Misunderstandings in LOS

I have been travelling to Thailand about two times a year since 2001.

On my first trip I had the good fortune to meet a Thai lady who is now a very good friend, no not between the sheets but a very pleasant companion who speaks understandable English and also introduced me to a number of ladies with
whom I had a very pleasant time. BTW I also know her 'partner' Je….with whom she runs a guesthouse and two bars in Suk Soi 22. (Stick knows where).

I have read the Stick site for many years and it has also helped me to avoid a lot of trouble and also expand my knowledge of the LOS. After meeting Stick personally, and after a couple of beers, I decided to write a little about
some amusing experiences in LOS.

First time in Thailand

I'm sitting in a bar in Sukhumvit, Soi 22, Queens Plaza. A lovely young lady to the right, another on the left. Both are trying to extract lady drinks from me. OK I am also considering
what amorous adventures I could have.

A very young lady behind the bar asks me for a cigarette. Being a gentleman, I cannot refuse but have to make the comment I thought that good girls don't smoke.

All of the girls in the bar start to laugh – they are just going crazy – I am the star. It's just a shame that I don't know why! I am English but have lived in Germany for 30 years. A couple of new expressions in English
(American) slang such as the multiple usage of the word smoking were unknown to me (then).

The young lady who asked for a cigarette is now working behind the bar in another bar. I call her my daughter and she calls me 'Papa'. We are good friends now.

The short time room

One evening my companion for the week decides that she would like to go somewhere else such as 'Country Road', 'Absolute 7' etc. We take a taxi to Asoke. Of course Asoke
is impassable at 21:00.

The little lady decides that we should go further with a motosai, my first time on this dreaded suicide instrument.

Just imagine a man of 6 feet 2 on a mini motor cycle and a Thai lady of about 45 kg riding sidesaddle behind. Each time the driver braked, I was convinced that our combined weight would force him over the handle bars. Driving between
cars, buses and taxis with maximum 2 microns between my knees and the adjacent vehicles, cutting in front of buses and being careful not to hit any side mirrors with my elbows took their toll on my nerves. As we arrive at our destination
I am a little wobbly in the mobility apparatus.

Thai lady takes the lead as she appears to require this adrenalin kick now and again. The funny thing is that she nearly pissed into her jeans in a Haunted House at an amusement park on the previous day! The little Thai lady leads
me gently to a large, very posh looking building where I pay 800 baht for the use of a room for two hours.

It may sound a bit cheap Charley but I am already wondering why I pay for a short time room when we have the hotel. Ok I'm thinking, maybe she wants a bit of change or is even a bit kinky (after the experience on the suicide
machine), so I pay for the room and a couple of drinks and we are shown the room.

The room is luxurious, with polster everywhere, large flat screen TV (for the pornos?) and appears to even have a wonderful sound system. Just one problem, I wasn't expecting this tour and don't have any party hats with
me. It's no big problem I think, and as the service guy brings our drinks I ask him discretely about a condom.

Thirty seconds later he reappears with a styropor cylinder and I start to get afraid that it's a leftover from Blackest Bart or one of his primeval friends. To cap it all off, he takes my beer bottle and sticks it into this object
and announces proudly, Now Sir has condom for beer! I have now given up all hope and decide that the lady appears to be clean so what the hell. I'm just starting to get amorous, the lady is also willing, and then there is a knock
on the door which slowly opens and the service guy hands us two silver vibrators.

OK I am not interested in such assistants, but the young lady takes one and starts to sing into it! I am entertained for the next hour with wonderful Japanese music.

Later I am so frustrated that I go to a well-known establishment between Sukhumvit sois 6 and 8. I see a notice outside stating "No Smoking" but I go in anyway.

By the fourth round (with four ladies) I am lead to an extra room three staircases up which is able to accommodate five pieces of carnal flesh.

Super experience – They even have an ASHTRAY in this hidden room. At last a bar were one can relax!