Readers' Submissions

Thai Thoughts and Anecdotes Part 289

  • Written by Dana
  • May 14th, 2011
  • 4 min read


Attn: Worldy people and uber hip Stickmanites:

Beaglehole? Beaglehole? Ok, here is the thing. I can not be insensitive or uncaring regarding names in other cultures. Just not in me. In fact, if I can be allowed to speculate; if it was a contest (being insensitive to names in other cultures), I could not enter. Just not in me. But Beaglehole? The mind wanders.

Bailey Beaglehole?
Barney Beaglehole?
Barron Beaglehole? And if the child Barron grew up to lead a life of distinction: Sir Barron Beaglehole?

And let us not forget a sentence like: Mr. and Mrs. Beaglehole and all of their little Beagleholes just got back from a trip to France.

Beau Beaglehole? Beau sounds like a hopeful name for a baby still sticky with birth fluid. But Beau Beaglehole? Names like Barney and Billy should not excite comment but Barney Beaglehole? What kind of hell is this kid going to have to endure in school? And how about his twin brother Billy?

And girls? Babs Beaglehole? Barb Beaglehole? Bethany sounds like a nice name for a girl. But Bethany Beaglehole? And of course let us not forget the woman's special problem–assuming a man's name when you marry. How sad for Babs Smythe to become Babs Beaglehole? Or, maybe not. Once again, I do not want to be judgemental or insensitive. Just not in me. But I'll tell you–if I ever decide to marry some Thai guy in a gay civil marriage in Bo Rai Cornhole Suckburi, I am not going to marry a rice planter's son named Beaglehole. We are going to have enough problems without trying to explain that one.

But that is not really what I want to talk about today. What I really want to talk about today is important to every man in the Kingdom and is titled:

TRANNY SHEEP — THE FINAL FRONTIER

Hello Stickmanbangkok. comites, Dana fans, and parole violaters. Are you like me? Of course you are. Everyone is like me. And so it follows as the night follows the day that you are an open minded lover. All that counts is giving and receiving love. Love is your watchword and your mantra. Combined with this is the sure and certain knowledge that all humans want to avoid pain and seek pleasure. A little pleasure? No, that would be silly. The maximum amount of pleasure.

So, how do we participate in a loving relationship and guarantee ourselves the maximum amount of pleasure? Three words: THAILAND and TRANNY and SHEEP. THAILAND — TRANNY — SHEEP. That's right: Tranny Sheep — The Final Frontier. Mark the day and the date and the time that you read this. Your love life has changed. That's right fellow pants droppers–nothing will make you smile like drilling Thailand tranny sheep. I know a lot of tourists to the Kingdom, ex-pats, and mongers are happy walking down the boardwalk in Pattaya with a cute Thai sheep trotting next to them–and I don't find fault with that. It's just that there can be more–so much more under that wool fellas. Believe me when I tell you–I know. Some of these Thai tranny sheep are packin' if you get my meaning.

Why just play 'wheelbarrow' in the ocean facing sixth floor suite at the A. A. Hotel on the corner of Soi 13/0 and Beach Road in Pattaya when you can play 'wheelbarrow' and 'reach around' at the same time. Be all you can be. So, with that in mind; I am going to write a monograph in the coming weeks that will tell you all you need to know about Thai tranny sheep and their farang lovers: techniques, what they like to hear you say in the middle of the night, where to buy hats with holes in them for their ears, medications for wool allergies, use of shin guards to protect against sharp hooves, sheep's wool shearing techniques, wet wool shower games, etc. Be all you can be. Be me. Make this the year that you graduate from heterosexual sheep to tranny sheep. Tranny Sheep –The Final Frontier.

Note: a male sheep is called a ram. Hey, works for me. Got a tranny sheep in your life? Then ewe are one lucky guy. It'll be rammin' time tonight. Don't you just love it when a plan comes together?

So, in the coming weeks I am going to post on this website a 50,000 word article on farang – tranny sheep relationships. I know what you are thinking. Hey, it's just the way I am. I'm a giver. It's all about the love. Anyway, in the meantime if you have any questions or contributions regarding this subject just send them to:

Dana Enterprises
c/o TSP-BAYCB (Tranny Sheep Project–Be All You Can Be) Dept.

Who loves ya baby?
Dana Does–Baaaaa

P. S — Ya know one of the beautiful things about having a transvestite sheep for a lover? Who can tell? Ok, I kinda mentioned that before but it bears repeating. I mean with all that wool your lover could be smuggling a fifteen inch wing wang and nobody can tell. With regular trannies few of them can pass 100%. The Adam's apple, or the voice, or the hands, or the feet often give them away. Not with sheep. Tranny sheep can pass 100% of the time. People will think you and your sheep are just two normal lovers. You knew that.


Stickman's thoughts:

No-one does Dana like Dana.