Response to Nightfighters
I have just finished reading your latest submission and I think you have summed it up 100 per cent. For myself, I had my first visit to Asia with the wife in the late ‘70s – Singapore, Hong Kong, Philippines and Thailand. Subsequent visits followed with my first stag visit in the early ‘80s and of course we indulged heartily.
Let me relate an incident that occurred on that trip. We were in Manila and during the Marcos era it was wide open. I took a young pretty home from a gogo bar and she was my companion for the remaining four days. When it was down to the last few hours we had a small disagreement. I wanted more of her charm and she wanted to go shopping. I reminded her of all the gifts I had already bought her and asked what she had given me. Her reply floored me and it was only one word, “Memories”. That word so quietly offered yet so profound probably, no certainly buried itself in my brain and formed part of my modus operandi for future dealings with girls of her type. I owe her big time.
It was on this boys’ only trip that I discovered Pattaya. Later as my children grew older and the marriage bonds grew weaker I was allowed solo visits up to months at a time in Pattaya. Two hundred baht BJs at the Billion Bar, Golf for five hundred, cheap beer and food and all-nighters for a purple persuader [500 baht] and they would wash your undies in the morning. I know it has been mentioned over and over but the girls really were different and perhaps back then not as mercenary and perhaps a relationship of longer duration may have been possible but as a married man with family it was not on my agenda.
When my marriage finished in ‘97 we split the marbles and I caught a plane for Thailand. Pattaya it was to be and today it is still my home. Luckily I had learned a bit during my earlier visits and dodged most of the newbie traps, but still felt young enough for some sort of relationship. The girl in question was not a bargirl but a freelance whore who after one month with me shifted in with my neighbour for an extra 2,000 baht a month. It was a blessing and taught me a valuable lesson that commitment here had a dollar value. That she still came to my room for short-times showed that trust was absent.
Having decided that a serious relationship with that style of woman was not going to get results, I adapted and still use the come and go style (I come and they go). However, I have had a number of favourites over the years and many have stayed with me for lengthy periods. This they have done on the understanding that they may still practice their profession and I will pay only when I take advantage of their services. Surprisingly this has seen some real friendships develop several lasting more than ten years. Not that I am awfully mean but I find barfines an unnecessary extra and have managed to do away with them entirely since becoming a permanent resident. I find that many bargirls are agreeable to some extra-curricular activity outside their workplace and as it is their own selection rather than someone who has bought them they often perform better [strange as it may seem].
I recently celebrated my eightieth birthday and three of these girls attended with their current partners, all of whom are known to me and know of my previous history with them. Another sent me a lovely Line message and sang Happy Birthday to me. She, by the way, had recently brought her German sponsor around to meet me. As an added effect, these girls have all become known to each other and have also become friends of sorts. When together as some times happen like a trip to a particular temple somewhere in the countryside, they swap stories and strategies. Laughs all around when they compare notes on different punters. There are some strange creatures out there in Mongerland!
I have never been over generous with any of them. No houses, no cars, just one second-hand motorcycle that was essential. But I have been there for them with many other problems – bail money on one occasion, some rental assistance and other minor things and believe it or not (no Ripley’s) most of it has been returned in cash or kind. I write this not to boast that I am smarter than the average monger but to show that if you cut through all the BS about love and commitment and play the game within the rules of that space and offer real friendship and understanding, it is possible to have a relationship that is close to genuine.
Again, thanks for your submission. It really summed up the Pay 4 Play situation and it is nice to know that there are others that have sussed it out and gained benefit from that understanding.
That, dear readers, was my note to Gary. As a footnote, I imagine some or perhaps many will be wondering if at eighty my career is over? The answer is not yet although I do not have as many appointments these days. Have to go now some one knocking on the door.