Stickman's Weekly Column July 7th, 2002

Thai Girls Do Like Farangs



Sitting amongst a group of friends recently, one friend started relaying the story of a friend of his not known to the rest of us who had met a girl recently and how they have gone on to become boyfriend / girlfriend. The girl was described as a very attractive lady with a good job at a prominent Thai company . A few other details were given about her, all suggesting that she comes from a middle, possibly upper-middle class background. Many guys in the group openly gasped as it was revealed that she is a graduate of Chulalongkorn University. (Chulalongkorn, often abbreviated as Chula, is generally recognised as the finest university in Thailand.) While my friends were gasping at the thought that this guy had got himself a Chula girl, I just smiled to myself.

Sitting in foyer of the cinema complex at Emporium on Saturday night, Miss Stick commented to me that she really enjoys watching all of the farang male / Thai female couples coming and going. And indeed there were many, at least 10% of the customers being such couples. Now Miss Stick is far too polite to specifically comment on bargirls, but she is also learned enough to realise these girls' background – and their choice of job. I could see from the look on her fact the curiosity that she had. She has previously commented to me on such relationships, wondering why perfectly decent (on the surface at least) Western guys choose girls who would in so many cases, struggle to find a Thai guy to be their boyfriend.

It is important to realise that as educated, articulate individuals, there is no reason why Bangkok based farangs should not be meeting the very nicest, educated and attractive Thai ladies. Many university educated Thai girls would love the chance to meet an educated, worldly farang! And remember, there is a huge imbalance in university graduates in Thailand with female graduates outnumbering male graduates by more than two to one! A university educated Thai girl absolutely does not want to end up with a guy who has a vastly inferior education, especially in the absence of any other extreme, redeeming features.

I am of the belief that the argument that upper middle class and genuine upper class / wealthier Thais are not as friendly as their lower class countrymen is not entirely valid. Yep, it is absolutely true that they are far more difficult to meet than people from other sectors of society but have you ever stopped to consider why this is? Perhaps these educated folks are a little more discerning with the company that they keep? And surely, the pursuit of a discerning lady, someone who wants you because you are a great guy, rather than someone who simply wants you because you simply are farang (and perceived to be rich) is the way to go.

The "Chula girl", or any other university for that matter, girlfriend is not the elusive holy grail, and neither is she out of reach. As educated, responsible, often financially comfortable and in many cases good looking individuals, Bangkok based farangs can do so much better than bargirls. There is no reason to sell yourself short.

Sure, there are some very pleasant girls out there from the lower classes and if you meet one and fall in love with her, then great, I wish you all the best. But many people seem to specifically target girls from this level of society because they wrongly believe that Thai girls from the upper classes are out of reach. They are not! It is a fallacy! Is it really so hard to believe that nice Thai girls might actually like nice farang guys? I mean, if it works one way, is there any reason why it can’t work the other?

Nice Thai girls DO like nice farang guys. The big question remains: are you a nice guy?!


Where is this pic?

Now this one is really tricky…..

I am sorry to say that there are no more prizes for being the first to get the where is this pic. It has simply been too much hassle for me to deliver the calendars to people. I have a stack of calendars and if you want one, just let me know and it is yours, absolutely free. BUT, you must be local and you must collect it. Packaging and posting it up is NOT part of the deal!

If you got fxxxed, would you fxxx back?

