Sweet Girl, Or Maybe Not That Sweet

I was visiting South-East Asia in December last year, 2016. I had already visited Vietnam and Cambodia, before I came to Thailand for the very first time, and those were amazing places to experience, in many ways. I was very happy that I chose to visit this side of the world, everything was an incredible experience, the places, the landscape, the food, the party, and last but not least, the women.

I am of Hispanic descent, not that white, but not that dark, regular height, and dark hair and dark beard. I found out that the people in those countries find that kind of look very interesting, because it seemed to me that they are more used to meet the kind of white male tourist, I mean blond guys, or at least white or pale, with blond or brown hair. It seemed to me that the people of those countries could not place me in a map, because any time they approached me, they looked at me and they asked where I came from. They could not guess right from which country I come from.

After Christmas day I left Cambodia. I had been visiting the temple ruins of Angkor in Siem Reap. I had the time of my life cos I am very interested in history, and I have wished all my life to see Angkor Wat. The place was magic, and I was really amazed. Night time was another story, incredible parties, not only with foreigners but with Cambodian girls too. I made friends to a girl or two in those days, and we partied like rock stars.

I took a minivan from Siem Reap to the border, Poi Pet. My plans were go to Bangkok, just straight from there, but somehow I didn’t find the transportation. It was a little bit late in the afternoon, so I decided to take the first minivan to any place. I was asked by a local: Are you going to Pattaya? I responded replied: I don’t know. But at that time I thought that it was a good idea. So I took my backpack with me, and I was on my way to Pattaya.

We arrived pretty late that night so I just went off to find me a room for the night. The very next morning I checked up the Internet to find a decent hotel. I booked a 4 star hotel close to Pattaya Sai 2. I thought maybe two days in the beach would do. The first thing I did was to relax, make order with my stuff, call home, and take a beer. But in the night, I didn’t realize that the hotel was close to the infamous Walking Street.

That night I walked around just to catch how the game was around in that place. I met a bunch of foreigners that recommended me if I wanted to meet local girls, I should sign in on ThaiFriendly, so I did it. The next day I signed in, and I made some contacts. I exchanged a few lines with a couple of girls, and one of them actually said yes to meet me. She said we could meet after that night, because she would go out with her friends after work. She asked me if I wanted to join them in a disco. We agreed to meet in I-bar around 11 o’clock. So I came to the disco. I looked for her, and there she was, a very pretty little girl, with her friends, only 5 girls and a boy. I came over and introduced myself, she did the same and introduced me to her friends. We had a beer, I asked her to dance, she didn’t say yes, but she came close to me and we kinda danced. We talked, and we agreed to meet the next day. She said she would come to visit me at my hotel. I thought it was just something she said to get rid of me. But in the morning, there she was, so I came down to the lobby, and I asked her to join me to my room. She came over, we talked and talked. She said she was pretty tired, and she wanted to watch TV. So we watched TV together, and I bought some snacks and drinks and we were together most of that day. That night we met again in the disco, same like the day before – she was with her friends, just girls and a boy. I think the guy was a boyfriend of some of the girls. We talked and drank, it was a little bit late, and I said I was thinking to go home, I told her I liked her very much and I would love to see her the next day. She said yes to that, and I asked her if she would like to come to my room that night for one drink. She said no, because she had to follow her sister, (as you probably know, Thai girls have an incredible amount of sisters). I insisted one more time and then she said: I’ll be with my sis a little while and then I call you. I thought nothing would happen that night so I did not insist one more time, I just agreed with her that she would call me after. Actually she did call, and she even came to my hotel. She said that she was a little bit drunk and she would not drive, and I offered her my room to crush for that night. She laid on the bed fully clothed, and takes a blanket and rolls herself into it and slept.

In the morning after she woke up, I approached her, and tried to tickle her, something she found amusing. We watched TV fully-clothed and talked. After a little while we held each other’s hands, and I found it proper to try to give her a hug. She did not refuse, I didn’t want to be pushy, so we were on and off for a while, more tickling and suddenly we began to fool around. We were playing a lot, and after a long pause, we began to fool around for real. I tried to take her clothes off, but she resisted. We kissed for a long time, and after many attempts, and after I turned off the lights, we were naked, and we did what we had to do. She did not seem to me like a girl with a lot of experience. She seemed to be shy, and a little bit frightened.

I was very happy to meet her, she was very sweet and full of joy. I didn’t know very much about her at that time. Only her name, W______, she was 23 years old, she was almost finished with her studies in the university and she worked in the reception of a hotel in Jomtien. I forgot completely that I had to go to Bangkok, but the last days before I left she said she was busy. She came to see me, but she was in a rush for something, she said she was very tired so we watched TV again, but suddenly somebody call her, and she was like desperate. She said it was her sis, and they would go out that night because they will met some friends. I got a little bit upset because she said it was her sis, but I listened and she spoke English on her phone. It was supposed to be our last night together, but she was in such a hurry, so she just said bye, we will meet tomorrow. She sent me many messages that night, but we didn’t meet. The next morning, I packed my stuff and I left Pattaya. I went to Bangkok anyway, cos my flight was the very next morning. I was a little bit sad because we didn’t say goodbye properly. But when I was in Bangkok, she messaged me. I told her my flight was the next morning, she didn’t believe me. I said maybe we can write to each other, and she just said err.

