An Internet “Dating” Odyssey, Part 1 of 2

By Judge Dredd

Well, “This-is-Thailand” as we say, and so many things are either total fakes or minor illusions, so you just have to learn to play the game.   I’ve lived here for 16-years, and I still haven’t figured it all out, but I play the game anyway.

I’m age “nearly 70”, retired, and a divorce-exile. I am an unashamed whore-monger, and I’m very much into the “Pay-for-Play” scene.

I like a change of pace, and over the years, I have become unashamedly “hooked” on reading the adverts each day in CraigsList personals, and BackPage, and eBangkokAds.com, and etc.   After a few years of this, I have finally realized that my “daily addiction” consisted of drooling over the same ads over and over, and looking at the same 10-year old photo shopped pictures that these “Internet Working Girls” have used continuously and forever. Almost every “Internet Whore” that I have ever met in person is at least 10-years older, and 10-kilograms heavier than advertised, and very well worn, and usually devoid of any serious GFE/PSE sexual skills.

So, you can absolutely forget “truth-in-advertising” when you read CraigsList personals.

So, that finally led me to “Thai Friendly”, and after a brief trial, I bought a one-year membership, complete with full access, full detailed search features, and etc.

I finally settled on writing a profile listing my true age (nearly 70) and using morphing software, I slightly changed my facial features, not to look younger, but mostly so that I would not be easily recognized by any lurkers, old girl friends, private investigators, or bored FBI agents with nothing better to do.

I also made it clear in my profile that I had certain preferences, and that I only wanted to meet ladies who were “side liners”, meaning that they had a real job, and that being a hooker for 2,000-THB for short time was not really their chosen avocation, rather it was something that they did occasionally, as a “side-line”, like when their rent was past-due.

I was besieged. Short girls, tall girls, fat girls, skinny girls, lovely girls, ugly girls… 18 to 99, crazy, crippled, and blind, they all clicked the “I’m Interested” button.

And then, it happened. The honey trap. The damsel in distress. The young cutie. She started the online conversation with me, and her lead-in was not at all shy or ambiguous. Her first text was – –

“.. Hello. Even I’m only 18 but I want to try sex with you ? Can I have sex with you ?”

Well, let’s see, either she can read my profile or she can’t. And she’s only 18 and I’m 60-something, so unless she has some “Grand Daddy” fetish, this will be awkward.

But, like the moth drawn to the candle flame, I couldn’t help it, and I replied. The rest is history.

When I looked at her profile, I was smitten with her very cute and chubby little “baby face”, and I guess that was my undoing. Her profile also listed her height as 157cm, and her weight as 60 kilograms. Well, I would prefer 45 kilos, but what the Hell, ya know? I just had to try it.

We chatted both online on Thai Visa for a few days, and also via email and mobile phone SMS text. I was surprised at her very good written English skills. When I actually spoke on the phone with her, I was also surprised that her spoken English was actually quite good, as well.

At one point in the emailing, I challenged her to prove her age, and she actually (and almost immediately) photographed her Thai I.D. card and sent the unredacted image to me.

Well, the fateful day arrived, and we met at a well-used short-time room on Sukhumvit. I was stunned. Her cute young face was actually as pictured.. but.. but.. instead of 157cm height, and 60 kilos weight, she was more like 170cm height, and 100 kilos weight. Never-the-less, I just couldn’t bring myself to hurt her feelings, and we went up to the short time room.

Good Lord ! !   What an experience. I have never met a more sweet, or needy, or horny young girl in all of my life.   Added to that, it struck me that she had zero tattoos, no piercings, and she was exceptionally “clean” in every way. Truly, she was a fresh young turn-out, and very new to the game.

I pride myself in having a good repertoire of sensual and sexual techniques to please the ladies, and it was all good. I couldn’t count how many times she came. She is somewhere between multi-orgasmic and poly-orgasmic, plus she understood fetishes, as I learned later. In pillow talk, we joked about “inappropriate” student-teacher relationships, especially given the extreme age difference, and since I was teaching her a few things.

Well.. I’m just guessing that she understands dirty old men better than I understand young Thai women.   She got up off the bed, and headed for the toilet, but she took her backpack with her. After what sounded like a brief shower, she emerged not nude, nor in a towel, nor was she wearing the slacks and shirt that she wore when we met.   Instead, she had put on her white blouse and blue skirt high school uniform, with no undergarments.

I was sitting on the edge of the bed, and she just walked up to me, and hugged me, (almost smothering me in her rather generous breasts) and she simply said, “..teacher, I’ve been bad, you need to spank me..”.

As William Shakespeare said in “The Tempest” – – “What’s past is prologue” – – and truly, all that we’ve done, on several dates, only leads to the opportunity for further debauchery and mischief on the next date.

If I survive this “paid relationship”, stay tuned for further instalments.

God help me, and your prayers would be appreciated.

Judge Dredd

The author can be contacted at bkkwildman@yahoo.com.