A Normal Guy Living In An Extreme City

Very soon I am going to be involved in a new 24 hour English language TV channel here in Pattaya which is in the planning stage at the moment.

Your website (and I presume your TV channel which I seldom see) covers all of the dreadful goings on down here from Westerners being ripped off, lovelorn Western guys jumping from condos, traffic accidents and underage sex arrests etc. Do you become desensitized to it all?

Absolutely! Everyday I receive stories about people dying, suicides. Don’t get me wrong, we also cover social news as well, believe it or not. <We both erupt in laughter.> In my capacity as a tourist police assistant I go
to fatalities. I also work with the British Embassy and inform them of any British nationals dying to ensure that the family in the UK are informed of the death as quickly as possible. Personally, I probably see about 3 dead bodies a week.

Ooooh!

In various states of decomposition.

That I couldn’t deal with.

I hope none of the Stickman readers ever get to deal with the smell of death. It is horrible. But now it doesn’t bother me.

Did it bother you before?

When I first started here in Thailand, yeah, I was really shocked when I saw a dead body and how a body can be so mutilated in a road accident or a suicide, but now, no problem.

It’s not a nice job!

Someone’s got to do it. I feel as though I offer a service to people back home in England as well as Australia, New Zealand, wherever. It sounds a bit morbid, but I think I am doing a good service.

You are and you should be proud. How much of the writing and the photography do you do yourself?

The writing of the articles I do all myself. Unless I am not there I have an understudy do it for me. I have a team of journalists who are out 24 hours a day and they do the filming for me. I receive a script in Thai which is translated into English and
then I rewrite it in English. I would not class myself as a journalist. I’m more a news writer.

Why is it that some of the reports, both on your website and in the local Pattaya press have all sorts of superfluous information? I mean, how many times have we heard "Captain Somchai Imnotcorrupt, 43 year old cop with 20 years experience was munching on his som tum purchased from vendor Ba Wee when he received a report from room 308, third floor of the such and such a hotel, 300 metres along Second Road that a farang had leapt to his death?" This is not exclusive to you, but does seem to be a Pattaya thing. Why is that?

There’s politics involved in being in the media in Pattaya. If I am writing an article involving police, readers might not care who the cop is but I need to put in some details to acknowledge which cop attended to the case. I have to keep a relationship
up with the police and local government. Sometimes I have to cover certain things which might not be newsworthy such as the opening of a house or a tam boon <merit making – Stick> ceremony
etc. It is not really newsworthy but I have to do it. There are important relationships that need to be kept.

To many guys you’re living the dream. You’ve got not just a job in Pattaya, but you’ve got your own company and media outlet. I dare say you’re actually one of the ten most influential farangs in this town. Is your life here a bed of roses?

Well that statement has shocked me <He does a double take and moves about, almost uncomfortably in his seat.> I’m very quiet, an introvert. I really am an introvert. I’m not one of these media guys who likes to sit
in an office and shake the mayor’s hand. I am a worker. I work in my company. I don’t have time go and brown nose cops and local politicians. I know them. I go out with them privately but I don’t put it on camera. Others might
but I don’t. I just try and do my work and stay low profile. I am not a show off. I am trying to make a living for myself. I am not a millionaire and anyone that says that I am making a fortune in this business would be wrong. I have a
quiet life and a nice girlfriend. A good night out is staying in with the girlfriend. I’m a normal guy living in an extreme city.

You know that I am on record as being somewhat cynical about the volunteer police. I understand that you’re a member. Can you tell me why you decided to join and exactly what's involved?

Face to face I have no problem talking to people about it. On the chat forums people always want to have a go. I tell people if they want to talk about it then they should come down to Walking Street and we will talk about it, face to face. With all the
keyboard bashing I have never had anyone come up and ask me about it in Walking Street.

For me there are two types of people who are against what we do. The first group is the people who are anti-authoritarian, possibly because they have been running from the authorities for much of their lives. And there are many of them in Pattaya. And
the second group are people who have heard about what we do through a third party, bar banter, idle chit chat or whatever. When people actually know what we do the majority of people are actually in favour of us. There are still some against us
but so long as they have something specific in mind as to why they don’t like it, then I don’t mind.

I am the group leader of the foreign tourist police assistants. I was the first active foreign tourist police assistant in Thailand apparently, so I am told.

That’s something to be proud of.

Yeah. What have I done over the 6 years? I have saved lives and I have avoided people ruining their lives. The work that we do on Walking Street varies from helping people who are lost to breaking up fights.

