Thanks You To Jayson And The Thai Points Of View
The current spate of articles that have arisen has given me with a lot to ponder. Now I am not the typical Farang as I believe I listen, take criticism and learn from others' mistakes. It does however irritate me that a number of my so-called Western friends have spoiled it for the rest of us. I have lived abroad, been born abroad and lived with a number of foreigners from all around the world so guess you could say I am different.
I thought I would write in as I am planning my first trip to Thailand, but my little experience of Japan has proved useful. The comments made by Jayson and Mixed Guy I totally agree with. In the West do you ever see good looking girls with tourists only here for a couple of weeks? Plus have you ever seen a really hot girl in the West with anything but their own race? It just doesn’t happen, the same way as Jayson and Mixed Guy have mentioned.
I have seen Western girls with foreigners but only when they have been working, living and speaking the language of that country. This is not in the norm and just as it is in Thailand maybe frowned upon or even socially unacceptable.
In the West, the general attire of jeans, T-shirts and trainers will never tempt a truly wonderful woman of note. So how do Westerners think that this will differ anywhere else in the world?
Have you ever seen a group of people from the same culture in a different place? They will always gravitate to what they know first. For example, 2 British families on holiday will always start up conversation as they know that there is something in common.
From evidence I have read and seen, Asia does not receive the best from the West, and I believe that this may give it a slightly warped view. As in this can be said for the other way round that West does not see the best of Asia.
Farangs aren’t the answer to Asian women prayers and a lot of Westerners will never learn or understand this. They think they can visit rule and conquer which is probably why we get such a bad reputation.
The point about communication is key in any relationship, be it a mixed marriage, a same race marriage, heck even a gay partnership. Without communication be it verbally or non verbal, there is no understanding and it is like a ship at sea without an anchor.
Stick has mentioned about Westerners going to Asia and behaving in a completely different way to how they would at home. In the West if a woman asked a man to pay for her car loan they would say no – so how come these farang in Asia are saying yes?!
If a Westerner was approached by a bar girl (hooker) in the West and asked for money, again they would say No so why do they do it in Asia? The answers to these questions I do not know and probably never will.
The point about a foreigner speaking the local language is vital. If a British woman was to date a man who couldn’t speak English then how would that be perceived and how would it work?
Thai women being similar to Western woman in so many ways I totally agree with, as I believe that woman the world over are all the same. To be cherished, looked after, loved, be secure and fulfilled is any woman's dream. If you don’t listen to your woman, value your woman and cherish your woman you will lose her, no matter where you are in the world.
What I do see as different and at completely a different end of the scale is what Western men and Thai men find attractive. I and a number of my friends find dark skinned Thai women attractive. Now I know this is associated with unskilled labourers as it was in the West many years ago. But some of the dark skinned girls have been to university, are educated and good people. From reading the submissions I see that many Thai guys find light skinned women attractive. Surely there are enough of both to go around.
With regards to where a person comes from, my parents came from a very poor area of the West and didn’t have a lot of money by Western standards. However they were good people, hard working people who worked sometimes 2 jobs and studied to better themselves. So anything can be achieved if people actually want and it doesn’t matter what race you are. From my readings, the North of Thailand has universities so there may be a number of people trying to better themselves.
I would like to thank the submission writers that have caused a reaction as hopefully it has opened some eyes, and knocked a few truths home. It certainly had an impact on me. There is good and bad in every race no matter where you are in the world. There is also a lot in common as there is a lot that is different.
Each male should be the best he can be, work hard, strive to improve himself and be a good man. It is never truly a man that chooses a woman. It is always the woman who chooses the man.
A local business to me has a farang husband and a Thai wife, he speaks Thai she speaks English. Plus they both went to university and work extremely hard. They are happily in love you can tell the way they look at each other, the little things give away the bigger picture. They have to work hard at their relationship just as everybody else does. Life ain't easy, pal, but you can put the odds in your favour.
I am now to prepare for my trip to Thailand, to see the culture, to see the truly beautiful country it is. I am starting my Thai classes and will have my Thai phrasebook at hand. You will not see me in the haunts where most of the Westerners hang out (naughty scene) as they truly do not represent what the West is about. If only the nice Asia could see the nice West but again I don’t know if this will ever happen.
Whilst undertaking my travels, if one of these dark skinned women were to find me interesting then so be it, stranger things have happened. I am open minded and if she was university educated, respectful and had a good steady job then who knows what would happen. These are the qualities I seek in any woman from anywhere in the world. If however she was a bar girl, well, I don’t go with them back home so I wont be going with them anywhere else.
Take Care / do lae dtua eng duay na
Hope I got that right LOL
Full of common sense. I hope you have a great trip and bet it is the start of your love affair with Thailand.