Stickman Readers' Submissions May 3rd, 2004

An Assault On The Senses



Having been through a difficult time during the past 4 years or so, I finally made up my mind to visit Thailand back in March of this year. It had been a long process making up my mind to go there. My confidence and sanity had been knocked out of me by an appalling level of betrayal and manipulation; by someone who I truly loved and adored. Obviously maybe too much.

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I had read on the internet and elsewhere about Thailand and I can clearly remember being in Istanbul in 1977 talking to a Kiwi who said that Thai women were 'just made for loving' and 'as long as you looked after them and treated them with respect' then you would have a fantastic time.

Trawling the internet one long doubting night, I came across a site which advertised trips to Thailand from the UK, which included, flight, hotel and an 'escort' for the duration of the holiday with the proviso that if you didn't like your escort then you could change her. This site said that it was ideal for men who were shy, lacked confidence etc etc etc. Also, and rather optimistically, this site said that the experience you had would change your life! So……..in a moment of 'Gung Ho'-ness, I contacted the people, made further enquiries, handed over the money and duly got on a Thai Airways flight to Bangkok on March 14th.

Arriving at Bangkok International airport the next day very early in the morning after a good flight [in fact the best flight I have ever had, was this going to be the portent of things to come?] I was met and chauffeured in a limo [well, sort of a limo] to Pattaya and my hotel. My first impression of the hotel was that it was fine, not great, a standard 2-3 star. However, my impression would soon change as I found the hotel in fact to be very good with wonderful staff and a great atmosphere. I tried to rest for a couple of hours, but being rather jet lagged and excited I contacted the person who was going to introduce me to my 'escort' and asked that we first have some food and then meet her. He took me to a bar / cafe called Kiss and I had a great Thai breakfast, the heat and the spices and the tastes awakening my senses and half succeeding in pushing back the waves of jet lag.

I have here to emphasize that prior to deciding that I would visit Thailand I had thoroughly read and re-read emails on your site, so although a Thai virgin I was also carrying round a large 'pinch of salt' on both of my shoulders.

So we met at my hotel. Prior to arriving in Thailand I had been asked what sort of woman I would like. Duly replying, I was intrigued and excited to meet my escort. Well, she arrived. Her name was Annuri and although she sort of met my request physically, I had asked that she speak some English, as although I speak several European languages, I have no knowledge of oriental ones and I felt that if I was going to spend two weeks with someone then there needed to be some level of communication other than the 'beast with two backs'. At that moment in time I thought that she had a very pleasant personality, full of 'Wais and smiles…….' So, after being left alone with her for some time we went to my room. Her knowledge of English appeared poor, although when necessary it would suddenly get better. Anyway, we went out to dinner at a restaurant called Vientianne. Oh what food, oh what tastes, but why was I feeling that I was getting more attention from the dead fish on my plate than from my concubine? Thinking that I had made a mistake, but also feeling that maybe this was the 'shyness' [pretend or otherwise] I had so often read about, I decided that maybe it was me, too jet lagged, expecting too much. So later we went back to the hotel. After much prevaricating, and being rebuffed I felt too tired to continue any sort of advance and decided to retire for the night. So, Annuri went for the obligatory shower, and lights out she entered my bed dressed in clothes more suitable for winter's day in England than in a tropical climate. Ho, Ho. Three T shirts, bra, trousers. Got to laugh. Anyway, I went to sleep, laughing to myself, feeling her next to me lying rigid like a plank. I thought to myself, I am not great looking, but I am not ugly; I am 46, but fit, not fat and I like people and I try to respect people. Anyway, so to sleep. Awaking some hours later to a still rigid body lying next to me, I made an advance which was met with nothing. Nothing being the rebuff. Being ignored, except by a rigid body is worse than being told 'I don't want to have sex with you'. Sort of felt a bit insulted and duped. So, on went the lights, out came my loyal Thai / English phrase book and I asked her what was wrong. She understood, and then she said 'Naked' and pointed at me. She then went to the bathroom and came back…..fully dressed. I went back to sleep but awoke to the not so gentle prodding of a fully clothed, dressed for the Antarctic Thai ice cube. Sort of guessing that she might want me to take her clothes off I started to do this. Reluctantly she let me undress her and we had a sort of sterile sex. As soon as it was over, she went back to the bathroom and got dressed again, ready for another venture into the blizzard of my bed. Never mind, I went back to sleep. It was now about 0430 and suddenly the TV went on, full blast, and I mean full blast. Then she started bouncing up and down on the bed, the lights went on and she started 'chomping' on a bag of crisps. I really mean chomping. Soooooo, still being jet lagged and trying not to believe that I had journeyed into a hell I asked her nicely to desist. She ignored me, so I raised my voice. I never raise my voice; I try not to. She then started to sulk, but I had to go back to sleep.

Next morning, sulking continuing, flouncing being the next move, I tried to explain to her why I was feeling bad, and said that perhaps we should start all over again and go and have some breakfast, then go for a walk, maybe she'd like to show me round? Okayyyy, better reaction. So we went for breakfast. Great Thai food again, and Boy! are you guys right, the Thais just eat and eat, but fine. After breakfast I suggested that we go for a walk in the direction of the beach. So we started but went via a department store and she went directly to a clothes stall and it was obvious that she wanted me to buy her some clothes….on my refusal she sulked, again, and at the moment in time I decided that when we went back to the hotel I would telephone and ask for her to be changed. On the way back to the hotel via several other shops, 'I want a pair of trainers' I want you to hire a 4 X 4 etc etc, this was turning into a nightmare of Macbeth proportions. So back at the hotel I telephoned, but no answer. Thinking it's too early, I decided to go for a swim. Miss Annuri did not want to follow me, just wanted to stay in the room and hit room service and as I found out later the telephone. Returning some time later I telephoned and asked for her to be removed which was very professionally done and Miss Annuri left very shortly afterwards with a smirk on her face. I was offered a new women and I arranged to go to a bar later that evening. Feeling relieved, and also with a real sense of freedom I almost hopped around the room with joy, went for a swim and slept for a few hours.

