End Of Illusions – Ecstatic Dancing in The Town Of Sin – Pattaya – Part 1
First: solly, English me no good. I am no native speaker . I just want to contribute something to this side, cause I am (like many others) a (very) regular reader of Stickman's side – and I feel to do my duty…
Spent my last holidays in Pattaya — not for the first time. As usual, I took the bus from MoChit bus terminal to bring me to Pattaya. (seems to me, that many people don't know, there is a bus from there to Pattaya. First time I tried this way, I
asked a taxi driver for this bus – at MoChit !- and he told me, I had to go to Ekamai, of course with his help to drive me …. . I didn't believe him, and I was right: There is a bus every hour- and it is less time compared to the Ekamai
bus!!
To go from Don Muang airport to MoChit is always an adventure – cause I don't use a taxi. I take the bus(-es), and have always to ask the locals for the right bus and have the tension of not missing the right place to get out. But I like this adventure.
(Maybe my motto is: always choose the hard way). But it's really nice to take the bus. Normally I am the only farang in the bus, watching the normal people on their way from or to work. surrounded from giggling schoolgirls in their uniforms.
And the bus cashiers never forget to inform me, when I had to go out (when buying the ticket, I told her, where I want to go). Maybe I am the only farang, choosing this way to go to MoChit. Cause I ve never met someone else…
Arriving in Pattaya, I went directly to my now favourite hotel and got a room at the sixth floor- and no elevator ! And no warm water ! That's exactly where I want to stay ! Why ? There are only 6 rooms placed on the top of the building. So its quiet
!!! Every room has the door to the roof – its a big terrace with flower-plants and palms. You have a nice view
over Pattaya. Every day, I used to have a siesta in my chair at this terrace, reading my book- splendid isolation. And besides
– it's really cheap !! Sorry, I don't want to give my secret away which hotel it is. You have to understand: only six rooms … Just to give you an image: a small soi from second road, near soi 10.
Sorry, I know, you want to know the story of losing my illusions.
After giving my room the usual necessary cleaning up (hey -it's cheap !) and feeding the animal (me) with the first real Thai dinner (can you imagine, what I think about folks, spending their holidays in Thailand and eating farang food? Like YOU
do ?!) I start my first
tour to the bars (it's now about 7 pm). On my last holidays, I spent the whole time with one lady (beside some unremarkable sidesteps) and I had no problems with her all the time. That's unusual for
me. Unusual in my whole life! Spending three weeks with a woman without trouble! It were really just pleasant and relaxed holidays – I couldn't believe it … I did call her two times after that, but finished doing it… I hope you know the
right reasons why. I ve made my experiences long ago, paid for my lessons with the sweet Thai girls – but that's another story.
So no arrangements were made to meet again with this lady. OK, first I went to her bar, maybe she still works there. If not – no problem. There are so many fishes in the sea … She was not at her bar. I asked for her and was told NIM coming later. Ok
– I continued my bar strolling – no ploblem. She is not that important for me. And I don't want to look like a fool waiting for hours, if she has another man. Better don't take it too seriously! It's my first night in Thailand and
still 16 nights left, so no reason to hurry. – I have a date with a guy, whom I met on my flight – next chair – and he stays in a hotel just some houses away. Two hours later I am back at her bar. Big hallo – she: why no call me? Me: I tried but
don't get you. She: Solly, I change number. Me: Why don't YOU call me ? She: I no number you. Me: You didn't ask me for my number – I asked you but YOU don't ask me!
But what was really amazing for me in this moment ? My feelings ! In this moment, when I saw her again after about five months it hits me – I got this strong feelings – in a second. I was totally surprised from this feeling. I didn't expect it. In
these 5 month back home, I did only think about her some times. But now- at this moment when I saw her again – god – how do I like her – How much did I missed her ! I couldn't just talk. I asked her to go around the corner in a dark soi-
want to stay alone with her for a moment and hold her in my arms ( I SHY)…
I paid barfine and off we go – to another bar – I want to stay with her alone (away from her bar, her friends). I sit beside her, just looking at her and my eyes filled with tears. Yes, no shit, and I was even not drunken. Just feeling happy and overwhelmed
from these feelings…
Now you start to be worried about this poor guy – or think, just another one of these fools- UP TO YOU … Did this romance end in an horrible fiasco? No. Did I have the same relaxed holidays with her? No.
With these feelings, I couldn't be relaxed. Now I want more. Now I was vulnerable. My expectations grow …
Three days later: She : you change He : no, I am the same, YOU changed! Maybe I've changed. Why not ? She: last time you want b… b… one. Now you want b… b… all the time. He: cause I do like you very much. She : you change
Every night, I had to go to her bar to pay the bar fine. I don't like it. Yes I ve changed. I do like her too much. Every night I had to pay for my whore at the bar. It always reminds me of her status. I don't like this status. I know, I like
her too much – too much feelings for a whore. I am not relaxed. I know, there cant be a bright future for us two. I know, the more time I spent with her, the more I will get hurt. But when I don't barfine her anymore, what will happen? She
will go with someone else. I don't want to see this happen. I know, it will hurt me a lot. I don't want to be hurt – shit – what can I do ?
Stickman’s thoughts:
She love me too much!
