Readers' Submissions

More Observations

  • Written by Upena
  • August 21st, 2003
  • 4 min read




1. The Pah Yen (cold little towels at the beer bars) have to be one of the greatest inventions known to man.

2. More girls seems to enjoy shaving and I’m not talking about underarms or legs.

3. Slipping on a wet tile floor and falling on my butt in the hotel lobby and then returning 2 hours later to see the “slippery when wet” plastic sign up seemed to be appropriate.

4. Still amazes me at how many girls remember me from 2 or 3 years ago even if only after one encounter. They know my name, where I am from and in some cases other information that even I had forgotten. Amazing.

5. For 5 days I see a commercial on Pattaya TV for a restaurant (Steak Bao) demonstrating how to make their 3 meat grill (chicken, pork and beef) in their special sauce. I finally make it to the restaurant and lo and behold – the item is not on the regular menu nor on the “TV Special” menu. I ask the waitress, the waiter, the manager, the bartender (in Thai) and no one has a clue as to what I am trying to order. Have to settle for BBQ chicken. Never went back.

6. Going to the local pharmacist for a minor illness instead of waiting to see a doctor only to get the same mediation from the pharmacy later is one of many things I like about Thailand. And being able to buy only the amount of medication required instead of mega-doses only makes sense.

7. Asia Book's store on Sukhumvit and Soi 15/17 remains my favorite for over 30 years.

8. The “wai” is a forgotten art form.

9. Pratunam is still a great place to shop.

10. Thai time still remains the same. A 1200 appointment means sometime around 1330.

11. Madrid Lounge is the only bar on Patpong that has the same name, interior decorations and menu as 30 years ago.

12. Lam Morrison is THE best guitarist in Thailand (Blues Factory – Walking Street) – and may be worthy of higher accolades. He only plays two nights a week and every Wednesday and Sunday I was in Pattaya, I was there to listen to the rock ‘n’ roll.

13. Watching the show in the Nana Hotel parking lot at 0200 from a nearby bar stool is truly entertaining.

14. Thermae no longer has any appeal with a 0200 closing.

15. Who is more annoying – the guys that sit in front of tailor shops, the girls that hawk foot massages, tuk-tuk drivers touting massage parlours (like I can’t find one on my own), or the “salesmen” at the beer bars? This list could be endless.

16. Trink (Nite Owl columnist at Bangkok Post) is a shadow of his former self. His columns are primarily about internet scams, internet jokes, and Lou Boyd witticisms. It used to be about bars, massage parlours (with numbers and ratings) and eateries.

17. Having to pay to piss, pisses me off.

18. Chicken Kebab sandwiches in Pattaya at 50 Baht are a really good deal.

19. A girl dances nude on stage (or topless) and then in the hotel room has to wrap herself in a towel and turn out the lights – because she is – SHY???

20. The list of bars to visit at the beginning of the trip soon winds up being the list of bars to avoid at the end of the trip.

21. Why does it cost 1500 baht to go from Bangkok to Pattaya and 800 baht to go from Pattaya to Bangkok?

22. While on vacation in Thailand – phones, email, internet, and news are not important at all.

23. I like to pay the bar fine early on – say around 9 or 10 PM…and then go out drinking with a return at about 0100. But….I have found that usually I find someone that I wish I could take out but then I would forfeit the bar fine that I paid earlier…..oh well…there is always tomorrow.

24. You never lose your girlfriend…You just lose your turn.

25. You don’t pay for sex. You pay the girl to leave.

26. Thai girls seem to love to bury their noses in my armpit and sniff and say “hom” (smells good). I have yet to figure this one out. I do wear a deodorant – but nothing special and no cologne. I never know that my armpits smelled so good!

27. It is easier to lie than tell the truth to the Thai girls. They seem to believe lies easier than reality.

28. The crackdown on methamphetamines *yah baa’ seems to have worked….most of the girls don’t seem strung out like 2 years ago.

29. “we are the cheeky girls” has replaced “Boom boom boom boom” as the ,most popular techno/pop song.

30. Thai chrome pole huggers still need to learn to dance. I understand that they have 15 minute shifts every hour for 7-12 hours and need to conserve their energy. Anyone doing more than the Thailand two-step is a notch-up in my books.

Stickman says:

Nice observations.