You’re not a small guy, do you think that helps?

The physical side of being a volunteer is minimal. We don’t actually do much of that. Most of it is sitting down and dealing with information. We are more like mobile information centres than police assistants. However, if there is a fight or some
sort of physical altercation, with the assistance of the tourist police we are happy to be involved. Sometimes we risk ourselves getting involved to help things.

Some people say we are crazy and some say we should not have the right to do that. We are in a position where we can genuinely help people and I think that is a good thing. We are not spies. We are not informants. However if someone gives me some information
about a paedophile I will almost certainly pass it on to the tourist police. People give me info all the time on people and I do not pass it on. I am not a grass. I have to be very careful because I am a businessman here in Pattaya and I cannot
let the tourist police work affect my business. I get nothing out of the FPTA work. No special visas. If I get stopped by traffic police I pay the fine. We are not allowed to show our badges. I do it because I like to help people. I don’t
drink, smoke or go to the bars so it gives me something to do.

What do you make of the expat community in Pattaya? My feeling is that there is much more camaraderie down here amongst Westerners than there is in Bangkok where things are much more splintered – and there seems to be more bitterness up there amongst the different ethnic and socio economic groups.

I think Pattaya is a great town to be an expat in. There’s such a wide mix of nationalities, cultures and there are many groups that bring them altogether. There are many expat clubs, other associations like the Lions, Rotary as well as other clubs.
It all brings expats together. Pattaya is a very friendly place to stay. Don’t get me wrong. There are certain groups that involve themselves in backstabbing and attacking other groups. You’re going to get that anywhere. It sounds
far different to the expat community in Bangkok.

It’s something I don’t like about Bangkok.

I used to work in Bangkok for MCOT, you know Channel 9 when it was Metropolis 107. It reformatted to a Thai station because they received like a golden carrot from the record companies who wanted to pay them a lot of money to play Thai music. All the
farangs were thrown out.

Invariably Bangkok expats look down on Pattaya expats. What do you make of that?

A lot of outsiders think that foreigners who settle in Pattaya are sex tourists or sex tourists who have settled in a town with lots of cheap sex. Yes, there are people who live here and engross themselves in the late night entertainment business. There
are plenty of professionals who have settled here too as well as retirees and foreign couples. I think one reason the expat community here is so strong helps people decide to live here. The majority of people living in Pattaya are generally respectful
and nice people.

How many farang news organisations are there in Pattaya? There seem to be many for such a small town. Speaking of which, do you have any idea of how many Westerners are resident here year round?

There are many English language media organisations in Pattaya mainly because there are so many businesses we can call on for advertising. No media company can survive without advertising.

Yep, I know that story!

So many types of companies are here. In a way it is maybe not so good there are so many media companies. Quite often the same story is interpreted differently by different organisations. There are lots of companies here and there are lots of people who
live here during the year.

I would estimate the permanent foreign residents probably number 20,000 – 25,000.

That is about what I would have thought.

But I would say that at any one time there are maybe 80,000 – 100,000 foreigners in Pattaya. I think that is a fair estimate.

What’s it like being one of the ten most influential farangs in Pattaya?

I don’t know where you got that from! As I said before, I am just a normal guy. If I am influencing people in Pattaya I hope I am influencing them to do good things and to be positive. This sounds like a presidential speech, doesn't it! Personally,
I don’t think I am influential. I am just trying to do my small bit in the community and make a few baht <chuckle>.

A good American friend of mine calls Pattaya “the pit”. What do you make of that nickname? Do you think it's appropriate?

Pattaya has an interesting mix of foreign people that come here. There are different classes of people who come here. You have the upper class living or staying in posh condos and homes. You have got the working class on a tight budget. They drink a lot,
are loud and may get themselves in a bit of trouble. And there are, for me, certain parts of Pattaya that can bring the town down. I won’t mention the areas.

To call Pattaya a pit is unfair. There’s lots to do in Pattaya apart form the girly bars and the boy bars. And with our new mayor there is more chance that Pattaya will improve. However I think many of the sex tourists may not like the improvements
that are coming. That comment is based on a discussion I have already had with the mayor who’s a very international-thinking young man. Good things are coming to Pattaya but whether these good things will improve the sex industry I am not
so sure.

The industry will never be eradicated but I think over the years it will become more controlled and more contained.

What do you make of the number of farang suicides in Pattaya? What is it that causes a man to leap from the balcony of his condo in what many claim is paradise?

