Stickman's Weekly Column April 16th, 2017

B’s Inflated Manhood

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The idea of going under the knife petrifies me.  I do everything I can to stay healthy and avoid it.  I struggle to get my head around how some people actually choose to go under the knife to improve their looks.  Even something as simple as a nose job or a facelift fills me with dread.  Some people tell me I am old-fashioned and going under the knife to change the way you look is no longer uncommon.  And I am told that more men are going to see a doc about penis enlargement.  In the city sex-obsessed Westerners flock to you can now get manhood enlarged surgically.  I ventured along to the recently opened BigHeClinic to find out more.

BigHeClinic recently opened in a prime position on upmarket Soi Thonglor, just a short walk up from Sukhumvit Road.  It is the vision of some Bangkok-based expats in collaboration with a French plastic surgeon. The concept is to create a chain of clinics in Bangkok catering specifically for men’s issues.  Think hair loss, diminishing libido, erectile dysfunction….those sorts of things.

But what they hope to become best known for is their penis enlargement procedure pioneered by French plastic surgeon, Dr. Richard Diacakis.  The penis enlargement procedures are overseen by the renowned French plastic surgeon whose area of specialty includes penoplasty, and are carried out by a young Thai doctor.

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I met up with a well-known Bangkok expat who I will refer to as B who had the procedure done.  We talked about why he chose to get it done, what the procedure was like and the part that I wondered most about, how his manhood functioned afterwards.

Talking to another man about his manhood is about the last thing I want to talk about, but in the context of this story it is necessary.  The things I do for this column, eh?!  B claims that he always had length, but what he really wanted was girth.  B had something of a thing about sex and a fixation on his manhood, almost like it was a big part of what made him who he was.  He was desperate to fix what he considered to be an issue – a lack of girth.

B made an appointment at BigHeClinic and before he knew it his drawers were around his ankles and another man’s hands were around his penis.  There is almost zero preparation required before the procedure.  There is no need to refrain from food beforehand, and presumably B could have dropped by Lolita’s before swinging by, if he had so desired.

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The doctor asked B to wash his penis and to changed into a robe.  B took a seat and that’s when he admits to a little anxiety.  Some cream was applied to the base of his penis and he was told to wait.  20 minutes later the doc returns.  B’s penis now feels numb and the doc starts the simple procedure.  B says he felt nothing.  Is that the same thing ladies had previously said to him that prompted him to go to BigHeClinc in the first place, I wondered.  30 minutes later it was over and the rest is sexual history.

There is no pre-op check.  There is no need for blood work to be done first or any of the usual pre-operation procedures.  It is simply a case of turning up at the clinic and getting it done.

The procedure involves injecting Hyaluronic acid in to the penis.  I am told this is a natural enzyme produced by our body and the same product many doctors use for procedures that involve the face.  A small grid is drawn on the penis and an injection is made in each square on the grid.  This acid effectively increases the size of the penis.

One of the things that sold B on getting the procedure done was that he was told he would have better control during sex.  I can’t get my head around this and in the absence of a more detailed response, I wonder if this is due to decreased sensitivity.

There is no need to spend time recovering in the clinic and you can be out as soon as you came in.  A little antiseptic cream on a gauze bandage wrapped around the shaft and that’s it.  As a precaution antibiotics are prescribed.  Patients are told not to have sex for a week.  That’s it!

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Asking B how his penis felt afterwards, he responded that when he had to go for a pee he could not believe he was holding his own penis.  He said he felt like a new man.  B said that it felt normal, it was just that it was much bigger.  He seemed genuinely happy about it.  It sounds more like a scene from a horror movie to me.  The swelling subsided after 10 days but the penis itself was still much larger than it had been prior to visiting the clinic.

The effects of the procedure are said to last around 18 months, at which point they can be repeated.  Nice business model that, I reckon – which birds used to super-size are going to be happy going back to the standard size?!

B claims both his and his girlfriend’s sex lives have improved and he feels he can go longer, extending their lovemaking sessions from 3 to 4 minutes to well over 10.

B says he is now more confident, not just in bed but in all of the things he does and his only regret is that he wishes he had done it sooner.  Any shrinks care to comment?!

The penis enlargement procedure costs around 75K baht but the final price depends on how much filler they use.

There’s something about merely considering the idea of pursuing penis enlargement that strikes me as, well, for want of a better word, braggadocious.  But then we’re talking about Bangkok and the disproportionately high percentage of foreign men who are fixated on sex, their penis and all things sexual so I guess I should not be all that surprised.  In a city where many so-called straight guys have sex with ladyboys in Bangkok – something I bet most had never previously considered before arriving in Thailand – I guess going to a clinic for a penis enlargement procedure is hardly a big deal.  A small prick on your manhood or a big prick up your ass, penis enlargement is no big deal in the context of Bangkok, is it?

