It started in March 2003 when I was 18 years of age yes, EIGHTEEN and now when I think about this it is mind-boggling for someone of that age to take on. Like most people of that age and younger I was starting to wonder about the world and all the different
countries I would like to visit and my older friends were booking a round the world ticket to Singapore, BANGKOK, Australia, New Zealand and America.
Anyway I was real jealous when my friends were telling me about this and then the strangest thing happened. Call it coincidence or call it fate but my granddad had died a year earlier and left me £5000. I was real happy because I really missed my old granddad and I thought what better way to spend the money than on a round the world trip with my best friends.
I couldn't wait to get there, and once I had paid for my ticket people were telling me about how nice the beaches were in Thailand and how cheap the food was and how cool the parties were on all the sun-kissed islands and all that other exciting stuff. So it came to the day when we were setting off and we jumped on our first flight to Singapore. We were there for a week and couldn't wait to get to Thailand so then we arrive in Bangkok which was OVERWHELMING for an 18 year old who had only ever been on holiday with his mates to Spain before.
We stayed in Bangkok for 1 day and then we went to Koh Samet where I had my first experience with Thai girls. Nobody had ever explained anything to me about Thai girls, about all the bullshit that comes along with them, so when we were in Koh Samet I started to pay attention to these dark skinned, white teethed, slim and gorgeous women and although I didn't sleep with any in Koh Samet it was certainly on my mind.
Well a bit further down the line I had been in Thailand for about 2 months and I was loving every minute of it. Now I had slept with a couple of cute Thai girls without paying (seriously I didn't) and I was still on the prowl for more as they really appealed to me although I never ever thought of having one as my girlfriend.
So by this time it was approaching my 19th birthday and we were in Koh Phi Phi and I just wanted to go out and have fun with my friends. I wasn't even thinking of going for the girls that night, in fact I had gone with a western girl the night before and had some "fun". So on my birthday a fight broke out and it happened to be one of the friends I had left the UK with. His face was covered in blood which got splattered all over my shirt. This is when I met her. She was real worried we would get our asses kicked by the locals and she seemed quite concerned with all the blood that was on my shirt and face so we went to get it all cleaned up. I remember I was saying to her it was TOO loud in the bar and asked if she wanted to go to a quiet place and she agreed so we went off together and I was asking where her room was.
She said "I don't have room, I share with friend".
So I said ok we can go back to my place which we did. She asked how old I was and I lied because she looked older. I said I was 22 and she said she was 26. We went back to my place and we screwed. This is when things changed.
I woke up in the morning still with her next to me, sorry her name is Yai. I can't keep saying "her". As I was saying I woke up in the morning with Yai still with me and we were having a giggle in the morning which was different to the other girls that I had screwed. Usually I screwed them, slept and left in the morning with a quick bye bye, see you later!
But Yai said, "I go take shower, come back later na." So about an hour later I was semi-sleeping with a really bad hangover and I hear a knock at the door and guess who it is? Yes, it's Yai at the door. My friends are all packing their
bags getting ready to leave for Phuket. I was way too ill for Phuket and I wanted to stay with Yai and that is what I did.
Turns out this would be the last time I would see my friends in Thailand and we would meet later in Australia. By this time I had been in Thailand for about 3 months. My friends had gone to Phuket and it was just me and Yai now which I really liked. We were having a ball and we were living together. Oh yeah Yai worked in a Thai massage parlor which I had no clue what went on in and I wasn't even suspicious at the time, so I asked Yai to leave her job and come with me. Yai and me went all over Thailand together and then comes the time I have to leave for Australia.
I was starting to get really worried now and realizing it wasn't long till I had to leave Yai behind in Thailand and I didn't know when I would see her again. I was really upset by this and didn't even want to go to Australia. Well the day came when I had to leave for Australia me and Yai shed a lot of tears in the airport. She was crying so much it made me feel I was lacking in that department. I remember seeing a little kid having a real tantrum and screaming and Yai said, "I feel same him". Then we hugged kissed and said our goodbyes and I was off to Australia.
I got to Australia and was there for about 1 and a half month even though I had a one year work visa and I was supposed to stay for that length of time but I didn't. I didn't want to. I was on the phone to Yai every other day, I had no clue of the things Yai would be getting up to. As far as I was concerned Yai was my girlfriend, when I was in Thailand I did used to ask her if she slept with tourists for money and she was always saying of course not which I believed. So after staying in Australia for 1 and half months I was missing Yai like crazy. When I was in Australia I worked on a farm for most of the time that I was there and earned enough money to get a ticket back to Thailand.