So I was back in Norway again, and in the second of January, I was already working again. I am a high school teacher, so my life is pretty quiet. I already missed the places I just visited, and especially her. And then, during that morning, I received a message. It was her. She wanted to know where I was – and if I still was in Thailand. I say to her I was by my desk, she asked me about a picture of my desk, so I took and send it to her, the she said: you are really gone. I was happy we contacted each other, but happiness was about to change to concern, that many of the things she told me in weeks to come weren’t consistent.

We began to write each other, by messenger, and after a while by LINE. We wrote each other very much, and we talked and video called too. I found out she partied very often, and I found out some of her friends work in a bar in Walking Street. That made me really worried, because sometimes we video called each other, and she was barkeeping there. I have asked her straight if she is a bar girl. But she always says no, she only helps her friends once in a while. Time went on, and I found out she kept in touch with another Norwegian boy, much younger than me. I am 37 years old. She said she only met him once and never did anything with him, but her graduation day came, and she went to her province, Surin, to prepare herself for the graduation ceremony. She took a lot of pictures that day and then I saw the presents she got that day, among them was a necklace, but it wasn’t the problem, I recognized the words written on the box, it was written in Norwegian. So I asked her, why she was still receiving gifts from him. W___ and me had already discuss the possibility of becoming girlfriend and boyfriend, and I told her I didn’t find that quite nice. She just said that he send her a gift, so I inquired her how it was possible for him to know about the ceremony, and her address back home if they don’t contact each other. She just replied that he got it before.

More time went by, and winter break was over and our kinda relationship was going somewhere. I found out that she lost her job when she went to the ceremony. She found another job in another hotel, in Soi Buakhao in Pattaya, but she never wanted to tell anything about the place, not like before, something I find quite weird. But anyway, we had a relationship now. She still parties a lot, but sometimes I ask her not to go, and she listens to me and remains home. I ask her not to visit her friends in the bar in Walking Street, something she did very little of after we talked. So I ask her if I can come to visit her during Easter. She said it would be nice, so I went to Pattaya to visit her. We spent a lot of time together that week. She behaved very nice, and even refrained from using her cell phone because I find that very annoying. Sometimes when we use to video call before, I could see it flashes into her face all the incoming messages. One thing I found out during that trip is that she had a foreign friend from Israel. I recognized the letters in the cell phone and I asked her. She said is only a friend, I will write more about Israel-guy later.

When I was visiting her, Songkran was on. She wanted to visit her friends in the bar in Walking Street. All the girls in the bar are from Surin and it seems to me that everybody knew each other there very well. What really surprises me was how natural she was there. She went behind the bar, in and out. Another thing that surprised me very much was the fact that I met a girl in person that I had seen on our video calls, apparently, the manager of the bar, that my girlfriend calls «Boss». The Boss was a very young girl and she was very polite to me, but I asked my girlfriend why she called her boss if she never worked there. She says that everybody calls her Boss. Well, I still wonder about that.

Many days passed by, and I had to come back home, so we kept in touch after that. After a couple of weeks, I saw my girlfriend made friends again with that Norwegian boy. She told me she had deleted him and he called her crying and asked her to still be friends. She said she told him she has boyfriend, but he said he wanted to be friends anyway. I said to her I really did not understand why so much deal with that kid. If it is as you told me that you never had nothing to do with him why so much trouble about it? I guess I got really mad this time, because she decided to tell me about him. She said they just met in a disco and they became friends on Facebook and after a while, much before I met her, they wrote to each other. I asked her if there was something more to know about another issues, then she reply: You remember that man from Israel? I said yes, then she told me that they met each other back in Chiang Mai, and he had a family, and he wanted to help her. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. She didn’t tell me how long time that had been going on or how much «help» we are talking about, or what kind of relationship she and him had at all. She said that they never had anything, but he just wanted to help her. She told me too that he visited Pattaya one time after they met in Chiang Mai, but they just met for dinner once because he has a family. She promises that nothing happened between them. I still wonder about it too.

But this issue could really explain things that I still don’t understand, but not in a certain way, because she denied all those things all the time. I think she cannot make so much money, and she told me she would have a nose job by plastic surgery. She had already done that, and recently she bought a new cell phone.

A couple of days ago, my girlfriend deleted the only picture of us from her Facebook wall, and she hid her friends list, so I cannot see them. So I am suspecting that something is not right. I am really concerned and worried about that, because I will travel soon to visit her again.

I have a lot of questions, but she won’t tell. She just doesn’t answer. It really cost me much to believe in her, but I do not have the proof or at least I cannot be completely sure if she is that kind of girl.

Some opinions?

Stick’s thoughts:

There are so many red flags here. Just because you didn’t meet her in a bar but on a website does not mean she is not a working girl.

This lady works in bars. Her friends are bargirls. She might be a freelancer or she might even work in bars. I don’t believe what she says about having a hotel reception job. Maybe she did once or maybe it is a complete lie. You know this lady has umm, errr, “dated” other foreign men. I’d say it likely she is juggling a few other guys, just like you. When you say that she spent a week with you at Easter and didn’t use her phone that was almost certainly because turning it off was the only way you would not realise other men were trying to contact her!

This lady is enjoying the life. She probably has a few different men she is juggling abroad who visit her from time, and then there are all of the guys she meets on a nightly basis. This lady is not looking for a relationship. If someone made her a huge offer she might go for it but it’s hard to imagine why a 23-year-old living the life would leave it. She has lots of money, lots of attention from men, lots of friends to have fun with every night and she has her freedom. Who would want to kiss that sort of lifestyle goodbye?!

My advice is simple. Think of her as a bit of holiday fun and nothing more!

The author can be contacted at : vjguillermo@hotmail.com