An Internet Girl
I decided to write this after reading these submissions:
The Computer Lady
Normal Girls / Bar Girls, What's the difference?
I temporarily fell in love with a "Thai hooker" via the internet. I know it sounds bizarre, but I was not the only one on her list. Prior to my experience, if someone else had sent this in I would have concluded that the writer was pathetic and mentally disturbed, so maybe I am. By the way, I had been to Thailand many times before. I had realized that perceived relationships with bar girls were just a lust episode by my 3rd visit, and after that, the girls had minimal long term effect on me. I have been in the hotel room with them when their out-of-country sponsor called.
There is never one rule that covers everything precisely, but my generalization is that many of the internet girls have a similar agenda as the bar girls. It took a while but I figured it out early enough to avoid monetary loss and minimize emotional stress. I have no intention to stop seeing the lovely ladies. However, I will keep my mind sharp, and my finances secured. That is not a bad policy to have anywhere in the world. I realize that there are people out there who view internet dating as an anything goes forum where you tell the opponent whatever you think they want to hear so that you can meet and get what you want. Maybe those people will think I am stupid for writing this story.
The beginning: A TLL membership
It seemed like a good idea to sign up for a TLL membership. The fee was pretty cheap, and there were hundreds, if not thousands of good looking Thai ladies on line looking for men. In a very short time, I had contacts with hundreds of them. Most of the contacts were initiated by the ladies, and some of them had nice profile photos. I tried to meet about 12 of them when I visited Thailand on two trips. Only 6 of the girls showed up. Of them, I classified 1 as bad or maybe evil. 4 were not very interesting. One was somewhat ok. One other thing, none of the 6 looked very much like her profile picture. I concluded that as a tourist, I was better off sticking to ladies that I came across when I was in Thailand on a visit. Just before I switched off my membership, I found a really interesting lady. I will call her Mango in this story. After some introduction chat, we moved to msn to continue our correspondence. Mango always wanted to use the web cam so we could see each other. Mango was good looking, and a fun person to talk with. We found out about each other and it looked like she was a really good one. After about 6 weeks, I switched of my TLL, and a week later she switched off her membership. (I later found out that she switched off her membership because her schedule was booked full) On the surface it seemed like I had found someone that I could see on a regular basis, and maybe settle with when I moved to Thailand in a few years. It turned out that a lot of men shared my idea.
The middle: Finding out more
I decided that it was time to find out what kind of potential the relationship had. I told Mango how I felt about her and also told her that I would understand if she was currently talking with other men and planning to meet them. After all, the girls on the other end have no idea which man will really come through for them. Mango's response was that I was the only one, and that she would wait for me until I made my next visit. This sounded nice, but it was inconsistent with what I knew about her. When we first met, Mango said that she was getting 10 to 20 TLL messages per day, and that I was her number 1. When we first started to chat on msn, she asked if it was ok for her to chat with other people. I had no problem with that. Now, all of a sudden, I am the only one in the world. It was easy to tell that Mango chatted with multiple people when I was on msn with her. There were also time gaps of days and weeks where she was "busy with her job", or "traveling with her parents". So I did a little more checking. Mango was chatting with, and seeing many guys and was telling the same thing to all of them. She had lots of appointments to meet men when they visited Thailand on holiday. She also had a list of farang who lived in Thailand. That was just her internet contacts. I could only guess about her phone contact list.
One guy was in the process of getting a visa for Mango so that she could go to the US and marry him. This did not slow her down in her quest to see more men. Maybe she figured that she would keep working all of them until one of them came through. I remember reading that the visa process takes 4 to 6 months with no guarantees that it will succeed. Maybe she was planning to collect multiple dowry payments.
When I had talked to her about meeting, Mango told me that she was a good girl and would not feel comfortable meeting me alone in BKK and that it would be better for me to travel to see her near where she lived. She said that she would bring a friend when we visited. When it came to the other guys, she had no problem traveling to BKK or Pattaya to meet them, and then stay with them for the duration of their visit. I did not to know what to make of this.
Mango seemed to have two types of clients. One type was the foreign man who was delighted that he had found such a wonderful lady to see on his holiday trip. The other type was the foreign man living in Thailand who was blunt and to the point with messages something like "I want see you. Want f— you again". Maybe Mango used to work in the bars, and had moved on to working the internet.
There are probably lots of ladies on the internet who are basically honest, or at least I hope so. However, I recall that when I was in BKK on a previous visit, an ex-pat advised me to stay away from internet girls.
As far as I was concerned, there was little difference between this lady and one who worked in a bar or hung out in one of the pick-up areas of Sukhumvit or Pattaya. Mango was more educated and less honest than the typical pick-up/bar girl, and seemed to be very smart. I think that if this lady gets her hooks into a man, she can easily bleed his bank account dry and make him into a mental basket case in short order. Mango is doing this for the money, and has found that she can line up customers by using the internet. The working conditions are probable better than a bar, and she has a better chance to score big money.
Mango looked like she would be fun, but I figured she would be a lot more expensive than the bar girls. She was basically no different than a bar girl, so why pay a premium? During the last chat session I told her that her stories did not add up. (With
parents, busy with work, helping a friend.) Mango responded that she forgot to tell me that she went to various places. I sent her an e-mail explaining that I knew about Thai ladies and have not heard from her since. Mango probably figured that
she would not be getting any money from me. I doubt that loss of face had anything to do with it. I decided to give up looking for a "good girl" on the internet. When I visit Thailand on vacation, I will plan on renting a girl when I
feel in the mood. When I am at home, I will focus on life at home. I am not sure what kind of lady I will pursue when I move to Thailand.
The internet girls who are just in it for fun, can be fun to hang out with, but one has to be a bit careful with internet girls for long term relationships.