I can’t imagine any circumstances under which I’d consider the idea of penis enlargement.  Just talking with B about the procedure made me feel a little queasy but even if someone came along with a non-surgical procedure, I wouldn’t be interested.  Don’t mess with Mother Nature, I say.  But we’re talking about Bangkok where a lot of guys are obsessed with sex and penis size and a lot of really crazy stuff goes on.  For those of you want to get your penis enlarged, you can get it done right now in downtown Bangkok at BigHeClinic in Soi Thonglor….if you dare!

 

Note:  In the interests of full disclosure, BigHeClinic is a paid advertiser of this website.  You can find out more about HE Clinic at their YouTube channel.

 

 

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Where Was This Photo Taken?

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Last week’s photo was taken inside the Red Oven Restaurant, located on the 7th floor of the Sofitel So Bangkok Hotel.  The background of the photo showed Lumpini Park and buildings in the Sarasin area.

 

Stick’s Inbox – (The best emails from readers received this past week.)

Kiss the tush!

I went in to Mandarin Nana Plaza many times over the years and never could figure out the heart-shaped holes in those little bench seats either.  Finally I took a good friend from Pattaya and he figured it out in an instant.  You place the girl on top of the hole then lay on your back underneath on the floor with your face directly under her.  Kiss the Tush is what he named it.  He demonstrated this many times over with numerous girls that night and what great fun it was.  Oh, yes, them steps are killers especially when leaving and gravity is the enemy.  Nothing to do with the drink being involved!

To Facebook, or not to Facebook.

It is good to know that you’re on Facebook now.  But in my humble opinion, you really don’t need a social media presence in order to engage your readers.  That might be rather counterproductive in some ways.  It is a lot more convenient to write you emails directly instead of posting thoughts publicly on Facebook.  The entire “Stick’s Inbox” section and many of the most interesting readers’ submissions are published as “anonymous”; and I believe this is the most comfortable arrangement for many people.  As a regular reader, I don’t mind sharing my observations about Bangkok nightlife with you, and with my fellow readers, but I wouldn’t consider it as something to brag about publicly in the hope of a few “likes” and comments.

Not everyone uses Facebook.

I would never be able to contact you if you used Facebook as the means for contact.  I closed my Facebook account years ago because I got tired of receiving useless messages from it.  If I access Facebook any time in the future my account is automatically reactivated.  As a result I tell people who send me stuff referring me to Facebook that I am just not interested in seeing what they sent.  Interestingly, this just happened to me today.  I agree with your attitude towards social media.

AirBnB, Singapore.

While not Thailand, you may find the Singapore AirBNB story interesting.  On 8th February a law was passed in Singapore making short-term condo rentals illegal.  By law, any rental agreement must be for a minimum of 6 months.  It was only a few days later there was a note in the mailbox from the management of our Singapore condo highlighting this, and asking all condo owners to be “viligant” and to report to the condo management anyone suspected of being short-term guests, and they would immediately contact the police and ensure both the short-term stayers and the condo owner were rightly prosecuted.  I went on to AirBNB and checked our condo building to see if there were any AirBNB units.  There were 6.  This was around mid-February.  Now, a couple of months later, there is NONE.  All gone.  Our condo building appears to be 100% AirBNB free.  There are still condo units available elsewhere in Singapore on AirBNB but the question is for how long?  With its tough laws, tough penalties, and authorities who administer them, it really does look like it is the end of business for AirBNB in Singapore.  Amazing.

A new era for Sin City?

There is news that a casino will open in Pattaya.  I am not 100% sure whether this is an April Fool’s Day joke or not but a Pattaya website has a number of articles about plans regarding a casino in Pattaya.  Could this really be true, even though I could not find confirmation anywhere else?  If true, it would bring a lot of change to the place.  The demand for high-class rooms would soar.  The news is that it may be built on Walking Street, but that cannot be the best option.  Building the first (legal) casino in Thailand with less than a few hundred tables and a few thousand slots would be a wasted opportunity.  There is simply not enough space for a building of this size in the Walking Street area. What comes to mind are one or two plots of land between Beach Road and Second Street that are not developed, yet.  One is next to the Central Shopping Mall and the Hilton.  They would have about the required minimum size.  A typical resort casino would not only host a huge casino but also a luxury shopping mall, some restaurants and 10 to 20 levels for a new five-star hotel.  This would be the start of a new area for the city.

The public has now become the police force.

A new law was introduced this past week which meant fines for passenger-carrying vans having more than 13 seats (down from 17), and on the very first day one (one!) was caught out and a fine and 15-day driving ban issued.  But the police only tackled this one because someone posted it on the internet.  Otherwise it would have been business as usual with no-one caught by the blind enforcement officers.  Social media = no hiding place anymore.  And = the police actually having to work now and then, after someone else has sought out the lawbreakers.  Far too hard for the police to do that.  It might help if they actually got out on the streets and looked for lawbreakers, but in my 25 years in Thailand I have never, even once, seen police out on foot patrol ready to serve and help the public and uphold the law.  The public has now become the police force finding the lawbreakers, with the actual police only doing the paperwork.