Well in my capacity as a news writer I have reported on hundreds of suicides. Some clearly are suicides while others are questionable. Why do people jump? Assuming people do jump and they have not been pushed, I think it all goes down to the expectations
of people who come here and think it is paradise, that they will meet their dream partner and live happily ever after. It doesn’t always happen that way.

For me, I have gone through a number of relationships which have turned sour. There are some that come here and rely heavily on the partnership aspect of the relationship. If this partnership ceases it can cause them to fall in to depression and for some
it can tip them over the edge, pardon the pun, and cause them to take their own life.

Bar workers are good actors and actresses. Their job in general is to take our money for their families who are generally poor. That might sound a bit poor but for me looking at it from an outsider, looking into the sex industry, that is the way I feel.
The way they take the money is sometimes dishonest and guys can sometimes fall in love with their partners very quickly. If they’re tricked or cheated by their partner that can cause them to ultimately take their lives. That’s the
downside of the sex industry.

As a local, do you have any favourite spots you frequent? Any hidden treasures you’re prepared to share with the Stickman readership?

I spend most of my time in Secrets when I have free time.

So do I.

No hassles, good food, really good music. Everyone is friendly there. I do venture into gogo bars occasionally to say hello to some of the bar owners I know. I have got to know many over the years through my work with the tourist police. If I do go out,
I go and see a movie, go and eat some food. I am quite a boring guy really!

What do you miss most about home?

Home cooking, my friends.

English weather?

I don’t miss that! There are certain things you can get in England that you can’t get here. Some food. I don't really miss too much. I am happy in Thailand. Thailand is very different to England. It has its faults and it has its advantages
but generally I like it.

Are you like me, always wondering if staying in Thailand is the right thing and wondering whether you should return home?

If I was in a position where my business failed or something forced me out of the place I would have no problem going back to England, settling there again and working there. I like Thailand. I am not in love with it.

Do you have any plans to expand into Bangkok?

No, absolutely not. Bangkok is a very tricky market. There is no way I could get a frequency there. I am happy in Pattaya, stuck out here in the provinces, being a provincial player.

FROM STICK MARK II'S INBOX (These are emails from readers and what is written here was not written by Stick Mark II.) Preference may be given to emails which refer to the previous week's column.

EMAIL OF THE WEEK – The sweet, caring side of Thai nature is still flourishing.

Police state UK and underage Thais!

Trouble in American means trouble in Thailand.

A natural ability to deny everything?

The Dirty Doctor on the fake monks.

There was a huge fracas last Sunday night outside Spice Girls in Soi Cowboy. It appeared to start with a bottle being thrown at the bar opposite, in the direction of what can only be described as a pretty hard looking Thai guy. Things erupted and there
must have been about 20 bottles thrown, and then guess what, the Arab joined in and was verbally laying into the people at the bar opposite! He then also started throwing bottles, glass ashtrays and even a table at the guy opposite! Things started
getting out of control when a group of Thai guys who looked like Mafia types arrived and seemed to be ready to sort the Arab out. This went on for about an hour before the police came and after a long stand off the Arab was escorted away by a
group of police. He was not arrested, rather escorted for his own safety by the look of things. I didn't bother contacting the colourful bar mogul for comment.

Was it full moon last Sunday because there was another scrap that very same night in Soi 7/1 featuring a number of foreigners.

Construction has begun in the spot in Nana Plaza that was previously home to the original incarnation of the Big Mango bar. But it will not be home to Nana's newest bar. Oh no, Czech Peter, owner of the plaza's Hollywood bars has other plans
for it with of all things, a hotel planned that will have, get this, both short and long time rooms! I wouldn't have thought there was enough space, but what would I know?!

A rather hilarious rumour is doing the rounds that the Korean company which had been contracted to construct and install the grand new Walking Street sign at the start of Pattaya's most famous stretch has not just abandoned the project but has extricated
themselves from Thailand! I don't know why but when I first heard this I went into fits of uncontrollable laughter!

The lack of customers is killing Pattaya and I can honestly say, hand on hear, this past week was the quietest I have EVER seen in Pattaya. Ever! I would suggest that a few of the business owners I spoke to about Sin City being in the doldrums were close
to tears, many freely admitting that rather than the business putting money in their pockets, it was taking money out just to keep afloat. I ventured into some chrome palaces where there were NO CUSTOMERS. ZERO! I am not talking big name bars,
but I'm not talking awkwardly located no name venues either. One big name bar owner told me that trade is down 85% – and this was confirmed by my own eyes. Many bars that used to open at 6 PM now aren't opening until 8 and it would seem
that some bars have actually closed up shop for the low season.

