How I Discovered Your Site Part 2
So I finish part one with a cliff hanger conclusion only to go back to my regular life, not thinking anyone gave a damn. I checked my e-mail and no one had responded to my story. I thought for sure I could have connected with others who went through a similar experience as in my original post How I Discovered Your Site I also recommend that you refresh your memory by reading it before moving on to part two. Then after taking some time to myself I checked my alternate e-mail account on New Year’s day and was fascinated by some of the comments I received. This has given me new energy to finish writing this story and I hope you find it as interesting.
Ok, so where was I…yes…back home with the wife…
So we return home on the opposite coast and my mind is still reeling for having unprotected sex with a bargirl. Fortunately and unfortunately I had given the girl my mobile number. More on that mistake later. My plan was to return to Pattaya and convince this bargirl to get tested for sexually transmitted diseases and HIV. Yes, I’ve done the research and I am fully aware that it can take 6 weeks – 3 months in order for symptoms to show up. But for me, it was more ‘peace of mind’ thinking that I only had that window to worry about. My plan was to still get tested once I arrived back home.
Several days later I phoned the girl and told her I wanted to come back and see her. However, my main motive was to build trust and convince to her to go with me to a hospital. She gave me the usual “Kee-tung” and said she wanted to be number one. Then out of the blue that evening my friend said he found a concert being held in Pattaya and wanted to go back. Bingo, I now had a motive to return without my wife being suspicious. I also did not tell my friend the complete story because I was ashamed.
That week my wife made plans for all of us to go down south and visit her family. The original plan was to go with her, but now I had an excuse to leave early with my friend. While in the south, I was able to escape on a 3-day adventure to Ko Samui (I will leave that for another post) and I will admit it did help keep my mind busy on the complicated task that lay ahead.
Finally the day comes and it’s a long bus ride back to Pattaya. I tell my friend that we should go our separate ways for the first night as I told him I wanted to hang out with the same bargirl that evening. I phoned her from my hotel and told her I was back in town. She seemed genuine when she said she was patiently waiting for me and was excited to see me. It took a while for me to find a motorbike for rent and then the calls kept coming wondering what was taking me so long. Little did I know that there were others in line waiting for my girl and she wanted to make sure I was coming back.
When I arrived at the bar she looked different. She seemed angry that it took me so long to drop by. I knew that I needed to smooth her over and decided to barfine her right away and go back to my hotel. It was shortly after seven in the evening when we enter my room and she immediately wants to get the action started. I was smart enough to bring condoms this time and will admit that I found her very attractive and was quickly seduced by her charm. After an hour of fun, she said she wanted to go back to the bar. WTF? This is where the new reality struck me on how things really have changed. In 2003 a girl would have been happy to spend the night, but she was insistent on going back. Shit! My plan was to stay with her that evening and begin the conversation of going to the hospital the following day. She was acting strange, saying that she was not a good girl and that she would never be my number one. I asked her not to leave, stating that I had barfined her. But of course little did I know there were more barfines and customers waiting.
So it’s around eight in the evening and I am fuming. Despite making up a story that I came all the way back to spend time with her, she wants to go back to the bar. Again, Stick, I am still under the illusion that these girls give a damn and enjoy spending time with customers or guys they like. After an hour of watching TV and drinking Chang Beer in my room, I say “Fxxx it”. I go back to the bar and guess who jumps into my arms and is happy to see me, albeit drunk at this point! I ask to speak to the mamasan and inquire about my barfine and why she is back at the bar. The mamasan tells me that most barfines are for short time. I then proceed to walk out of the bar without looking at her and she runs after me holding my arm and is asking me to stay. She says she is sorry and wants me to have a drink with her and she will pay. After some small talk, my mood changes and I convince her to come out with me and have an evening together. She agrees and off we go. I am back on track with the game plan.
After a fun evening we return to my room and the next morning I begin the talk of how we had sex without a condom the first time and that I am really worried. I also state that if she likes to have sex without a condom then it would be beneficial for us to get tested. That morning her phone kept ringing and just as I was about to convince her to come with me, she said she needs to meet someone. I then go into desperate mode and tell her that I will pay her two thousand baht if she goes with me. This changes her mood a little and after another 30 minutes of talking she says OK.
I quickly take her with me and we go to the nearest international hospital. I explain to the receptionist what I need and we proceed to the waiting room and wait for the doctor. Now the shame really kicks in when I speak to a lady doctor why I am there and during the conversation she managed to convince me that I should be tested too.
So off we go into a room where I undergo the cruel experience of having a cue tip or swab stick inserted into my penis. But the real kicker here is that the male nurse doing this looked new and needed to perform THREE swabs before telling me he did it correctly.
Next is the blood test and at this point I could tell that the girl was annoyed by all this and I was afraid she might just slip out of the hospital if I turned my back on her. Meanwhile, her phone kept ringing and she kept telling the person on the other line that she needed more time.
