Stickman Readers' Submissions December 17th, 2011

Amazed At How Men Fall In Love With Bargirls

I don’t profess to be an expert on Thailand. In fact, the closest I’ve been to visiting Thailand is perusing Stickman’s website and trawling through many YouTube videos, delighting in the tales of adventure and overwhelming sights
of beauty. Before I go any further however, I must profess that my interest in Thailand is piqued due to my girlfriend of 2 years, whom is Thai (I may pen some submissions in relation to her at a later date).

Having read so many entries from readers across the globe, I do find it somewhat amazing how men have fallen into the bargirl trap; namely falling in love with them.

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Like I said, I’m no expert on Thailand, but then I don’t believe I need to be an expert to realise how amazing this phenomenon is. I’m not here to cast judgement on anyone who has made their own decisions in life. People
should be commended for making independent decisions that they believe in.

But I do find it incredible that some men, fully grown and very experienced, actually believe in love with a bargirl. This seems to be more the case with the older generation (shall we say 45 and above?)

I know how it feels like being alone. I’ve gone through periods without a girlfriend, or worse, with a broken heart. It’s lonely, and often you crave female attention. I’m fairly young (30) and can’t begin to imagine
what it may feel like being older and perhaps in (or out of) a failed marriage, trapped in a loveless marriage, or just being on your own for many years, craving female attention. As men, we have a basic need. We all want companionship. Someone
to be affectionate with. Someone to share life with.

So perhaps it’s not so much a surprise then that these older, experienced men allow themselves to fall into the lure of a bargirl. When you’ve been starved of attention, of love, then I’m sure the sight of many (beautiful)
girls fawning over you is a major boost and exactly what you crave. Suddenly you have attention again, and you feel like you mean something to someone.
And when you’ve been lonely for a while, you allow yourself to believe anything
is possible. You want to think that what she says (“I love you”) is true….how can it not be?

But let’s take a step back here. Firstly, as soon as money is exchanged, even just the once, you become a customer. Nothing more, nothing less. You are a number to them. They are providing a service and you are paying for it. In their
eyes, the men are just desperate customers. A lot of them will think that the men are desperate no-hopers who can’t get a girlfriend in their homeland.

Secondly, do we believe a girl (especially one worth her salt) is going to respect someone whom they know frequents these types of places on a regular basis? I don’t mean to imply these guys shouldn’t be respected. But I find
it hard to believe a bargirl will ever have respect for a “customer”. And I doubt she’d consider him life partner material.

In her mind, it’s acceptable what she does as this is just a job for her. Probably this is a means to an end (not in all cases, I know…but in the majority). That’s how they justify it. They are earning a living for their family,
etc. They aren’t doing it for the thrill of sex. But for the bloke, it’s a lifestyle choice. He isn’t doing it to get paid.

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For her, in her mind, he probably lacks the morals she wants from a life partner. It’s an assumption that most people would have, rightly or wrongly.

And who can blame them? I know I wouldn’t want to be with a girl who frequented such places. Would you?

If the guys took it for what it was – quick, cheap, not committed fun, it wouldn’t be a problem. But to fall in love with a girl from the bars and to declare your love for her is nothing short of madness. And then to commit
finances towards this bargirl in the hope that “she is the one”? What the hell is going on?!

I know being lonely can drive people to carry out desperate acts, but a lot of these men are educated and experienced guys. Yet all common sense flies out of the window.

Under what world would you actually trust a working girl? Their mind-set, priorities and objectives are far, far different to you and me.

On top of all this, some of the men feel they have been hard done by when their teeruk reveals her true colours, and reveals she has many men on the go and milking them all dry with grand promises of a brighter future together. What would
you expect! They don’t work in a bar looking for love. They work to get paid. But the men I refer to go to bars hoping to find love – it’s a car crash waiting to happen.

I truly find it amazing how experienced guys get caught up in this web. And by reading a lot of the stories here, I can’t believe how much crap they also put up with the bargirls!

I know it’s been said to death, but please, if anyone is searching for love, or a partner, don’t search for it in the bars. Nothing good can come of it. Use the senses God has blessed you with and stay smart. Don’t be
taken for a ride. You’re worth a lot more than getting played around and taken for a fool by bargirls.


Stickman's thoughts:

Loneliness is indeed a big factor and it is amazing what this emotion can cause some guys to do!

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