I’m Over It
I have said it before and I will say it again – no wonder Stick wants out! Even though he turns out an awesome op-ed piece every Sunday without fail, the readers' submissions like Bangkok apparently are in serious decline. I will admit I was addicted to readers' submissions to the point I enjoyed them more than Stick's column itself (sorry Stick). Most of the time these days I am lucky if I even read one all the way through. Not only is the general quality fairly ordinary, (as evidenced by the unedited sub Stick placed last week) but the general tone is decidedly unpleasant as well. Basically now the majority of subs either bitch and moan, berate Thais and by extension Thailand itself, complain about the decline of the "scene" or an unpleasant combination of all 3. I was always told if you are not happy where you are then go somewhere else. The problem I think with most of the people submitting now is that like all of us, unfortunately wherever you go is where YOU are. Some of these miserable people wouldn't be happy if they won the lotto. Also the better sub writers don't contribute anymore – the Mega's and Dana's are all gone and our more enlightened writers like the Professor and Korski never really seem to bother anymore either. Has everybody seen the writing on the wall perhaps?
Now on with what could be my final rant for quite a while because even I am getting bored with saying the same shit all the time. IT IS OVER, OK? Get it? Thailand will never be the same again! The days of overweight, pisshead pensioners being able to walk around with a glamour on his arm, and being in a relationship with said beauty for a pittance are gone, finished, finito never to return again. I whole heartedly agree with Will's recent sub. If you as an older man, no matter whether think you are a good style of a bloke or not, or you keep your self fit or whatever B.S you wish to tell yourself….if you think you can come to Thailand, make no effort to learn the language, try and start a relationship with a bargirl who also can't speak your language who is 15 years or more your junior and not spend nearly the same amount of money weekly as you would in the West you are seriously deluded.
Now in the late 1990's I had many mates who were many years older than myself whose wives were drop dead gorgeous. Most of these guys had 20 years plus on their little darlings, many where overweight, ALL of them loved to drink more than is reasonably feasible and most of them had fxxx all money (or if they did their little darling wasn't getting much of it) and their idea of stylish fashion was exchanging their singlet for a polo shirt (occasionally) in the evenings and exchanging their flip flops for sneakers on REALLY special occasions. So what does all this mean? Not a lot really…
Seriously though, Thailand is still a wonderful country with some lovely people and if bars are your thing and you are persistent you will still find some fairly attractive girls that you can take home for a reasonable amount of money. That's it! That's as good as it gets. I wouldn't be looking for a relationship or a love affair with any of the girls presently working in Bangkok or Pattaya, not unless you have a substantial amount of money with which to keep her occupied. As many subs have said you are now better off getting online or going to the "normal" bars and clubs that are really starting to thrive around town. Beware though, anything Western now in Thailand (girls, food, alcohol etc.) price-wise is on par and even sometimes more expensive than it is at home. Aaaaaaah, rant finished!
Fear not however, Stickmanites, for as some of us realise every cloud has a silver lining. Last week a good mate of mine came to see me in Bangkok and I was then to return the favour to spend a week with him in his home country, Cambodia. So we catch up in Bangkok and even though I have met her before, let me tell you his wife is stunning. He has 15 years on me, he is 56. His wife of 12 months? Well, she is 21. I would rate her as a solid 8 so for him she is waaaaaay off the scale, maybe a 17! Now this is a good mate of mine and a lovely bloke but he has really hit the jackpot. Just even walking through Bangkok heads were-a-turning everywhere! She is that good looking. Honestly, it was starting to get embarrassing. Beside the fact she is young and beautiful, like most Cambodians her English is perfect (on par with the Philippines). She is humble, respectful, funny and loves my mate to death. It gets better though. How much does this princess require from my mate when he is not there? She said she is more than happy with $100 US a month! That's right, less than 3000 baht a month to keep Miss World happy! Obviously he gives her more than that so she, naturally, is ecstatic.
On to Cambodia. Well it's no Thailand but it is nice enough and if you are looking for cheap and you want something similar to a Thailand experience of 20 years ago that's where I'd be heading. As I have stated before, I have been to the "Phillo's" many times but it just doesn't grab me and Cambodia wasn't Thailand as I said, but if I had a choice of Cambodia or the Philippines it would be Cambodia all day. A few price comparisons between Cambodia and Thailand for those of you on a budget. Beer 50 cents. A girl "long time" and I mean all night $15 US. A litre bottle of Absolute coincidentally costs you the same price. Now I can't be bothered dicking around with the U.S. conversion rate but in Aussie dollars that is @400 baht for a girl all night or a bottle of Vodka. Both will come in at less than a thousand baht. For me that is a win : win all round. The cheapest I have ever seen Absolute in Thailand was 1000 baht and in a bar upwards of 2000 and we all know what girls cost now in the Kingdom so I won't harp on it.
So to wrap it up, instead of whingeing, do what the early Thailand explorers did and stick and move. If something isn't good go find something that is but as I have stated before, many coming to Thailand now haven't got the substance of those who travelled here in days gone by. They need everything handed to them and force fed and haven't got the "ticker" to go and find a new experience of their own. To the old warriors though that still have means and the ability to travel and have become disillusioned with the Kingdom, jump on the next plane to Phnom Penh. I promise you will have a ball and maybe find some of the old magic again. If you are an old warrior you didn't need me to tell you that, did you? You would already be out there doing it by yourself which is how we all used to do it anyway.
Thanks for your time.
Certainly there are many guys who have enjoyed good times in Bangkok who are looking further afield and Phnom Penh, along with Angeles City, are the two places that many seem to be heading for.
As far as the quality of the subs go, while some of the old favourites may not contribute any more, there are new guys like Steve Rosse who contribute articles every bit as good as some of the old names. Quite a few readers have commented about the submissions being sent in. It can be very frustrating for me when someone complains that the quality is down on what it was in 2005, indicating they have been reading for many years – yet they have never sent even one article in. It would be nice if each reader just sent in one submission per year. I don't think it's too much to ask.