Readers' Submissions

When You Hear She’s Back At The Bar



Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok

No matter how changed you have become in 5 years away from western morality and sexual values, it's not fun… And since you had to cut off her money so the kitty doesn't hang around your door, what else can a poor girl do?

So she was the sweetest and best dancer at a Pattaya gogo and wouldn't leave you when you brought her back from a short-time some 15 months back… Even when told there's no more money tonight. This after several weeks of gawking and you thinking about how nice she might be but could never get that eye contact we western boys seem to require… No matter how many wonderfully different ways Thai women's faces and bodies appear, every once in a while one really stuns us old girl watchers.

Trying to be strong and sane in the beginning after a few other crashes and burns, you tell her to keep her job and you'll pay her when she comes by after work… After a few months the thoughts of improvements creep in and how about getting her an ID card, driver's license and motorbike so the moto taxi guys don't rip her off at 3 AM. Then perhaps a correspondence course to get her that high school education she lost fleeing her ya ba addicted father who kept trying to bone her at 12.

Everyone marveled at how sweet and cheerful this long legged stunner was and so I kept trying to make her study, apply a work ethic, etc.

Even Dana was impressed with her sweetness. She cooked him a meal and he begged her to let him know via emails how school was going. However people want to see him, he is a compassionate and kind man.

Then getting her a passport for a trip to Hong Kong, Anchor Wat and various trips to Bangkok. Well, over time when you are 62 and they are 21, you begin to wonder who is taking care of who?

The 3 different English language schools she couldn't tear herself away from playing solitaire on the cell phone from long enough to study. The 4 different job opportunities she alienated people in her feeble attempts at work.

So you buy her health insurance to help with the emergency room dramas and you find out she was loyal to you from other bar girls who will normally assassinate each other at the drop of a hat.

She always talked about how much she loved me, a term I find silly as I love everyone I know in some way. What she loved was the idea of some old boy taking care of her and her staying air-conditioned in 100 square meters up high looking out to Koh Larn.

The dreaded curse. When she starts a year into it with the temper flare ups, you evict her and she uses her athletic prowess to climb over a balcony divider on your 19th floor condo and hides in your place only to surprise you an hour after you've been back form an evening thinking you had escaped the madness.

Then that feint scratching at the door and you open to see her collapse from the sleeping pill overdose. You haul her off to the hospital only to be stuck with a 6,000 baht bill. They tell you they'll call the police if you don't pay…

And, topping it off, you come home 3 months after she's been in her own apartment you pay for and she's stalking you as you're bringing home a short-time. She then attacks you and these jungle girls are not weak. You subdue her and go down the elevator where the security guards happen to miraculously be awake and they hold her while you flee your own building.

Away you drive down second road and up behind you she closes fast and you decide ENOUGH and turn into the police stand at the corner there of Pattaya Klang and 2nd road.

So there we stand, her telling her story so fast in Thai I could get about every 8th word and the police eyeballing me with deepening concern. Then they ask me and I tell them no, she has not lived with me 3 years and I did not promise to marry her at any time and she was paid and that she is harassing me and I want her to stop doing things to hurt herself or other people.

They say, 'We believe you. Do you want her to go to jail?'

By the way, this is the second time I've witnessed the police backing the farang. This town is oriented towards us. It's up to us to survive the girls who come her for one reason. And the police are Thai and know what's happening. In both examples I've witnessed they were fair – not at all as I've feared from all the horror stories.

Again they ask. "Do you want her to spend the night in jail?"

I can't do that to her and she hops on that nice Mio I bought her and states it is the last night of her life! As I leave the police stand my only choice is to turn left and head towards beach road. And as I drive away I see, to my total lack of surprise, her walking between opposing traffic as if in some suicidal trance. It barely fazes this old cowboy. She's overplayed the hand.

By now, I've learned that all her actions are calculated to make me feel sorry for her, their number one card to play.

And to you younger experts who astonishingly know more about women than men who have outlived you 40 years and to whom you brag and will say "They fxxk me for free"! It's an exit trip they're after and a farang baby for that much sought after annuity and ticket to ride.

Short time is king unless you are blessed with some tools I was not given. It's either short time or that ever present possibility of becoming a Pattaya superman.

Even now she knows I will hear of her working there again. If I make any gesture of sympathy or awareness, I'm back in the smelly pile of grief.

Thai Dating, Singles and Personals

Stickman's thoughts:

The problem so many guys face when they get involved with a bargirl is not the hell they will endure in their time with her (it may not start right away but it will come, sooner or later), but the torture they when they eventually get rid of her and she will then DELIGHT in rubbing their face in the fact that she is back in the bar and doing all sorts of unmentionable things with anyone and everyone.

They can't be saved. Worry about saving yourself.

Yes, there are some good ones out there, but we're talking a high, high risk game…

It is pleasing to see that the cops had an open mind.