I would seek revenge against a Thai girl if she did something nasty to me depends on what she did. If she simply cheated on me or lied, even after years of a relationship or marriage, there would be no need for revenge, since I would never be surprised at something like this. Now, if she damaged my motorcycle, then we have trouble. Nobody fucks with my grand & glorious ride! The fact that I am not a trusting soul is a consequence of witnessing so many incredibly evil acts by women (and men!) toward myself and others that I could almost say that I've seen it all. I am at the point where I have constructed my safety wall so high that it would take a rocket to scale the MF'er. Trust is built only through time. If a farang openly trusts a bargirl who he knows almost nothing about, he is proving himself gullible and naive. We are all responsible for our own plights, to a large degree. We all sleep in the beds we make. If you leave yourself open to being really screwed by ANY woman, you are asking for it. Only the strong survive. Wake up and smell the coffee. In the beginning (at least according to Christian scripture), there was man and woman. Eve chose to defy God and taste of the "forbidden fruit." I believe God first exiled Eve from paradise, and offered Adam the opportunity to remain, as he had been faithful to God, as far as we know. But Adam, being the typical Neadrothal man, chose to chase down his coquettish little vixen and thus begin man's saga of turmoil at a women's expense. Revenge therefore, is a moot point. If a man allows himself to be deceived by a woman, he can only blame himself. We should all be taught from the beginning not to trust a woman–the Bible itself is evidence of this. (Paul even writes in the Second Letter to Timothy New Testament, that no woman shall hold position of authority over man because she was the one who defied God.) Simply put, revenge and retaliation is obligatory in drastic circumstances. Look at your readers submissions – the vast majority are all negative experiences. Mostly middle aged + guys who have been taken to the cleaners for no reason. Are they suppose to take it? Frankly I am about sick and tired at how so many foreign guys extend their friendship and trust to these girls and yet still get fecked over. If these guys send out the message that it's ok to use me, disobey me and disrespect me than what hope do the rest have? Granted I have noticed that too many guys just walk into these situations (e.g. forming "honest relations" with bar girls in the first place – …yeah just about impossible!!). I don’t know if I would do it myself, but it can only be a positive thing if a vulgar upstart is brought down a peg or two. Personally I believe that extreme revenge is perfectly acceptable if a guy is really poorly treated, where he has been fair and honest to her always. Maybe this is seldom the case though to be honest…? I think anyone with sense knows by now though that it all boils down to cultural differences and how honesty and trust is not a cultural norm( I mean not taken very seriously) in Thai society. This can make things a real mess, because both partners expectations and assumptions are different. If the guy has a short fuse than it really is not rocket science to see that he might just go bananas over a cultural clash. I don't believe revenge is childish in any way. If one has been betrayed within a personal relationship and the betrayal is so deep that it can not be forgiven, revenge is necessary and revenge should be sought. However, some people forget that revenge should not be an instant-retaliatory type of behaviour. People should wait a while before delivering their revenge!! The longer you wait to deliver your revenge, the better!!! Revenge is a dish best served cold!!!…
Farangs out of favour?
Firstly, have you seen that bloody Krung Thai Bank advert on the telly?…The one which shows white people showing Thais how to do Thai things! And which later asks: "Do you want this?" Is the bank trying to fuel even more Thai resentment towards white people? Why does it only show white people, and not black or Indian or Chinese people? When have white people ever tried to teach Thais how to do Thai things..i.e Thai boxing, Thai cooking, dancing, etc. It's nothing more than racism and bigotry..and would surely not be allowed on TV in Europe or USA. Perhaps its just coincidence that the bank in question is state-owned…and we all know about the Thaksin government's love of foreigners. This leads me to my second grievance: I'm in the process of changing apartments (again) but have been told in two recent enquiries that "No, we don't want farangs here." This is about the third or fourth time this has been said to me. How can they get away with such blatant racism? I've been in Thailand for 11 years and it seems the racism is getting worse. Perhaps it's time to leave.
Couldn't agree more…
If the girl rips you off, either by stealing your stuff, or bull-shiting you and going behind your back, or gets pregnant on purpose even after the above precautions have been taken, then you've made a serious error in judgement. Shit happens all over the world, but it will tend to fall on you unless you put up your umbrella when it's raining.
Oh, but what a ride it has been. WHAT A RIDE!
Here it is Stick..the end result of years of wasted time in Thailand. The Thai / Falang thing finally explained. It's really very simple…if you don't mind generalisations… western men are romantics…Thai women (all Asians really) are pragmatists…that's it…..
Are they all a bunch of dogs.
I am on Samui right now and I was at a bar yesterday talking to this nice bar woman (she was about 35). A dog comes up to the table and we start playing with it. Then she points to the dog and says "Maa, same same you." Meaning of course that I was like a dog. Well gee wiz I get kinda pissed off at this remark. I paid up and left in a bit of a huff. Do you think they really see us as dogs though? I think lots of farang see them as the dogs.

