Take Care, Stick
I arrived in Bangkok for the weekend in 2009 while teaching in an international school in Malaysia. I soon discovered that Malaysia was boring and Thailand was amazing! I was 60 years old and was in awe of old farangs walking around with young Thai girls in tow. I needed to discover more and spent many weekends over the next year.
I was like a kid in a candy shop and made the usual rookie mistakes. It did not matter much as I had my indexed pension from Canada and a full-time salary from Malaysia. Money was not an issue, and I stayed at the Westin and Sheraton across the street.
I fell for the first Thai lady I met at Shebas on Soi Cowboy and quit my job in Malaysia and moved into a condo on Asoke, just a short walk from Sukhumvit. I had expat friends teaching in international schools in Bangkok so the best of both worlds was available. The Thai lady moved in with me, and we had a good year but we both decided to move on as I wanted to explore, and she wanted to revisit a past Thai flame that was doing well financially in Udon Thani.
Then began my life as a player in Bangkok bars. Two girls on Friday and 2 girls on Saturday. The second love in my life was coaching basketball, and I secured a coaching job in a Thai international school. Life was good and I had a few ladies that I enjoyed having dinner with and playing pool.
However, the best-laid plans can crumble, and I met a 27-year-old lady in a bar while I was out for a walk one night. She broke all my rules as she did not speak any English and was a nooby, having just arrived in Bangkok that week. I bought her a few drinks and headed home by myself. Over the next week I visited that bar a few times and treated her to a good time in Bangkok with nights in Hillary 2 and visits to gogo bars. However, no boom boom (that did not last long). She just made me laugh.
To this day, 14 years later, she still makes me laugh, as we raise our 11-year -old son and live in Canada. So, yes, there is success with a bargirl if you catch them early and are willing to put in the time to educate them and develop trust.
This October, to celebrate my 75th birthday I took a solo trip to Bangkok and discovered that, like Stickman, Thailand no longer appeals to me. Bangkok has moved on, and not for the better, and so have I. IMHO smart phones and social media have changed Thais and educated them where their school system failed them. Unfortunately, social media tends to warp what they learn. They view life in terms or dollars procured and are frankly boring to talk with.
There are some stunning ladies walking around with middle-aged or younger farangs and I suspect they are meeting online rather than dancing or working a beer bar. I know, given a choice, I would market myself rather than leave it up to some old mamasan so I understand them. Gone are the days when I used to see a lovely young lady sitting side saddle on a motorbike with a straight back and ponytail blowing in the wind. Also gone are the massage ladies yelling handsome man, where you go? Nowadays they have their eyes glued to their smart phone.
This coming March I will visit Thailand again, this time with my family. We will visit my wife’s older children that she never had a chance to raise as well as the few expat friends of mine that still reside in Thailand. We still have Thai friends in Bangkok that we will visit and discuss how our respective lives have changed.
Thais live in the moment. What happened yesterday is water under the bridge and karma will look after tomorrow. Today is where they live and given friends and good food, they are happy. I envy that mind frame but my belief is, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail.
So, being a farang, I plan for the future. Our son is entering grade 7 this coming fall and our plan was to go back to Thailand and enroll him in an international school for high school. The thought was that he would gain some great connections if he decided to live in Thailand. However, I really can’t see myself living full-time in Thailand for four years. Thailand has lost the appeal for me and the Thai government just makes it so difficult for a farang to live there. My son has dual-citizenship, and my wife is a permanent resident in Canada so life is easy. My wife does not need to work and enjoys Canada.
I see us visiting Thailand every 2 years for 2 months max. This will enable us to visit family and eat some great food with family and friends.
Unlike Stick, I am in my twilight years, but I completely understand why he wants to move on. I have enjoyed his weekly now for about 15 years and I thank him immensely for what he has shared in the weekly.
However, a word of advice, you need to plan for your retirement. Perhaps write a book on ‘Stickman’s Adventures in the Land of Smiles’ 😊
Take care, Stick.