I returned to Koh Phi Phi island where Yai had been waiting for me and things were exactly the same as when I left. She looked real happy to see me and I was probably happier to see her though. While we were having our second time in Koh Phi Phi together me and Yai opened up a bit more and I told her the real truth about my age. I said to her don't be mad when I tell you this but I lied about my age and then I wrote my real age in the sand on the beach. Yai started laughing her head off and confessed that she too had lied to me and she wrote her age in the sand. I was 19 and she was 28! Believe it or not this story is all true. I certainly didn't have any problems with this; later that night Yai opened up even more and said to me she had a 5-year-old child from a previous relationship with a Thai guy and that her daughter lives with her ex-bf in Kao Lak. I was slightly annoyed with this but I had already fallen for Yai so it didn't bother me that much obviously, because I stayed right there with her.
When I returned to Thailand I didn't even give a shit about the rest of my trip. I was just happy to get back to Thailand and be with Yai again. Also for some reason which I can't remember I had some feeling that Yai liked other girls, as in she was a little bi-sexual. Yai denied this for a while because I think she was embarrassed but then it came out and she told me before she moved to Ko Phi Phi she had a 1 month relationship with another girl in Phuket. This is where Yai had learned how to do all her Thai massage skills in a massage parlour there where this girl also worked. I asked her why she fooled around with a girl and she just said because she was sick and tired of getting messed around by men. She told me a lot of stories of the things they get up to but I have never had a threesome as of yet. Oh well, maybe some time in the future. So this time somewhere on my trip Yai took me back to meet the family in Isaan which was a real eye opener for me. I was shocked at how poor she was. I didn't really like it in Isaan the first time I went but I stayed there for about 2 weeks and then it was back to Bangkok for about 1 week and then the dreaded trip back the to the UK. Obviously me and Yai were upset. Very upset.
We both went through it all again, crying, hugging and saying that we wouldn't finish and that I would work my ass off back in Wales and try and return as quickly as possible.
So I got back to Wales and everybody at home had heard all about me and my Thai girlfriend. Some people took the piss, some people were interested and some were very supportive including my parents. Well to be honest my mum wasn't happy about me seeing a Thai girl that was practically 10 years older than me with a child. She wasn't happy but she saw how happy I looked in the pictures and when I was telling my stories and she tried to be happy for me too. My stepdad was real cool about it but most things that I do that are stupid and he just says "your a star lad" which is his way of being behind me which I am happy about.
The usual things carried on at home and Yai and me were still talking on the phone every other day for about 4-5 months and I would send her some money every now and then, not via a bank though, I would just send it in a package with some photos and little gifts. But then she started to change and be cold with me on the phone and not answer it sometimes as well. This went on for about 2 weeks during the whole time I was begging Yai to tell me what was wrong even though in my head I had a good idea about what was going on while Yai was still in Phi Phi.
So after the 2 weeks I said to her what the hell is going on? Do you have a new boyfriend or something? Yes I do have a new boyfriend! UH OH!!! I was relieved that I finally knew what was going on and the guy that she was with was still there with her while I was on the phone to her.
He knew all about me apparently and I was heartbroken, because I knew that he wasn't bothered that she had a relationship with me and he had the better circumstances than me! He was older than her, older than me, had a good job, house, car and life savings which he liked splashing on her and basically a lot more money than me, which everybody reading this knows means he can have a lot more stable relationship and frequent trips to Thailand.
So after he had buggered off back to his own country I could finally start having more honest talks on the phone without his ears listening in on it. He had obviously told Yai that I had no hope of giving her a better life (she told me he said that too) or taking care of her and her family etc etc. I asked why she had done such a terrible thing to me and she was saying you don't understand about everything in Isaan. I haven't old you everything. WHAT NOW I thought? Then she came out and said it. "I have two children not only one”. I didn't even care that she told me this. I just wanted to be with her. This child was even older and was 9 years old and also from a different relationship with a different Thai boyfriend. I explained to her that this didn't bother me and that I still loved her but it started to make sense why she had done the dirty on me and I started to figure out how things in Thailand work. It was a lot to take on board for such a young guy.
I used to beg her on the phone and she wouldn't even hear me out. She didn't want anything to do with me since she had met him, so eventually me and Yai gradually had less and less conversations on the phone and it was down to about twice a month and then down to nothing. We stopped speaking for about 1 month and then it got to Christmas and she phoned me again and we had general chit chat for about an hour and then she came out with it. "I miss you and I want you to come back." I was so happy to hear her say this because all those other talks we were having she was telling me we couldn't be together ever again.
