I thought I'd like to share a post I made on another forum recently. In light of Stick's latest column, I think it's relevant. I feel it is a good reminder to newbies and those that feel that they may be falling in love with a bargirl. My post is a response to a question asked, names have been changed to protect the guilty.
Originally Posted by Anon
Hi, I have been in Bangkok last month for the first time I my life (40 years), I had a great time with gogo girls met in Soi Cowboy, one in particular, a beautiful 24 year old Isaan girl from Tilac.
She was absolutely fantastic in bed, stunning body, sweet, GFE, very funny and she even tidy up my messy room on the next day!
I spent with her the last two days before going back to Europe, now we call each other twice a week (she even called me on my mobile one day), we write e-mails daily, she is keep saying she wants me to take her away to Europe, is that normal?
I honestly don't know if this is a troll or not, but I'll take the post at face value and try to give an honest answer.
Well, it's not abnormal and it happens quite a lot that a bargirl (bg) will keep in contact with you once you leave Thailand. There is generally only one reason why she wants to stay in contact with you, you've got money and she wants it!
The scenario can play out in many ways, here are some to mull over:
1) She wants to stay on your radar in case you come back to Thailand, hoping that you will use her "services" again and often. Why is that you may ask? It's because she wants your money. To be honest, I have some regulars who email me, I have a mongering email address, once in awhile to say hi and to stay on my radar, they haven't asked for $$, as yet. I think they know better. I actually find their emails quite amusing and harmless.
2) Now this scenario is a little more serious. Eventually, you may get requests for money due to some emergency, her baby/parents are sick and she needs cash to get them medicine or medical care. It could be anything really, work is slow and she needs help with her rent, blah, blah, blah. She will most likely add that if you care about her you will send her the money. Don't believe a word of it, she is lying. Why would she lie, you ask? It's because she wants your money!
3) She may soon tell you that she loves you and that she doesn't want to go with any other man, Thai or Farang, and that she wants to leave the bar and go home to her village and that she will wait for you. Then she will say, "Teerak, if I leave the bar, I will not have enough money to live and take care of me, my baby and my family so you will have to send me money (insert amount here) every month. She may not be so eloquent, but you get my drift. Believe me, if you start sending her money here is what will really happen, she will not go back to her village, she will stay in BKK and keep on working at the gogos. She will probably leave Tilac and move to another gogo, just in case you send friends to Tilac to check if she is there. Most of the money will go to her Thai boyfriend. Remember she is lying, because she wants your money!
4) Now here is the big one, the holy grail of bg's. She is hoping that you have believed her lies and are now convinced that she loves you. You have fallen for scenarios #2 & #3. You believe that you are both in love, maybe you've even made some trips back to Thailand to visit her. She's taken you to her village and you've met her family, etc, etc. Everything is great! What is the holy grail of bg's you ask? It is that you will marry her, so then she can really get down to business and milk you like a buffalo for every penny that you have. There are many ways she can do this, some of these are: 1) She will convince you to buy land in Thailand and then to build a beautiful house on that land, in her name of course, because remember you are not Thai and you cannot own land in Thailand; 2) Request a ridiculous amount of sin sot (dowry) to be paid to her family before you can get married, I suggest you look up sin sot by the way; 3) Move back to your homeland with you and after she gets her residency or citizenship there, she may accuse you of abuse and soak you in the divorce. These are but a few of the ways she may get your money, I encourage other members here to post some others for our friends edification. Remember, she is lying, because she wants your money!
Ok, I admit that I have been a little harsh here and that in fact some marriages to bargirls do work out. Stickman, wrote a column about bg marriages today, as a matter of fact. I am being harsh here because our friend seems so clueless and needs a wake up call! I suggest that he read Private Dancer and then do some research here and on some other sites as well. Anon, best of luck to you and remember she is lying because she wants your money!!!!
Anyway, who cares, he's probably a troll!
Lots of good advice.