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Thai Thoughts And Anecdotes Part 76

  • Written by Dana
  • January 22nd, 2005
  • 8 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok

Thai Thoughts And Anecdotes #76


IT'S NICE TO MEET A MAN ONCE IN A WHILE

I have a neighbor that likes all things related to knitting. Knitting patterns, the history of knitting, knitting people and personalities, knitting chatrooms, and of course the activity of knitting. She has a collection of knitting needles from all over the world. She likes to go to faraway cities and countries and attend knitting conventions. She likes to meet like minded people and share stories and ideas. She is a happy, well adjusted human being who has found an activity and an interest that gives her life meaning and makes her happy. She has a scrapbook full of pictures of people she has met in her knitting activities and travels.

I have another friend who loves sailboats. This is one of the constant threads that has held his life together through thick and through thin. All things related to sailing are of interest to him. He travels the world when he can to attend marina shows and antique boat shows. He takes pictures of friends he has met. He corresponds on the internet with like minded people. When walking down a dock, or at a boat show, or in a harbor; if he sees a boat that he finds interesting in some way, he takes a picture. He has scrapbooks full of pictures of boats that he has seen and admired over the years. Taking the scrapbooks down and reviewing the pictures gives him a lot of pleasure. If you get him going, it is like a dike bursting; he will talk your head off about boats. He has an enthusiasm, an interest. He follows through. His life is richer and he is more interesting for the experience.

I have an acquaintance friend who likes the company of Asian women. He is willing to travel long distances to spend time with attractive, fun, Asian women. He likes them. He listens to them. When he is in their company his heart rate drops and his blood pressure goes down. He likes everything about the experience. He corresponds with many of the women he has met. He has made friends. Women he meets introduce him to their friends. He genuinely likes women and they can sense that so they introduce him to their friends. Good things happen to good people! Sometimes instead of renting a room in a hotel; he will rent a suite. He will then set up a photographer's studio. If women are interested he will take professional quality photos of them. They are all interested. He gives them the photos and the negatives. It's just for fun. After he has taken one or two women's photos it is like a tidal wave. Suddenly there are women knocking on his door 24 hours a day. They bring outfits, they bring friends and family and children, they bring money (he never charges). Women love to have their picture taken. They love to display themselves for men. Men love to be in the company of attractive women – it is nature. It is normal. Usually, after about 10 days, he has to pack up and move to another hotel. It is the only way to avoid all the attractive, normal, well-adjusted women who want to have their picture taken. Sometimes, with permission of course; he will have a particularly appealing picture copied in Pattaya on Walking Street and then have the painting shipped to his condo in Brazil. The woman almost always gives her permission. She is flattered. When my friend is not in a faraway place spending time with women of interest to him; you can sometimes find him on the internet talking to other like-minded men. These are conversations of enthusiasm and interest. If you ask him at the office what he did on his vacation, he will tell you. If he had sexual relations he might mention it. It is all part of the mix. He has scrapbooks and photo albums at home that detail his experiences. Taking the journals down from the shelf from time to time gives him pleasure.

What is the difference between these three people, these three personalities, these three a vocational lives? THERE ISN'T ANY DIFFERENCE. And yet; the happy, well-adjusted man who is listening to his hormonal and gender programming is branded a criminal or a sex tourist. His pictures of his women friends represent part of his life–part of his family–His intimate loving contacts with members of his own species. But this doesn't get any respect because unless a single man places himself at 100% risk and signs a lifetime contract (marriage); nothing he does or thinks or feels has any value. And the things he does think or does do or does feel are suspect. He is guilty until proven innocent. And he will never be proven innocent. Because society's notion is that a single man must be deficient in some way, maybe even a criminal. This thinking makes single men nothing but pawns or tools of society or of a single woman. I resent this. I reject this. This insults my intelligence. And because I don't bow my head and I don't buy into this, because I have a sense of self-worth and personal dignity that hasn't been neutered by the family value' people and the predatory single woman just looking for a husband so that she can have a culturally acceptable way to have 'her' baby, I am disliked. Not only is this unfair, it is also stupid and ignorant. If you pursue the thought of this man's critics to it's logical conclusion; someday it will be illegal and immoral to have sexual thoughts of any kind unless you are married. Well, I reject this as the future of our race and I reject criticism of this man's enthusiasm. I do not believe he needs defending. And I salute him. I like him. It is nice to meet a man once in a while!

If you want to tell me in your low register manly voice that you married the first woman that you had sex with–good luck to you. I hope you are happy the rest of your life cleaning up slop in your leased fish and chips shop and going home at night to your wife who is now shaped like a pear. Knowing that you are superior must carry a lot of compensating weight because you sure haven't got anything else. Just whisper one thing to me–where in the house are you hiding the girlie magazines? Well, Max from Manchester and Ollie from Oslo; you pretend not to respect me but I am making love to the girls in those magazines. Because I am such a manly man? No, because it is easy! There is no bigger fool than the fool who brags about fucking women. It's easy. Women throw sex at men like farmers throw corn to pigs. Sex is the basest currency. And you can't even do that. Have you ever noticed that it is the people with the least that are the most judgemental? They haven't got anything else. At your own lynching look down on the crowd. You will know two things. They are all better than you. They told you so. And they are all failures.

If I am flying home from BKK it is not unusual for the gentleman sitting next to me to ask me where I am coming from. If I answer that I was vacationing in Thailand, it is not unusual for him to ask me if I met any pretty girls. If I say "Yes, yes I did meet some pretty girls."; the next question is sometimes "How many pretty girls did I meet?" If I quote a double digit number I am almost always branded a sex tourist. Now he feels superior and he has a naughty story to tell at the office when he gets home to Edmonton or Dubai or Taipei. Well, he might be right. I might be a sex tourist. But he might also be completely wrong. It might be that I am not a sex tourist. I am just compelled by the circumstances of life to sift that much sand looking for a diamond. I was once seated next to a gentleman on a plane who offered the riveting personal narrative that he had just spent twenty six days in Kuala Lumpur playing golf eight hours per day. He spent twenty six days of his life chasing a little ball around eight hours a day and this imbecile is judging me? When exactly did I miss the memo or the meeting on all of this? When did dodging Malaysian snakes on the fourth fairway become more interesting and exciting than having a beautiful naked woman in your arms? And at what secret planetary meeting did the sexless and the nitwit receive the power to judge people who know what their genitalia are for? If your fat sexless companion is enough for you; then I am happy that you are happy. The world needs happy satisfied people. But I want more. I can still dream the dreams of youth and hormones and hope and my tail is still wagging. I shouldn't be mislabelled for it.

I'm a man. I am not a criminal. I'm a man. If you ever meet me I hope later you'll say: "It's nice to meet a man once in a while!"

Stickman's thoughts:

Good stuff and I personally agree with the point you make.