I asked her if she had finished with this other guy and she hadn't, so I said to her that I wouldn't come back so she came out with this little line "I want you for love and him for money". She told me that he had promised to build a house in Isaan for her and that he was sending her 20,000 baht every month and that was why she wouldn't finish with him. Again I was heartbroken by this and though how does a 19 year old compete with that? Obviously I couldn't!
So then I got my ass in gear and started to send her money to prove that I could take care as well, maybe not as good as him but I could still take care of some stuff but I got tired of this and thought why should I have to compete with some guy that has just practically brought a Thai girlfriend. MY THAI GIRL FRIEND. This is how I saw it anyway.
So after a couple more months it was time to return to Thailand for the third time. I was over the moon to be with Yai again but I didn't have a plan. I was just returning to stay for a few months with her and the whole time this guy was phoning
her up every single day just like I used to. He actually thought Yai had finished with me and that we were over for good. How wrong he was. By this time I was enjoying my holiday with Yai and I was also enjoying spending this guy's money
that she would happily share with me and even buy me presents with. So I was there for about 3 – 4 months with her. This time however me and Yai had started to argue and she would sometimes get totally out of it on beer and I would pester her
and ask her a lot of questions about what she had been up to while I was away. By now I was more knowledgeable about Thailand and its woman and this is where I'd developed some paranoia about my relationship with Yai so in the end she broke
down to me in our hotel room.
When she was drunk she admitted that at the beginning of the relationship when I didn't send her any money that she was sleeping with other guys for money, but after when I didn't send her enough or she had spent too quickly she slept with more.
While I was in Wales I asked Yai to tattoo my name as some sort of commitment or proof that this wasn't all a stupid waste of time and a game. She did in fact get the tattoo done just above her pussy. Yai brought this up when she broke down to me and said after she got the tattoo done she was serious about wanting to be with me and only me. She said she stopped going with guys and that she was waiting for me to come back. She also told me her friend said to her there WILL be a time when your boyfriend from Wales won't have sent you any money and you will go with someone else to get that money and she did and that's when she met him.
I was leaving just as he was about to arrive. I wasn't happy about the thought of him coming back and Yai would just tell me don't worry it won't be forever it's just until the house is built then I will finish with him.
So I return back to Wales again but this time it wasn't too bad at the airport because me and Yai had started to form a little pattern and I knew I just have to work and wait in Wales and then I could go back to the house, so after about 6 – 7 months I returned again.
This time it was in November 2004. By now the house was practically finished and what an amazing house it is, really beautiful. I even got to choose the colours and painted it myself. The house was finished inside and out. It was just little touches here and there that needed finishing off like grass laying down and brickwork here and there to keep nosy neighbours' eyes out.
All that time in Wales working and saving and borrowing cash off my folks I had enough money to open a little shop in Koh Phangnan where me and Yai both loved it and had previously had been on holiday. We made some nice friends, farang and Thai. So we took some tips and advice on whereabouts to open, so that's what we did. We found a small shop right on the beach. It was perfect. I got the place all done up by some Thai joiners and the place looked real sweet. Obviously I didn't buy the building, we were just renting it in Yai's name, and then we opened our first Thai massage parlour together. All the time this guy is still phoning up and he returned roughly every 3-4 months, staying about 2 weeks at a time.
It didn't bother me too much because I knew/know she doesn't love this old guy no matter what anybody reading this might think, not that it particularly bothers me what some of the sad old guys here think and no matter how long they have been going to Thailand for! <It didn't bother you that he was boning "your" woman? – Stick>
So we were having a ball in our shop most of the time and we were reasonably busy to stay open and have enough left for some luxuries (mostly beer and fancy restaurants). We had Yai's sister come and work for us, not particularly sexy but the rest of the girls were and there used to be a lot of arguments about me and I couldn't believe some of the lies they told Yai. Her sister was and is coo.l she was ok, no problem with her at all but the rest of them would say how I was always looking at them and grabbing them while we were out in the bars. I was shocked how they could just straight up lie like this but Yai didn't believe them because Yai's sister and me were quite close and she would be on my side and say it was bullshit (which it was).
So when it was his turn to be come back to Thailand I just stuck around the shop and took care of things until Yai returned. Then it came to Christmas time 2004 and we all know what tragedy happened in Thailand on Boxing Day 2004 and guess where Yai's little girl lived? Kao Lak which is one of the worst places the Tsunami hit in Thailand. We were worried out of our minds and had to go to Koh Lak ASAP. We got there to discover Yai's little girl was fine but her ex boyfriend has not been seen since it happened and we have still had no word about that so we can only presume that he is dead.