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Girl Of The Week

Kao Fang, gogo dancer at Dollhouse, Soi Cowboy.
She hails from Roi Et and is 23 years old.
Kao Fang has been described as crazy fun, and loves to have a good time.

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Photos kindly supplied by Dave The Rave

There’s not a lot to report from the trenches this week, it being Songkran and all of that.  A couple of pissed off people sent emails expressing their displeasure at being blasted with water guns on Tuesday, a full two days before Songkran officially started.  Whether you like Songkran or not, that seems like a reasonable gripe to me.

Conventional Asia expat wisdom says that the Thailand bar industry is not the best hunting ground for a good wife.  I would agree with that.  There are exceptions to every rule, of course.  What little I saw of the bars in Vietnam I think the ladies there would be even worse choices for a life partner than a Thai barlady. The few I came across were hard and you got the feeling that whomever came on their radar they would try to bleed for every last dollar.  With all of this said, I hear word that the ladies in some of the bars in Cambodia are there for the same reason a lot of Thai women gravitated towards the bars in the distant past – because they were looking for a foreigner husband and did not know where else to go.  I am not saying that if you want to marry a Cambodian that you should look in the bars of Phnom Penh or Sihanoukville, but that if things do develop between you and a lady you meet there you might just find someone who there is a chance with.  I’d still say to make sure you proceed with caution and your eyes wide-open!

I don’t want to sound like a spoil sport and I can see the benefits of using Airbnb – I have yet to use it myself but no doubt will do so before too long – but I really can see why many condo owners don’t like the concept.  The place I stayed long-term in Bangkok rented rooms both long-term and short-term.  While most of us resident in the building were on long-term contracts, there were always a few short-stay visitors – and they were the clichéd short-term Bangkok visitors of that time, coming and going with guests at all hours and making enough noise to make you rise from your slumber in the middle of the night.

Before I moved to Thailand I distinctly remember many products sold in New Zealand as being made in Thailand.  The things that come to mind are cheap, canned food products like tuna, fruit salad, cat food and dog food.  There were various other items though what they were slip my mind.  I do distinctly remember thinking that it seemed like a disproportionately high number of items seemed to be manufactured in Thailand.  That has all changed and it’s not that often I see the made in Thailand label on much at all sold in New Zealand these days.  It would appear Made in Thailand has been replaced with Made in Vietnam – where so much stuff seems to come from, from said canned tuna to quality furniture.  I guess part of it is that Thailand has moved on and where once it was canned tuna, now it is washing machines, hard drives and car assembly.  At the same time, Thailand does seem to have lost out on the manufacture of a lot of goods to neighbouring countries and I guess probably the cost of labour in Thailand where the minimum wage has doubled in the last 10 years is a major factor.

What is it with Thais ordering food and before they even taste it they smother it in sauce or ground dried chillies or sugar or whatever condiments are on the table – even in the case where they don’t know what those condiments taste like!  I see this all the time and it doesn’t matter whether what they’re eating is Thai or foreign, they almost feel a need to douse it with whatever is on the table.  And they are not shy to criticise the taste if it is not how they expect it, notwithstanding that they didn’t taste it first before adding to it.  Absolutely infuriating behaviour and something I have observed with so many Thais, particularly Thai females!

 

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Quote of the week comes from the Prime Minister of Thailand, “Thais believe too easily – don’t trust anything before checking otherwise you will be cheated.”

Reader’s story of the week comes from Walrus, “A Brand New Plan“.

A British benefit cheat pockets 100,000 pounds while living the life in Thailand!

A female backpacker in Thailand is above Thai and puts her feet up on the headrest of a bus next to a Thai man’s head, and refuses requests to take them down.

Westerners in South-East Asia are begging to fund their travels in the region.

Over a thousand Thais scammed by a fellow countryman turn up at the airport for a trip to Japan which never happens.

A Vice.com reporter has a night out with the Foreign Police volunteers in Pattaya.

A Brit is killed after he falls naked from a guesthouse and lands outside a Pattaya gogo bar.

Bangkok street food is voted the world’s best but the Thai government wants to shut street food vendors down!

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Ask Sunbelt Legal

Unfortunately there were no questions received for Sunbelt Legal this week so this section of the column is empty.

 

 

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Songkran on Sukhumvit Road, from the Stickman archives.

 

Songkran coinciding with Easter makes this an even quieter time of year than usual for the sorts of things I cover and write about.  Not a lot has been going on in the bars and as such the bar industry and general expat community news section is very light this week.  Probably it will be much the same next week too as bar staff spend time with family upcountry until their funds get low and they are forced to return to Bangkok to make money.  Things don’t usually return to regular levels for a couple of weeks or so and then we’re getting in to May, one of the quietest months of the year.  As always I will endeavour to cover everything going on in the bars but it might be that there are a few light columns to come.  No, I am not being a slacker and neglecting my duties in case you were wondering!

 

Your Bangkok commentator,

Stick

 

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