Readers' Submissions

Good Grief, HH Harry

  • Written by Anonymous
  • November 11th, 2015
  • 4 min read




Since Kiwi Stick has invited comments on the HHH mega series online dating drama, here are my thoughts, in loose order as they come to mind (and no, I have NOT read all of HHH's submissions, just skimmed them, as a sleeping pill substitute at bed time, so to speak.

– What I find most disturbing is that a reasonably educated person would keep a diary about such trivial matters, and then carry on with a readers' submission marathon of unheard proportions. What world do you live in, Harry? Is there nothing more gripping, more exciting in your life than jumping thru hoops for Thai babes? You could bore the fleas off a dog with these submissions. Get a life, Harry.

– What is so difficult to understand about appointments and time in Thailand? Yes, Thais (women and men) have a different concept of time and punctuality. As do southern Europeans, Latin Americans, Africans etc etc – every guide book will tell you so !!! This is nothing new, and nothing to get excited about. Ask your buddies about this, not your mamasan pimpettes and bar girls.. I mean, you are old enough and have lived in Thailand long enough to have figured this out a long long time ago.

– After a couple of dates with late shows even the slowest Farang, Gringo, Barang or Gula should have figured out that maybe, just maybe, it is also okay for him to show up 1/2 hour late. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. And if teelak ain't there, and hasn't called, simply leave after 10 minutes and enjoy the rest of the day.

No exceptions, no teenage angst about losing the love of the century. And no excuses, accusations and frantic phone calls or texts to her, after all you haven't even met her yet !! You have no relationship with her whatsoever.

So, why the anxiety? Why wet your pants over a simple no show? Man up, Harry, hop on a bus, Gus, no need to discuss much. Simon and Carbuncle, I believe.

– Let's face it, Harry, by your own descriptions of yourself you are not exactly the catch of the day, more yesteryear's leftovers reheated for the umpteenth time in a microwave oven. Nothing personal, we all are getting there sooner or later.

Don't expect your sleepover dates to enjoy cuddling up to you – yuk. And to pay some of your dates a 1,000 Baht for visiting you, cleaning your digs, digging your garden, massaging your bum leg and tired shlong (now that is really charming) ? Good grief, but that takes the "Cheap Charlie of the Year" award.

– Reading the requirements for your new Thai babe, may I suggest you break up your demands and hire the following staff part time:
1. cleaning lady, weekly
2. gardener/handy man weekly
3. masseuse whenever needed
4. girl friend to cuddle and snuggle with This would be a clear and easy arrangement and would save you a lot of hassles.

– What, she doesn't look anything like the pic she posted on TLL – wow, now that really is a surprise pip pip.

– Most of all remember: YOU are in the driver's seat!!! Don't let some juvenile Thai chick take control over your life and cause you acid indigestion.

– My personal opinion is: Forget about online dating. Online dating should be fun, not to be taken seriously. If you are seriously looking for a lady friend you will have to leave your Hua Hin Farang gated ghetto and the security of the world wide web.

Take your car (or hop on the bus, Gus) and travel around Thailand. Visit, guide book in hand, places in between the big cities like BKK and Chiang Mai, there are lots of neat places in between. Kanchanaburi, Ayutthaya, Kampaeng Phet, Lampang, Phrae, Phayao, Nan, Chiang Saen. Travel down the Mekong River by road from Chiang Saen all the way to Mukdahan. The list goes on and on and on. Open yourself up to chance encounters.

Check these places out on Wikitravel, Travelfish and Google some Farang forums (forii ?)

Do your own thing, at your own pace. I guarantee you, this will be more fun than waiting for, calling or texting some flakey Thai babe at a bus terminal or shopping mall. Visit new places, expand your horizon, meet new people, have new experiences. Maybe you'll even meet a suitable match, without consulting your dating shopping list first.

And, most of all – have some fun !!! Life and love are not a bucket list with items to be crossed off with grim determination. There are no bucket lists in real life, least of all for women.

– Finally, what's it with this irritating "Pip Pip" ? Are we regressing into childhood? Am I the only one who has noticed this?

Felicidades from the Great White North.