Stickman Readers' Submissions October 9th, 2019

Dating in the Philippines Part 5

Online Dating Continued…..

Good day readers, continuing on with my thoughts on online dating from part 4. As I penned before, the majority of Filipinas on online dating sites targeting foreign men are solely after a better life, citizenship to a Western country for herself and her family members or financial support or ongoing cash payments.

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Before I go any further, some might say I am a tad harsh in my opinions. My thoughts are from years of observations and experience. Just clarifying, I am early 40s, decent looking and can travel or live anywhere I please, for the time being. In my opinion if a white foreigner (nothing racial intended) lives in the Philippines, or is involved in online dating and is emotionally weak, exercises bad judgement and thinks with his heart, he will get fleeced plenty and taken advantage of in general.

I like a lot of things about the Philippines and I dislike a lot of things too. I like a lot of Filipinos and I dislike a lot of Filipinos, but mark my words the average Filipino’s mindset is extremely different to a Western view on life.

Wealthy Filipinos are more like Westerners, especially the ones who have lived overseas and have a realistic view of their country as they have seen how life in the West is. I find them much more easy to relate to as we have similar lives education wise and economically.

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I would guess 90% of girls on Filipina online dating sites are from the poorest class of the Philippines. Believe me when I tell you that the class system is alive and well here, it’s there for all to see. The gap between rich and poor is massive, and I mean massive.

I think probably 50% of the population lives below what they classify as the poverty line, and take a trip there and you will see it all over the place. Personally I don’t think anyone should be hungry, but the rich are not be going to give up their position in life anytime soon.

I read a piece once from an expat saying that “Sociopathy and narcissistic personality disorder are rampant in the Philippines, and it’s manifested as Pinoy Pride”. I agree with it. Remembering that the average Filipino, especially the poorer ones, are taught to follow, never question anything and in a lot of cases the Catholic Church rules their lives and thoughts. Sin and be forgiven, with really no remorse and no lessons learnt, again not all of course. However so many Filipinos look different but in personality characteristics replicate each other in so many ways. A long-term expat friend of mine calls them Pod People.

The wages are low in the Philippines and inflation is super high. A girl with a high school education (probably year 8 maximum in the West) who works a sales job might earn between 200 and 600 peso a day, in most cases probably closer to the 350 mark. The prettier, taller ones get about 600 a day at SM department store the last time I checked.

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Yes there are often height requirements for sales jobs etc. dealing with the public in the upmarket malls. The province girls on the farms often have a lot less opportunity work wise and financially than the city girls if they stay on the farm. Yes, life can be tough in the Philippines.

Even a girl with a college degree can often be on a low wage in her profession. I have an idea as I have dated girls with degrees too. Often wealthier Filipinos have one or two children, more like people in the West. It’s the very poor families that are having the most babies, due to low education, bad decision making and again, the rule of the Catholic Church. (I have always believed the church in the Philippines is often responsible for keeping the poor poor).

It’s super common to see a family with 10 children, and often all struggling. If when grown up all 10 children work, then they prosper and often to make it to what they classify as middle class, if two out of 10 children work, and the rest including Mommy and Daddy rely on the two then basically it can become a living hell for the bread winners to support them.

Family is everything to Filipinos in a lot of cases, so the working children will never say no to the demands, even if they want to and know its unfair. It’s often a never-ending uphill battle for a lot of girls to support the demands of the often-irresponsible family. I have known so many girls to have done years as nannies and domestic helpers overseas, and worked their asses off, and sent basically most of their salaries back to the Philippines.

They come back to the Philippines after two years and find all the money has gone and quite often there is absolutely nothing to show for it. The smarter families at least invest it in a business, but often its goes to waste on nothing.

Girls from these backgrounds are the most common on the Filipina dating sites. It often goes something like this…A family friend met a western guy online, he sent money, or married her, took her to his country etc., so now they want a piece of it also.

Now remembering for these girls it’s virtually impossible to marry a rich Filipino man, it rarely happens due to the class system, and basically the guy doesn’t need to. Also remembering, skin colour is all-important to a lot of Filipinos (again the class system, which I think is bullshit). Darker skin equals farmer and often poorer, lighter skin equals more status and often more money. There are exceptions to the rule of course, but believe me, its real.

Take a trip to the supermarket and see all the shelves of skin whitening products there. The Philippines is Americanized to an extent. A lot of poorer Filipinos, especially women, idolize white skin, blue eyes and pointy noses. It’s an extremely vain and superficial society like that. The wealthier don’t mention it much, so I guess they don’t think about it too much, not sure?

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