be established.

It is wrong to suggest there is stupidity involved here. It is also wrong to suggest there is a scam involved. It is also wrong to say all women from Isaan are the same.

It is human nature that is at play here, human interaction. In my case I have learned a valuable life lesson. I have never been a victim of a sociopath before. The woman concerned has not learned anything. She is incapable of learning because she is a sociopath. She has no feelings for others.

's thoughts:

How / where did you meet her? What is the background?

That trumped up charge at the police station sounds like a nonsense unless other stuff happened that you have not revealed.

Where I do disagree is where you say there was no stupidity involved. Yes, you may be a victim, but it seems some bad decisions were made to get to the point you ended up at.

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