Club Electric Blue in Patpong celebrates their 5th birthday party next Saturday, that is June 28. Big Andy would like to see all friends, old and new to help him celebrate. Free Tequila shots are offered with every drink you buy after happy hour.

A disconcerting trend in recent times is the number of girls who are seen down and out in a public place. I have observed this more in Pattaya than Bangkok – where the competition is more fierce and there are, quite simply, more girls and less customers
– but in Bangkok too, there are girls seriously down on their luck. The poor lass pictured here was out for the count on the busiest part of Sukhumvit one night this week and passers by proceeded as if she wasn't even there.

Closing times seem to have settled down and most nightspots seem to be closing at 2 AM. There are late night venues around about that run later. For the time being, Nana Disco is open until 3 AM.

A not insignificant number of punters claim that this is the best time of year to visit, the bars are quiet and they have the pick of the girls. I would suggest otherwise. There's an almost morbid feeling in the air in many bars and bar areas. The
girls just aren't as joyful as they usually are and many are heading back to the provinces to join the hordes that have already left. Pattaya is hurting very, very badly. Some bar owners looked like I'd put a gun to their head when the
realisation of what I said set in; that the next high season is going to be well done, with fuel prices at record highs.

For those averse to paying more than 100 baht for a beer, Magic Table in Sukhumvit's Soi 7/1 is a good bet. There's a distinct Baccara type view with the college-uniformed dancers on mirrored tables and the 95 baht beer all night long makes
it well worth a trip. The downside is that some of the girls are a bit aggressive when it comes to lady drinks and tips but it's nothing a skilled punter can’t handle. 95 baht beers are a good low season survival formula.

A reminder to be aware of your surroundings late at night between Nana and Asoke. A long term readers reports that some crotch-grabbing katoeys managed to relieve him of his wallet.

The American pornographer who was paraded before the press last week in Pattaya for the production of naughty movies featuring Thai women seemed to have rubbed many up the wrong way over the years. I have been amazed at the number of emails I received
from people who knew him or came across him as well as some of the vitriol on the various forums about him. His fan club had it in for him!

Did anyone hear about, or better still, witness, the armed raid on some bars in Soi Pattayaland 2 about 3 or 4 Fridays back? A small battalion – estimated at about 50 in number – of heavily armed police in body armour stormed at least one large bar and
pointed guns at punters, amongst other things! I only just heard about this on my journey to Pattaya this week. No wonder things are so quiet down there!

Hungry is the unimaginative name for the new restaurant in Nana Plaza, tucked in between Rainbow 3 and Cathouse. I've not had a chance to try it out there but it must be said it is a nice looking joint with both diner-style counter seating as well as tables. Prices are reasonable with many Thai dishes at just 50 baht, and even some fancier dishes priced at less than 100 baht.

One of the tricks running bars is to keep the girls "up" – bouncy and alive which helps to create and maintain a fun atmosphere in the bar. There is one Pattaya bar that does this by filling the girls with Tequila throughout the evening. Every
hour or so the girls get a shot of Tequila, that is every girl for those who refuse are docked 100 baht from their salary – and no girl is going to allow that to happen. Last week one of the owners got rather excited and the girls, at least those
who were still there at the end, were rather merry, the owner having treated the girls to nine shots of nasty Mexican loopy juice that night! For a small framed Thai girl, especially those new to the environment – and quite possibly new to drinking
– that will make them rather merry! In fact some were more than merry, making frequent trips to the loo spilling their guts out! Coyotes in Cowboy is another bar which does this with a bottle of Thai whiskey often seen down by the Buddhist shrine
at the end of the bar, although it is optional if the girls wish to partake of it.

I am hearing very good reports about 7 Seas, a single storey restaurant located on the corner of Sukhumvit sois 4 and 6 – that means it's down Soi 4, about 250 metres beyond the plaza. There're both indoor and outdoor seating and the venue is
nicely done out. Good quality meals will set you back 120 – 180 baht.

The fake monks that my pal the dirty doctor is trying to stamp out are spreading their wings and can be spotted all over the city, not just in the farang-infested areas. One reader reports seeing them in Ekamai where he was dining. A fake monk entered
the restaurant looking for money and this clever Stickmanite knew something was up when the masquerading scammer walked past all the Thais and headed directly to him for a donation. The manager saw this and started saying "blom, blom"
(fake) and the monk took off in a hurry.