Awaking refreshed and feeling good I showered, made myself look good and went for a walk. By now it was about 8pm, the night was hot and sultry, the smells on the street were great [ok, unless you walked over a drain] and I was enjoying just walking around, looking at the sights, the bars, the activities, the fun, the scowls, the blankness of some of the Wais, the sincerity and fun of others. Arriving some time later at this bar I was offered anyone I liked. I spent the next couple of hours consuming too much Singha, but having a great time and I left with a bar girl, much closer to my age. [She was 38] I had a great time that night, full of passion, fun, laughs and giggles. Although An spoke very little English we seemed to click and we had a great time. She stayed with me for the next 3 nights. I then decided that I wanted a break from her, needed to be by myself and wanted to do some travelling to Bangkok and also to Kanchanaburi [River Kwai]. I will write to you again about my experiences on my trips, but now I want to continue with my ramblings about the bargirls.

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So I returned about 4 days later about 7pm and after a quick shower decided that I just wanted to go out and have a few drinks and a few flirts and some conversation and not meet up with An. So off I went into the night. I did not go far. I stopped off at a bar, not really busy, an outside bar, where lots of tourists pass, not on the main drag, but with an atmosphere of fun. So, this is where my experiences really start. I consumed too many beers. I have to explain here that in the UK, I do not normally drink; having had a bitter experience of an alcoholic girlfriend, I do not enjoy drinking at home, so more than two beers has a 'lying down' effect on me.

Playing the obligatory tic-tac-toe etc I found that I was having a great time. Some of the girls were beautiful, some of them less so, but after a while, me the person with his confidence raped from his mind, me the person oh, so cautious, me the person who had until quite recently felt that he wasn't worth much, was up 'pole dancing' and having a great time. My pole dancing was no doubt grotesque, but seemed to be actively encouraged by all and sundry, not only the girls but in particular the drop dead gorgeous Mamasan. I left alone that night, not for the want of offers [oh, what a boost this was!], but I just wanted to saviour my tentative rebirth.

OK, next night I returned to this bar. Although I had received a telephone call from the organiser of my 'escorted' trip to Thailand I actually felt better under my own steam. Again I had a brilliant time, watered, fed, amused, flirted with. I barfined one of the girls; the Mamasan said that she 'wanted' to go with me, but couldn't as she was the girlfriend of the owner who was present. Never mind, pinch of salt and all that. Again ,a great night of passion, but I had made it clear that the barfine was only for the night. No problems I thought, but on my return to the bar the next night, any conversation I had with any of the other bargirls led to icy stares from the girl who had stayed with me the previous night. I didn't barfine anyone else that night, felt it prudent not to do so . The next night the atmosphere between me and the girl I had slept with was more than icy. Also, she was starting to rubbish the other girls to the Mamasan and to the owner, to such an extent that I spoke to the owner who then spoke to everybody and suddenly the atmosphere was ok again.

Then there was Mons. One piece of advice I totally retained in my head was not to fall in love with a bargirl. So, I sort of did a compromise and did not barfine this girl, but I did fall in love with her. Nothing ever happened between us, except talking and perhaps some mutual admiration, but her beauty and personality was such that I could not help but fall in love with her. Let me describe her to you. The girl of your dreams, whatever your dreams and your fantasies are. Not just looks, but personality and a gorgeous voice. Having spent some days looking at eachother, she came up to me one night and just said 'I want you'…… and she gave me such a warm hug, my heart melted. I told her that I couldn't, I did not tell her that I couldn't because I would fall in love with her, that she was dangerous, that she would finally heat my heart to incandescence. I just smiled. Anyway, she took no offence, but every night I saw her. I would barfine other girls, she likewise would wonder off into the night with Tom, Dick or Harry. I have no plans for Mons, except in my memories and in my thoughts.

Mons took no offence; she always fed me. Even grasshoppers and she would join in my happiness, my laughs and my joy. Everything between us was understood, you know, that knowing glance, that movie script, that smile, that laugh, that all encompassing intangible something, that cannot really be expressed only perhaps by saying:

'Sometimes I want to be with you so much it hurts not to be, Other times I am just fed up with what you are doing to me……..'

So I returned to England after an amazing 2 weeks. I cannot say that I had a bad experience, all my experiences were very good, or just less good. My time with Annuri now makes me chuckle. You know when you go on holiday, you say that 'ok, this was a nice place, and maybe one day I will return, but there are so many other places to visit'……, Thailand has had a profound experience on my thoughts and life I am going back soon. I left out quite a bit, and I will write again about my travels and food, and food and food and travels and my soul which has been reborn. I must emphasize that my rebirth is only in part due to my bargirl experiences, other parts of my travel are just if not more important, so I will write again.

Finally, for now, I do recommend for those who are shy, unconfident, going through an agency. Bit expensive though, but the service was good. Hotel I stayed in was Hotel Opey de Place.

More stories to follow.

Stickman says:

Interesting that these services still operate. Authorities have been cracking down on them in the western world and Thailand is strongly opposed to any such organisations.


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