So all is done and now it is time to pay the bill. I said that since I am paying I wanted consent from her that I could receive her results. The doctors said that it would take several hours for the HIV and possibly longer for the STDs and that I could call or drop in to get results. So I paid the 8,000 baht bill and only gave her a thousand for coming with me as I did not have any other cash with me at the time. She tells me she really needs to go back to the bar and I drop her off and tell her I will phone her when I get the results.
It is now afternoon and I need to do something to kill time. I phoned my friend and we met up at a shopping centre and catch a movie. Halfway through the show, I get a call from the hospital telling me my HIV results are in and that I can drop by anytime. I ask if they can share over the phone and the lady is relunctant. Soon after, my bargirl phoned me and asks me if I want to barfine her again as it is a new day. I tell her that I am at the movies and am about to leave to get results from the hospital. I asked if she wanted to meet me there, but she said she could not as I needed to barfine her.
I quickly drive over to the hospital and meet the doctor again. I sit down and she opens my file… Tic toc… the longest 5 seconds of my life. “Don’t worry, no HIV, you are ok.” A huge weight is lifted from my shoulders. “But”, she says, “you’re lady has syphilis.” Damn, weight is back on. “You do not have it,” she says. “You are ok.” My phones rings again and guess who? Bargirl is really on me now, asking why I am not there yet. I tell her 15 more minutes and she hangs up. The doctor informs me that my bargirl is also very dehydrated and that she will need medicine to clear up her syphilis.
20 minutes later I finally arrive back with test results in my hands. Her friends are in front of the bar and I do not see her. I am eager to inform her the good and bad news, but she is not there. I can tell something is up. They tell me she is out eating with a friend, but I don’t buy it and then the shocker. After a terrific evening, a good morning talk, a bonding experience at the hospital, my bargirl is walking back hand in hand with some Russian dude. She sees me and tries to duck down an alley, but it is too late…BUSTED. I drive my motorbike next to the surprised couple. I have the papers in my hand and ask her if she wants to know. She just stands there looking dumbstruck. I give her the paper and drive off without saying a word.
Several hours later my phone won’t stop ringing. At first I ignored it. I later return to the bar to say goodbye. She gives me the big speech that she was waiting for me for over an hour and that the Russian was a good customer and that he barfined her. I told her I understood and explained to her the importance of getting her medicine and the importance of staying hydrated. I could have barfined her again, but my mission was accomplished. How in reality could I be mad at her, when I was also playing a deception game to get what I wanted. I had the results and my mind was more at ease and I was looking forward to returning home the following day.
However, this story does have a bad ending. When all was said and done I did pay for my mistake. For some reason the bargirl began calling me after I had returned home. I told her not to communicate as I was with my family. Then I got a call late one night and it was her again, drunk, stating that she wanted to be my number one. My wife heard her speaking at the other end. I looked at her and for some reason I did what most men never do…I told her the truth. I told her about the condom incident, about the need to go back, about the need to get tested. It also was not a lie that my main reason for going back was that I refused to be a husband who transmits something on to his wife.
Stick, I must tell you that at first I was shocked by her reaction. She was very calm and asked me if I was ok. At this point I was crying and telling her that my plan was not to leave her or wanting a full time girlfriend. I also expressed my deepest regret and that I did learn my lesson. She said that she was disappointed and upset and would be watching me more closely from now on. It was a very difficult moment. I did have the typical fear that I would wake up the next day with my penis in the toilet, but none of that ever happened. That night I took my SIM card out of my phone and broke it. I deleted all the Thai contacts on my phone and finished my holidays watching TV on the couch.
To this day I no longer have as much freedom as I once did and I am ok with that. I can still go out late with my friends and her trust in me has not made me want to venture out and go lady hunting. I have continued to be faithful and have no desire to have any kind of relationship with a bargirl.
Your website and the submissions were my main therapy to get through this. By reading other people’s stories about bargirls and seeing how shallow and calculating they are, just made me want to learn more on why they do what they do. I cannot wait to go back to Thailand in a few months. I feel that I understand more about the game and am no longer naïve that these girls like you for you. It was fun believing in the illusion and thinking the girlfriend experience was real. I am not lying here when I say that I did enjoy the girlfriend experience, that is all I really wanted, some fresh company to go to a disco with and have a good time. It made me feel young to flirt, touch, maybe kiss and then go home. I messed up, I let my guard down and learned a valuable lesson.
Three months after returning home, I still had one last hurdle to go through. There was no sex at home until the final HIV test. I went to my local health unit and got it done. I dodged a bullet Stick, the test came back negative. NEVER again will I fall into this trap. A big thanks to you and to all the others who shared their stories. No words can describe how much you all helped me through this difficult time in my life.