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Stickman Readers' Submissions February 12th, 2009

John McCain and Falling in Love with Thai Bar Girls

Wait! Before you tune out of this article thinking it is about politics; please read on!

Why did John McCain pick Sarah Palin as his running mate for the last American presidential election? Even the reddest of my Republican friends couldn’t offer a good explanation. Most just shook their heads and said that at least she
was easy on the eyes. In their resignation maybe lies the answer. The story of McCain’s pick has been documented in a number of newspapers and it goes like this. McCain wanted to choose his friend Joe Lieberman but he was way too moderate
for the Republican right wing. A number of names were floated but all had major negatives of one sort or another. Then someone suggested Sarah Palin; a popular governor from Alaska, a rising star in right wing radio, and like my friends said,
easy on the eyes. McCain is a man who trusts his instincts so he wanted to vet Sarah himself. A meeting was arranged on McCain’s large ranch. They would meet outdoors in a beautiful glen and it would just be the two of them. After two hours
of discussion, McCain emerged with a big smile and said she was his candidate. How did a skeptical McCain suddenly change his mind? Was Palin that good of a candidate or interviewer? Or was something else at work here?

He Clinic Bangkok

Needless to say McCain was smitten, but why? He is a seasoned politician, a military hero, and has no history at all of being a monger of women. Clearly, there was something else at work in that beautiful glen and here it is:

Do pretty women inspire men to discount the future?

For those too busy to read it, this is a not some silly women’s magazine article about how sexist men can be. It is a legitimate scholarly work printed in The Royal Society. The article puts forward in a very convincing manner a theory
that men will forego long-term big payoffs for short-term small payoffs if they sense an opportunity for mating. Basically, in the presence of a female that the male would like to mate with, he will try use the short term gains to improve his
chances of copulation. What makes this finding really disturbing, for males that is, is that these delusional deductions are not being made in the rational area of the brain, but somewhere in the primordial area of consciousness that most of us
have little control over. I have often heard that men think with their little brothers, but to find out that money decisions are being made at a much more biological level is really disturbing. Poor John McCain; even at the advanced age of 72
and with a wealth of government experience behind him, he is only able to make a biological call when presented with the pretty face of Sarah Palin.

Now, back to Thailand. If this theory is correct, here’s how it would work. Farang man, experienced in life and business, proceeds confidently into the bars of Nana Plaza with his also confident mates. They have collectively made the
decision to “just have a good time”. Together they appear to be the stronger force when they sit down in front of a stage of petit, but very pretty, Thai bar girls. At first, their resolve is strong, as they laugh and shout at all
the activities in the bar. But soon, one of the petit maidens gets in close enough to touch one of the male victims or to allow him a sniff of perfume, and he is now no longer in control of his own destiny. Biological priorities, what a man is
designed to do in this world over all other things, takes over as he quickly calculates how much money is in his pocket or in his bank account. He is certainly not thinking about other possible investments of his money and how much of a return
he could get. Instead, there is only how much money he will need to seal the deal with the maiden. In his mind, there are no alarm bells going off as there would be for other perils, like a mean soi dog, yet the danger is no less real.

Now advance forward one week. He has seen this girl every night and now it is time to return to Farangland. She baits the hook with an “I want to be your only girlfriend” and “I just need a little money each month to
be a good girl.” Again, his normal business wheels in his mind are not moving, only the ones he cannot control. A quick calculation of his funds and 5 seconds later he agrees. He leaves her a nice wad of bills at the airport and 30 days
later he dutifully wires her the agreed sum. Even thousands of miles away, she is able to keep that copulating subconscious part of his brain in command with daily calls in which she coos in his ear. Another sucker is hooked while those of us
who do not have this part of our brain engaged, at least at this moment, look on in disbelief.

If you have taken the time to read the “pretty women” article, you will notice that when similar tests are done on women, i.e., when presented with handsome men do women lose their business sense, that women still retain their
full business faculties and are able to make rational decisions about money. This is an enormous advantage that women have over men when it comes to negotiations over money, status, or even vice presidential nominations. Poor John McCain never
had a chance.

For those of you who have not been victims of your biology, I applaud you. In fact, there are plenty of us who can walk into a bar full of very pretty, partially clad, Thai women dancing close to us, and leave without escort but fully erect
in our realization that these girls are something special. But that is only because I have another beautiful Thai woman at home who is already in complete control of my copulating subconscious.

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