Stickman Readers' Submissions April 10th, 2010

A Thai Girl’s View of Western Women

It is interesting reading the various stories of late concerning western women. I have read a number of submissions and found myself nodding my head in agreement.

I was twice divorced (3 kids included) by the time I was 35, and therefore would put myself in the slow learner camp. Potentially retarded even!

He Clinic Bangkok

My story is not one of losing substantial assets, but it certainly has been a financially devastating experience.

I come from the land down under. In Australia, if you have a penis and enter the family court system you are generally going to be raped firstly by your lawyer, secondly be her lawyer and finally by the judge.

Wife number one decided to accuse me (falsely) of a range of things including the sexual abuse of my 2 year old son. Long story short, I did not see him for almost one year. No judge will take the chance that she could be telling the truth…even
if I could prove she was lying. After one year of repeated court appearances, an independent psychologist was appointed by the court to investigate. It was determined at the conclusion of the investigation that not only should he be living with
me, but he was actually not safe with his mother.

CBD bangkok

At that point she fled the state with my son and her lesbian lover in contravention of the court orders and tried to hide some 2,000 km away. Yes, I am serious!! She was found and ordered to return or face arrest by the police. A bit of a
Hollywood drama, but that was her style. I then took custody of my 4 year old son and have had him ever since. He turns 14 next week, and it was only two years ago he discovered she was a compulsive liar and an unstable individual.

She passed away last year, after spending the last 10 years giving us as much grief as possible. A really sad story, but it is what it is. Her impact on our life weakened as my son got older.

The upside of that experience was that we were young and dumb when we were married so had no assets. I was not working so was able to have my legal costs covered by the government. The downside was the significant stress it placed upon my
son and I, and not seeing him for one year simply because she opened her mouth.

Wife number two knew of, and even lived through some of my previous experiences. Therefore, she had learned the tricks of the system and how best to manipulate it! Oh no!

wonderland clinic

Things were different this time. While we didn’t have substantial assets, I was working and had to pay all my legal costs. She wasn’t, so it was a free ride for her.

Again, like wife number one she accused me (falsely) of various things. She was also able to keep my kids away from me for almost one year aside from 6 hours every second Saturday. Finally, the expert court appointed psychologist investigated
and concluded in my favour. She still didn’t give up (this ex wife is never wrong no matter how many people tell her), and took me all the way to the day of the final court hearing. Why? Because that was going to inflict maximum financial
damage upon me. That was her sole intent.

On the final day, she relented and gave me exactly what I had asked for one year earlier. How much did this pointless and frivolous exercise cost me? Approximately $30,000. I had to take out a bank loan which will likely take years to pay
off. The repayments are a significant portion of my salary. I was even sued by one of my lawyers for fees which I disputed. As I said, raped by everyone including those who were meant to be on my team.

How do I tie this story to Thailand and a Thai girl’s view of western women?

I went over to the LOS and fell in love as many of us have done. My girl came out to spend time here 3 times last year. She was present at two of my court hearings too. What were her observations of our system?

My girl is a type of person who wants to be everybody’s friend. She used to lecture me to be nice and just give my ex what she wants. When my ex would refuse to hand over my kids in direct contravention of the court orders, my Thai
girl would be so ‘helpful’ and tell me that maybe my kids just want to spend time with their mother. Needless to say, that didn’t go down too well and she was told in no uncertain terms it would be best to keep such unqualified
opinions to herself!

As the months passed, her views changed. Frequently she would say that my ex is “such a bitch! She is so nasty!” She would say “I have been living with you for months, and you have never done anything to cause problems,
but your ex seems to always want a war”. Yep…welcome to my world.

Her comments shortly before leaving Australia were that the system here is extremely unfair for men. She also noted that a lot of the women are ‘bitches’ and ‘too confident’. I don’t know if that is because
some of my closest friends are in similar situations to me, and therefore her view of western women may have been a little (not too much!) biased.

Unfortunately for unrelated reasons, my relationship with my Thai darling has ended. The prospect of getting married again causes me to wake up in cold sweats at night. And if I am going to end up with another woman, she needs to be easy
to be with. Too many Thai girls (in my humble opinion) are simply immature and it can be like dealing with my 6 year old daughter at times. But that’s another submission in itself. I tend to digress easily, so will end it with this…

I have played the marriage game and didn’t like it, so will now just sit on the sidelines and watch others. When it’s good, it’s good…but when it’s bad…well…just refer to the above.

Stickman's thoughts:

There's a little gem in there, right near the end. I absolutely agree that any woman you enter a long term relationship with needs to be easy to be with. That's one of those things that I think really should be near the top of a man's list.

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