Stickman Readers' Submissions December 10th, 2009

Starting Rotation

When I lived in Bangkok, I had what I call a "starting rotation" of three girls and would often bring in a freelancer for some variety when I felt like it. I would wander around the lower Sukhumvit area around twilight and chat up whoever seemed
interesting. Often they would be buying snacks or just walking…around the Beergarden on Soi 7 (the BG7) is often better than IN the BG7 itself.

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At least one of my regulars was also a freelancer. I met her in the alley just outside the BG7. Our first encounter was great, the second was better…I continued to see this gal for years, even after I'd moved out of Bangkok.
She was in her late 20s, and she was a tall 166 cm large-framed (not a gram of body fat, just a wider-frame than your typical Thai "spinner") woman with a wonderful sense of humor. She was darker than your typical Sino-Thai porcelain
princess and didn't have drop-dead gorgeous looks, and none of that mattered a whit.

I do speak some Thai so we established quickly that this was a business relationship, although we did become friends and sometimes I'd put on a movie, get some snacks or whatever if I knew she was coming over. If I wanted to
see her I would send her a flirty text message, flirting with her via text was surprisingly erotic "foreplay." Sometimes she would say that evening was not convenient, so I would text back, "OK, see you next time."
And I would. There was less BS in this relationship than in most relationships I've ever been in.

Only once did I have her stay long-time because I feared it would be hazardous to my health! The reason Massive Attack (the nickname I always used for her as I like the band, and it suits) was a freelancer, I think, is because she
was what I'd call 99th percentile on the "I love sex" scale. She was an extremely healthy gal and fond of orgasms, to understate matters. After I'd known her for awhile, she told me that when she was 21, she spent a
year in a "Tom-Dee" relationship (as the Dee of course). I believe her because she was such an orgasm-fan that I can see her being with someone who would provide those, regardless of gender. She was a realist and I knew she was
working a Swiss guy…because she told me. I know he was problematic, because sometimes she would ask me for advice. I would give her honest advice because I considered her a friend, but I would also say: "I wish you the best, but
because I'm selfish, I hope that I can continue to see you whatever happens."

The freelancer-thing can be a real trap despite my wonderful times with El Massif. I have some advice:

1) Don't pick up freelancers if you've been drinking heavily. Not all are trustworthy (this really doesn't need to be said!) and if it's obvious that you're the worse for drink, this presents opportunities
for the avaricious.

2) Learn at least enough Thai to say "pai nai?" (a typical greeting) to start the conversation. That way they know this isn't your first freelancer-pickup (even if it is). It's also a good practice to
learn Thai numbers. I wouldn't suggest long time for a first-time freelancer, and I think a gray note is reasonable compensation for a short time. If you really have a great time, toss in taxi-fare and get her phone number.

3) Keep your valuable stuff in the hotel-safe or some other hidden place. Your main defence is keeping a cool heart, smiling and keeping things light. But cash / iPods / cameras / laptops should be out of sight, at least until after
you've showered.

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4) Some gals will allow you take their photo, but always respect their wishes. Don't assume they're gonna play porn star for your digicam on a first date. Additional compensation is not always the issue here. Be respectful.

5) For some of these dames, life is far from easy. Buy some streetside or 7 Eleven snacks and beverages for her. Treat her as you would a guest (which, actually, she is). Be flexible and gracious. It does depend on how long you're
in town for, how much Thai you can speak, but for most freelancers a good attitude and a smile are worth more than the cash you'll be parting with.

6) If you're a butterfly, tell her upfront. A surprising amount of guys spend their entire holidays with the first girl they picked up. If that's what you want, great, but be careful not to let one gal take control of you
right off the bat. Send her off and if you like her, call her the next day. Don't stumble over any guilt-trips. The scene is all about variety.

Stickman's thoughts:

Lots of good advice and for sure, #6 is spot on. I have never understood how some guys hook up with the first girl they meet and spend all holiday with her – and sometimes even end up marrying her!

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