Clinton Plaza is falling apart…. The Whitehouse GoGo bar,
a bar that never really reached great heights is now demolished.

On 24th June all 'businesses' (I use the term loosely) at Clinton Plaza received a letter from the 'New Owners' (again I use the term loosely!). Again an unsigned letter, again not on headed note paper – and only a telephone number for identification. This time indicating that whilst they do not recognise and business activity on their premises they are open to talks for those who want to operate on the land. Go figure, make of it what you will. One bar owner's guess is that they now realise they are going to be in court for a while with the sub lease holder at least, who has just applied for an injunction to stop them drilling. Also their plans to build a hotel on the land will take a while to get on the drawing board and subsequently onto a building site, so why not try and get some rent with a limited term contract in the interim.

What is going on with pricing at The Living Room where friend reported that a Heineken draft, 250 ml, costs 90 baht and a bottle of Heineken, 300 and something ml cost the same, 90 baht!

In a recent column, I included an extract from a reader which stated how one can determine whether a mirror is two way or not. Well, another reader did that very test on the mirrors in one of the rooms in the Eden Club, and well, guess what…. Go and do the test yourself and see what you find. And don't forget to to say cheese! And no, one shouldn't think that is being paranoid at all! Up at Panthip Plaza, some of the biggest sellers are the aeb doo and aeb tie series of VCDs. Translated into English, this basically means hidden video! Yep, there are MANY VCDs available there with folks unknowingly filmed while partaking in the bedroom olympics! And I just love what it says on the cover of one of the aeb tie series which translates roughly as – "don't laugh too loud because it might be you who is in this movie"! I guess one suddenly has to question the wisdom of using short time venues!

Big Blue Bar on Sukhumvit is open again and already a lot of people are in there. It looks like the reopening happened without a party or any specials. But the question that must be asked is why is it so damned expensive. Why is that? The prices are inline with real high end places, yet this place is a haven for working girls! Funny how after you've been here a while you get really averse to 150-180 baht drinks. Think about drink prices versus, even somewhere relatively expensive like the States where they run about 160 baht for a beer (in a swanky bar), maybe 100 or 120 baht in a more homely (but generally quite decent) sort of place. "The Strip" needs a head check sometimes.

I notice cans of Coke are for sale at 7 Eleven stores for the princely sum of 11 baht, or around 25 US cents. Must make it one of the cheapest places in the world to buy it.

Horrible, horrible rumours coming out of Black And White Bar in Soi Cowboy where there is a girl who is purportedly a virgin – and the staff are trying to sell the said virginity for 20,000 baht. No doubt, they would reap a significant amount of commission from thje sale too… My heart goes out to the girl involved, if it is indeed true that she is a virgin. That they are trying to sell her is absolutely true for it was a friend was offered her.

And speaking of Soi Cowboy, it seems that quite a few of the bars have been told to cover up. Even Long Gun, for so long the bastion of Soi Cowboy and the place with perhaps the best lewd shows in the entire Kingdom, the girls were totally covered up. Long Gun with the girls covered up is a bit like chocolate cake without the icing.

A familiar sign from Patpong soi 1…

An interesting story came out of Samui this week. Some bars at Lamai Beach have been dispensing tranquillizers to the girls. The idea is not to rob the guys, but rather to make them sleep so that they are unable to perform like a finely tuned thoroughbred all night, thus reducing the girl's workload! And one of the bars, for so long a landmark, Nana Bar, just got demolished a week ago. Also, the transportation down on Samui seems to be getting better with a lot more air-con taxis and more and more motorbike taxis around. And the word is that Chaweng is going more and more upmarket with prices fast catching up to Phuket. Chaweng also seems to have a younger crowd with more Western couples whereas Lamai seems to have more male Westerners. There are also rumours of there being a shortage of som tum vendors on Lamai Beach. Rumour has it that the mafia has taken an interest in the vendors down there and driven them out of town because the vendors were not prepare to pay. Could this be a case for Samui's favourite Gourmet, Mr Baronbonk, to solve?

