Stickman Readers' Submissions August 26th, 2010

Korski – Do ya feel lucky Punk?

My, what a mischievous repudiation and misinterpretation of my earlier piece, “Urban Myths and Other Indisputable Facts” submitted by Korski in “
Small Japanese Penises and Mean Koreans: Indisputable Facts, Not Urban Myths”!

I do appreciate that many of Korski’s excellent submissions are fictional, “
Ratbag Trouble” being a case in point. I freely admit to sometimes indulging the same vice. This was certainly true of “
The Id”. Some readers may have assumed that “
Romeo and Juliet” was also a figment of my imagination! In Urban Myths; the “Dirty Arab” put down by my older brother together with my visit to the Grace Hotel Coffee Shop are factual. The final element of this story was pure fiction, which I chose to represent as a dream. For the observant amongst you, I included a couple of clues pointing you in the right direction. The first clue is that I was relaxing on my hotel bed with jetlag and dozed off. The second clue is in the location; a newly built beer bar on the ground floor of the Nana Plaza. Readers of Stick’s weekly column will identify with this currently being an empty building lot. Finally there was the Chameleon bargirl who continually changed her physical appearance. In the case of the bargirl, I will accept this may have had something to do with whatever Judge Korski or indeed the author himself was smoking at the time!

In Small Japanese Penises; Korski concludes that I am unable to accept the veracity of generalisations (Urban Myths). Specifically that the average Japanese mans’ penis is smaller than that of his Westerner counterpart and also that many Korean Mongers’ routinely mistreat bargirls. In apparently questioning Korski’s view, my position is contrary to compelling evidence supporting these statements as being generally true. Korski then expands on his conclusion by stating that my world view is shaped by a tendency to identify with the exception to the rule, which I then illustrate to challenge the validity of the norm. He justifies this by implying that my opinion is somehow tainted through being married to a Thai woman who is not an ex-prostitute. Korski correctly states that many Thai women residing in England are indeed former prostitutes. He believes that when a builder or street vendor mistakenly assumes we met in a Go-Go bar, that this burns the two of us “like metal cutting acid”. More on this latter!

In penning my light hearted response, I did not take a view on whether or not
Ratbag Trouble was a fictional piece, but made an assumption that it reflected Korski’s actual views on how Korean Mongers’ should be treated based on his use of the first person within the narrative. I note that Korski confirms my assumption was correct in the final paragraph of Small Japanese Penises!

My point was not to challenge the veracity of these urban myths, both of which I accept, but to highlight the risk of applying these generalisations when judging individuals who fall within the category to which the urban myth relates. Whereas the average Japanese penis will be between 3 and 4 inches when fully erect, I’m sure Korski will concede that some Japanese men are likely to have been blessed with a considerably larger member, irrespective of which mathematical model was used to determine the average. In Urban Myths, Mr Yamota does not challenge the generalisation, but simply states that he personally exceeds the average measurement. Given this part of my submission was a fictional dream sequence; it would have been difficult for me to have verified his claim, even assuming I was minded to challenge it.

Korean and indeed Arabic Mongers’ do have a bad reputation for mistreating bargirls. I am happy to accept Korski’s observation that the Philippines are the location of choice for significant numbers of Korean sex tourists. However, I find it difficult to believe that Thailand is a Korean Monger free zone!

In Ratbag Trouble and Small Japanese Penises, Korski advocates a position whereby it is acceptable to “kick the shit” out of any Korean Monger, due to repeated incidents of unacceptable behaviour demonstrated by this group in Angeles City. I don’t doubt that a number of these individuals do deserve a sound thrashing. An option no doubt supported by both Korski and the Texan Hanging Judge Roy Bean in equal measure. Setting aside the arguments against public lynching and summary justice, in certain selected cases I can see some merit in adopting such an approach – step forward Clint Eastwood as Dirty Harry. Where I have a real problem with this modus operandi, is when it is applied to any Korean Monger, irrespective of whether or not he is guilty of being a total scumbag. Indeed there would no requirement to gather, present and test evidence against the accused individual since collective guilt (i.e. the urban myth) has already been established. To my mind this is not only unjust, but also demonstrates the type of racial bigotry epitomised by my fascist skinhead (the Council for the Prosecution) – so enter stage left the gentle and kindly Korean defendant Mr Kim from Urban Myths whose unjust conviction ably illustrates my point.

