Billboard’s 9th Year Anniversary Party
I’m a bit surprised nobody—myself included—reported on Billboard’s 9th Anniversary party. I refrained, because I just assumed you would get a hundred reports. My mistake. I’ll now take the bait you put in your latest column and offer my take on the event.
I attended, and while the now overused phrase is “Been there; Got the t-shirt”, at Billboard it’s “Been there; Got the glass tumbler”. (The first 100 entrants were given the swag.)
In a word—maybe two words—it was great fun. One was well advised to arrive early, and not only to get the glass tumbler, but just to get a seat. The buzz began right at 20:00 hours and stayed at fever pitch throughout the night. The baht clouds also kept opening and raining lucre, as many customers chose their own way to dispose of their discretionary income. The women were given free rein to wear whatever they pleased, and what most wore was exactly that: pleasing. It never ceases to amaze the advantage women have in being able/expected to wear makeup. While I wouldn’t say makeup can make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear (I’d be a sow’s ear even if makeup was permissible for men), there were women who might not normally draw my attention, who looked absolutely stunning. Pardon my grammatical error, but the women who usually look stunning looked stunnier. For those keeping score at home, I was particularly impressed by the extravagance and creativity of #26 and #936, the whimsy of #55, and the reserved elegance of #38 and #602. Other women who looked particularly special to this grateful bearer of a Y-chromosome were #601, #302, #36, #944, #53 and #236. I’m sure others drew my gaze (or gawk), but their numbers escape me at this moment. Billboard currently sports a few women who would have pleased even the most discriminating punter 20 years ago, so put to rest the notion that ‘women were so much better back then’. “Back then” is NOW for some of Billboard’s best. The gods’ celestial factory is still churning out beautiful models, and they’re landing at Billboard. Plus, many young women are now eschewing tattoos and just showcasing that gorgeous Isaan brown colored skin. Not before time, in my opinion.
An aside: (One thing I see in today’s women, is that many have much more substance than in times’ past, and by substance, I do not mean silicon, filler and tatts, but substance as in personality that can pull in even a dyed-in-the-wool cynic not prone to instant infatuation and impulsive first day marriage proposals. I understand there are men who prefer ‘farm fresh’, as ‘she’ might not know ‘he’ is not exactly something special, but others of us get enjoyment chatting up women who have a wider range of experience and knowledge, not just someone who recently took the first long bus trip of her life from rural Isaan. I’ve chatted with women in Billboard who are currently attending university for subjects ranging from law to nursing, who earn enough to pay for school plus take care of the family. A woman cannot do that as easily, if she’s working a ‘normal’ job, so some women make the choice of spending some time in an agogo. Add to that the usual Thai penchant for ‘sanuk’, and it’s understandable why some men retain a particular fascination for the agogo or demimondaine world, even after a few years. If such experiences were good enough for men like author Graham Greene and theoretical physicist and Nobel Laureate Richard Feynman, who am I to say a man should grow out of that fascination? Some of the women develop ‘people skills’ that would serve them well in the public relations department of a corporate titan. I don’t think that was true 20 years ago of the women in the clubs.)
At around 23:00, the women who wanted to vie for Babe of the Year took turns on the carousel, letting customers show their approval with applause and the occasional hoot or holler. Many customers were also given a form to pencil in the numbers of their personal favorites, not all of whom even wanted to compete for the title. The top ten or so were called up by badge number for a final show of approval, with the winner ostensibly eliciting the highest decibel reading. Loud is loud at some point, so the human ear could not possibly differentiate Win, Place, and Show. The powers that be made that determination, no doubt by purely technical means (?), and unless I’m mistaken, #224 took the crown and the prize money. #54 took second. Third was lost in the crowd, at least to me. The crowd was too large and the noise too deafening for me to get all the details.
In my admittedly not professional opinion, Billboard fully deserves its reputation as Thailand’s best. It has been carefully crafted to be a destination, rather than an also-ran, and the fact it is packed most nights, even during low season, is proof the business model is working. Its pricing is the same as any of its neighboring venues, and much less than Pattaya’s top clubs, but it stands apart from its neighbors by drawing a crowd every night. Women at other clubs in the complex grab passersby, trying to pull them in and fill seats, while Billboard seems to have a natural magnet that does all the pulling. It even seems to have made East Asian nightlife and tourist forums, as it now draws many East Asian couples anxious to see what the best Bangkok nightlife is all about. I don’t think many visitors walk out disappointed.
In sum, Billboard is entertaining any night of the week, but its parties—including this year’s Anniversary—are in a class of their own.
