Readers' Submissions

The Value of Western Massages

  • Written by Anonymous
  • October 3rd, 2019
  • 3 min read


In today’s article, I would like to discuss the value massage places bring to western society and what they really say about the nature of men as well as the status of marriage in the United States.

Living in a major metropolitan city (think NYC, LA, Chicago and so forth) it seems to me from conversations with my friends’ girlfriends and wives that most women assume happy ending massage parlors and the like are only available in places such as Thailand. That is where the disgusting perverts hang out and never could such a thing really be feverishly prevalent in the United States. We are better than that. Well, although I do not frequent AMP’s as I am in a committed relationship with an amazing woman, it astounds me just how long these businesses have been and continue to be around. I am talking about the standard rub and tug place. You know, the ones so well concealed they even give facials, no pun intended and waxes, do nails – the whole 9 yards.

I never really thought about the value these establishments bring to communities until yesterday when I was enjoying a cold IPA outside in the hot weather at a café directly across the street from an AMP (admittedly I went there to people watch). As I sipped on my beverage, an older balding man exited the parlor, trying to walk away from the establishment as quickly as possible. It was there that I realized this establishment had pretty much been there since I was in high school ages ago, I just never noticed it, of course.

I got to thinking: how much money do these places make that they can afford to keep up with the city’s rental expenses? Surely it isn’t one or two “creeps” that show up. To keep such an establishment running, there needs to be consistent income. You see, the area I was in was quite a residential area surrounded by local coffee shops and houses. A perfect place to raise a family and eventually, retire. A perfect breeding ground for those growing un content with their marriage to pick up a new habit, all within walking distance. Let’s say on a conservative scale, these places bring in 3.5 customers a day with the total cost of the massage and tip being $110*3.5=$385 a day these places are bringing in. $385*355 (let’s be conservative and assume there are a whole 10 days off during the year the establishment is closed) that would yield $385*355= $136,675 gross income! For a place that employs 2 masseuses a day, that ain’t bad! Realistically however, I would say a place like this brings in on average more than that but I truly would not be able to say. Remember: these places also do facials, waxing and other beauty treatments whose income is not accounted for here.

But what value do these places bring and is their role in our communities justified? The way I see it, yes. For $110 you get a nice 1-hour massage and some rest and release in whatever areas as needed. You can expect to pay pretty much the same price if not more for a more traditional massage place that doesn’t come with the R&R. I think these establishments bring a great value to the communities in which they sit. A lot of women, particularly married older women, tend to not want to put out as much. This is common knowledge. We all know the stereotype, “gotta go home to the nagging wife…” or “me and my wife haven’t had sex in ages”. To me, it seems like these wives think they’ve won. They think they’ve suppressed their husband’s needs or simply gotten their way without realizing that in fact, this is not the case at all. If it were, these places wouldn’t be around. That to me, is not a fair trade deal and thus appropriate corporate actions must be taken to even things out.

Don’t get me wrong of course, there are plenty of ladies who I’m sure still provide for their husbands needs and what not, and for that group, I am also sure there is a smaller group of deviant men who still go to these establishments to get their fix.

In short, the more I see so many of these parlors around, the more evident it becomes that this has become a symptom of sexless marriage and will continue to be so.


The author of this article cannot be contacted.