I believe my statement in a previous submission about being married to a Thai woman who is not an ex-prostitute is another red herring thrown up by Korski to muddy the waters. My purpose in mentioning it was to clarify my perspective and circumstances as the author, nothing more. It is true that my wife does not take kindly to being mistaken for a whore – who would? For the record, she does not object to the P2P scene per se. Rather she finds the dress, demeanour and behaviour of bargirls to be course and low class, and for these reasons would prefer not to associate with them.

From my perspective, any incorrect assumptions made by people who don’t know us are immaterial and like water off a ducks back. I believe that bargirls’ provide a useful service and from an anthropologist’s point of view find their behaviour and relationships fascinating. On first visiting Thailand I viewed them as being transparent and rather two-dimensional; dismissing them as venal, vacuous and venereal. Following further visits to Thailand, becoming an avid Stickman reader, and having met people enjoying both long and short term relationships with the girls, I have come to realise that their lives are rather more complex and interesting than I first thought. Although on the one hand taking responsibility for their lives and those of their families through learning the basics of one or more foreign languages and adapting themselves to meet the varying needs of their customers in a way that enables the girl to extract the maximum financial benefit, in other ways bargirls remain undisciplined and almost childlike (e.g. reading comic books, sulking and throwing tantrums).

Despite being unacceptable behaviour in my view, I appreciate that the tantrums can be directed towards gaining financial advantage. How many girls have secured the latest Nokia mobile phone from their Teerek (at a cost in excess of 25,000 Baht), after first having thrown a tantrum when it was not immediately forthcoming? This exactly mirrors the behaviour of small children at the supermarket checkout when they spot the sweets neatly stacked on the shelves by the tills. On being challenged by a screaming toddler, many weak willed parents just give way and buy the sweets to appease the naughty child. Conversely, some adults maintain their resolve and say “No”, where necessary delivering a well earned slap to a leg or bottom to reinforce the message. It would be interesting to hear whether any Stickman readers’ have tried this approach, not just scummy Koreans’, in order to control a misbehaving bargirl. If so, then did they achieve a positive outcome? My, now that would be controversial!

To end with a mischievous conclusion of my own; I think Korski should be very careful what he wishes for. One of his alter ego’s (allegedly) – A Half Chinese Girl, presents a confrontational view (to some) that Mongers’ are “
Loser’s”. Although A Half Chinese Girl accepts that men have the right to participate in the P2P scene, there are plenty of feminists out there with both legal and, or political influence who do not – Harriet Harman, acting leader of the UK Labour Party for one. Korski himself describes the welcome home he received from US Immigration after a protracted visit to Southeast Asia in “
My Enduring Love Affair with U.S. Customs”. Ok, so they were on the lookout for Paedophiles, right? But Mongers’ – well all Paedophiles are Mongers’, so therefore all Monger’s must be Paedophiles? Simple – case closed! This reminds me of a definition of so called women’s logic, “All grass is green, therefore all green things are grass.” Is there a pattern emerging here? Remember also that prostitution in Thailand is technically illegal! So how long before Somchai the Thai policeman invents a new scam to tax Khun Farang, or worse?

So Korski, You've got to ask yourself one question. “Do I feel lucky?” Well, do ya punk?”

– Clint Eastwood as Dirty Harry.

Take care out there.

Stickman's thoughts:

There have been some submissions recently which were more suited to private email as opposed to a public submission. For any readers who wish to take issue with a submission writer, please keep it to private email. If you want to address the issues, this is the place for that. If you wish to challenge a person, do it privately. Think of it like a game of soccer – it's ok to attack the ball, but not the player.

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