At home in Wales this time I have had a bit of a rough time. Remember I'm still growing and learning not like most of the guys reading this story and my emotions/hormones have been up and down like a rollercoaster. Since I met Yai I have always smoked weed, even before I knew her, but all the stress and heartbreak this time got the better of me and for about 5 – 6 months I have been smoking weed day in day out and not even bothering saving any money to go back and I only sent her money the one time on her 31st birthday along with a necklace.
I was getting really, really depressed from smoking all this weed and still missing Yai every single day and still talking on the phone too. I had started to doubt my relationship with Yai and I told her this too and felt she was getting the better out of this, but Yai changed my mind by telling me if she wasn't serious about me then what the hell does she need me for? She went on and said she could just leave to her other BF's home country anytime. I know he can definitely afford it but she tells him she can't go because of her kids which is probably true but I also know it's because she's waiting for me and also she fears him because of his aggressive nature and moody attitude.
Yai saying this to me has made me change. I just thought to myself I have to stop smoking this shit and get myself back to Thailand. Since then I have stopped smoking weed, cigarettes and any other hard drugs too for that matter. I have even started to exercise frequently, running, weights and hopefully pretty soon starting Muay Thai/Thai Boxing. I feel much better about myself and my situation now. Without Yai I would have never done those things
Yai knew I liked to smoke pot a lot and she knew I was smoking it at home in Wales, just like she likes to drink, I liked to smoke. But now it's over and I will never touch it again. Right now my priority is Yai and being with Yai and planning out my future and how I'm going to do it all. She knows I have stopped smoking and she has also cut right down on the drinking
I am soon to go back to college and do a course in joinery/carpentry and I AM going to be with Yai even if it is not going to be right away and maybe not even forever but right now in my life that is what I want. I will be going back to see her in February, hopefully for a few months because all the colleges round my area are too full to get on the joinery course so I will just have to wait and persist. Persistence is the key. I have gone through this for nearly three years now. It feels like a lifetime to me and I have grown A LOT over the course of those three years. I will not stop with this until I have got what I want out of it or until my heart changes its mind, but as for the fact of the other guy coming and going, it doesn't bother me too much because I know he is just like the many, many, many people on this site that are getting ripped off and are willing to believe that money can buy them love. <Mate, you need to open your eyes. I think you are the one who is getting ripped off. You're wasting some of the best years of your life fantasising about a dream that may never happen – Stick>
No matter how much money you throw at these girls it won't make them fall in love with you, this twat has blown millions of baht on the house, car, motorbike and holidays for Yai and she isn't in love with him. Me however, yeah I have given Yai quite a lot of money too but that's not what she wants from me, I'm a loveable guy, believe it or not. I can see that I make her happy. I get on really well with most of her family and I really love both of her kids and they are real fond of me too, I sometimes talk to them on the phone and I can see they are happy when ever I go back to Thailand
I have asked the kids if they like the third party and the answer is no. My girlfriend and her two kids call him the ladyboy when they talk about him because they think he walks like one and they generally don't like him. They say he is moody and doesn't like or want the rest of the family in HIS house. Come on man get a grip, how can anyone have a Thai girlfriend and try and exclude their family? That's a definite no no.
Me and Yai are still in contact and I have no intention of finishing with her anytime soon. This other guy still comes back every 3-4 months and stays 2 week then he heads back home again and sends my girlfriend lots of lovely money. MONEY MONEY MONEY, SOMETHING FUNNY IN A THAI GIRL'S WORLD!!!!!!!
She now has a house, car and motorbike all thanks to this guy of course. I give my girlfriend money too but I know what his money goes on which is mostly bills and paying off the car and motorbike so I have no problem sending money to her because it's not busting my bank up too badly. A lot of you reading this will probably think that I have no chance of getting rid of this other guy now and maybe you're right. After all, me and Yai have known each other nearly 3 years and he has been on the scene for about 17-18 months of that so we will just have to see how the cookie crumbles.
I have learned so much from this website and I hope some people can learn from my story, even all the old Thai veterans. Don't think that your girlfriend isn't cheating on you because it can easily be done, just like this guy has no clue at all what is going on. It could be one of you lot.
Hope all you guys liked my story I have been meaning to write it for so long and I have just written it all out tonight to get it off my chest, you might be able to tell story telling isn't my best point nor is grammar or spelling but hopefully Stick will have helped me out a little with that. And also my good friend who I met from this site kahuna2004 (Thanks guys), and thanks to everybody that ready my story.
I hope everybody can learn from this, I don't know what exactly but learn something.
You're in really deep and I fear the outcome may not be favourable.