Since the World Cup has finished, a lot of people have cleared out from Thailand and left, and one quickly notices that certain areas are a lot quieter – and somewhat more civilised too. Word is that Pattaya is really quiet now.

Week before last, there were quite a few people who could not access this column for a few days. It seems that this was due to a cache problem on their system whereby the weekly column menu was not downloading from the server, but rather just from their cache. Why it happened that week and not others, I do not know. Most readers seemed to be able to access the column as per usual. If the column doesn't download as it should, go to the previous week's column, open that, and then just add 1 to the number of the column so for example, this week is 63, so for next week you would just change 63 to 64. Easy!

The Siam Commercial bank branch in Siam Square no longer has a queue system for customers wanting to transact via a teller but rather a numbered ticket and wait for your number to come up before approaching the appropriate teller. I don't know if this is supposed to be an improvement, but people are reporting waits of up to on hour to conduct a simple transaction! This branch has always been busy, but waiting times seem to be getting worse and worse.

Near The Saen Saeb canal main boat stop at Pratunam is a massage parlour that I guess could best be described as being located diagonally across from the World Trade Centre. Some of the ugliest trolls in Bangkok seem to ply their wares out of there and I have often wondered if anyone would actually pay for anything more than a rub down in there… Actually, I'm sure no-one ever pays for anything more. Anyway, such massage parlours are not at all the sort of place where prim and proper Thais hang out…or do they? Walking past there at 7:00 AM on Friday, I notice that at that unGodly time of the day, a food vendor sets up tables outside the massage parlour – and also puts tables within the main foyer area. And the table were packed with well to do office workers… I've got to say it surprised me for there is no way they would step foot anywhere near such an establishment, let alone enter – even if it was for food.

I popped into Dunkin Donuts in Siam Square this week to grab some breakfast…the muffins aren't bad but be warned, the croissants are VERY average. Anyway, it would appear that the manager of the branch does not understand English very well at all. No, it is not that there are signs up in bad English, quite the contrary. But what they have had this week is a strange compilation of rap music playing over the sound system inside the restaurant. A mix of colourful songs, one with a fellow claiming that it was better to buy weed than go to school and another where the fellow was talking about how he had two bits of "booty" and how he couldn't choose between one girls round melons and anther's tight, fine ass. Well Dunkin' Donuts, your breakfasts are awful and I'll be going back to my old routine at Au Bon Pain, but the music sure did put a bit of a smile on my face. (No, I can't stand rap, but to watch all these prim and proper Thais sitting with the family unbeknownst to what lyrics were playing sure was a laugh!) And walking past three days later, the same tape is STILL playing!

I was in Bookazine earlier this week and there is a new book with stories of sex tourists, sex tourism and all of that sort of thing. My memory is getting worse with age, so I cannot remember the name. It wasn't that big, but I couldn't check it out because every copy was annoyingly packaged in that sealed plastic wrapping.

Are the staff at the Nana Hotel the rudest people in Thailand? The few instances when have been forced to communicate with them have been less than pleasant moments.

Ahhh, all is well up at Panthip and everything is back to normal. Lots of software out and about, including all of the really hardcore porn, including all fo the hidden video stuff is right out in the open. To me, this is all the more surprising because this stuff is locally made, and not imported…and just who knows who they have captured?

If it is no good to marry a bargirl, as I have said a thousand times, does the reverse apply? I.e. it is no good for a non bar-girl to marry a reformed whoremonger?

The baht continues to increase in value against the $US… 41.6 and counting. Where is it going? All sorts of crazy predictions abound whenever the currency movies more than a couple of %. I prefer to think of it as a correction for a US dollar which had become ridiculously strong and arguably, overvalued. Let's see that $US slide below 35 to the baht while other currencies cross rates with the baht don't move too much.

Apologies for the fact that there was no column last week and that this week's column is really late. The simple reason for it is that I have been putting my personal life first in recent times. Work has been a lot tougher over the past few months and come the weekend, the weekly doesn't quite get the same priority as it used to. I need time to relax too! There is no chance of the weekly going by the wayside or anything like that though! I'll still continue my mad rant each week for a long, long time to come!

Your Bangkok commentator,

Stick