Fallen For A Thai Freelancer
I have been travelling to Thailand for a very long time and enjoyed many encounters with bar girls in Bangkok and should therefore know most pitfalls and games. I am addicted but inevitably have eventually fallen for one. So my mind is not working too clearly at present.
I have been seeing the same girl on 5 trips to the city in the last 5 months and things have progressed from paid to sort of paid to not paid at all. I have given her extravagant gifts like an iPhone 6s and cash on one occasion, plus paid all the expenses for meals, drinks, for her, her friends and her family.
I am about to re-visit for her birthday and she seems pleased I am coming back. She wants to give up her work, mostly escorting and freelancing but wants 100,000 baht a month to do so as she partly supports her family who I have met and seems genuine enough.
She is a retired former Immigration officer, with 2 adopted kids who are quite young. Indeed this girl was also adopted with her sister and is paying back for the help she got (apparently).
I am struggling to work out whether I am being a mug to consider this amount of money as it seems a lot, but she discusses openly how others can live for much less but she doesn't seem to want to compromise.
It is the weirdest situation, when she gets cross with me, doesn't seem to take much she either goes silent, says something hurtful or walks off as her way of dealing with things. She isn't sweet but seems incredibly genuine. I think she works at the high-end and her English is good so she can manipulate men at her mercy. Should I investigate her?
I have stayed at her family home twice and she has introduced me to her friends both from her normal life and her that which is hidden, showing me all her traits, good and bad.
It seems like a car crash waiting to happen as I am infatuated with her. She is party mad, and 35 next month, so where is the upside? She was not always into the bad life, was married to a Dutch guy in Dubai for 9 years so international in outlook. I think her story, pictures, timelines seem pretty good but do you ever know?
She is funny, fun and very engaging company. Weirdly the sex is both occasional and not as good as when I paid, but I have concluded this is partly a test and also her saying I don't enjoy what I do. That she is open about.
We have discussed half the money for working less until I can move over with her, probably also a mad idea.
I am married to a Farang and looking to make sure I get it right before moving on as others are involved. I didn't look for this girl and she didn't encourage me and still doesn't much (unless subtly). I can find younger, thinner etc. But she is intoxicating and has so any words of wisdom. I can't believe I have fallen for a hooker as I have slept with so many it is embarrassing but I seem to be hell bent on making this work and (sort of rescuing this girl)
Should I shoot myself now or just take a reality pill? I am fortunate enough to be able to afford to give this money but it doesn't sit well to do this unless we live together. At the same time it doesn't seem right to leave her working as she says "the show must go on" and tells me not to worry about it. Is this part of a guilt thing to get me to give in?
I am completely confused, but would welcome some reality tips, I know it is against the odds but I think she is genuine and has developed a good ice wall to deal with her many married lying customers and who can blame her? I am conscious I have probably lost the plot.
Last time I saw her we had an argument as she decided to go home on my last night for no reason, right in the middle of a meal out. On the way out of the restaurant she asked for money for her time. I politely said no and gave her a lift to collect her car. Money never mentioned since bit was offered a lift to the airport the next day. No idea what that was all about. It was a complete mind f*ck and she said she felt so sad about falling out as I did.
Is there any hope or am I deluded? I think most of these things are tests to see if I am genuine about her but she might just be nuts. Think I might also be there too.
Thanks for reading, as am 48 I should know better, but even the experienced meet their match sometimes.
I can understand this lady saying she wants 100,000 baht a month to leave the industry. If she is working at the high-end she could well be earning twice that amount. However, it also shows that money is of great importance to her and I think any woman who makes such a lofty demand – 100,000 baht a month IS a lot of money then you have to consider whether she really wants to be with you or wants an easy life with good money.
There are a number of red flags here. Her claiming to be a retired Immigration officer doesn’t seem to add up – if she did that it was for a very short time.
Let's not forget that you’re married! How can any lady expect you to be able to provide a good life for them while you’re also married.