Thai Girlfriend, I Don’t Know What To Think
I have been living in Bangkok for over 13 years), but I am unable to understand my girlfriend, make that almost ex-girlfriend. I would appreciate your opinion because I believe no-one else understands what an expat can go through in this country. Sorry for my poor English, it is not my mother tongue.
I have been avoiding the bars for years due to the experiences I had which were the same as other expats. It's a waste of money and time listening to lies from girls….you know what I mean. But 3 months ago "unfortunately" my partner, that came to see me from Europe, asked me to take him out.
We went to Soi Cowboy, Nana and finally to the Biergarten in soi 7 for one last drink. I had no intention to pick up anyone or to know any girl, just to take him around a bit more and then call it a night.
In the Biergarten I was hooked by one of the most beautiful and sexiest girls I have ever met. We both liked each other immediately and she looked tired of hooking in the bar. She is / was a really heavy professional, one who managed up to 3 short-times a night and has no doubt had hundreds of customers in her professional history.
That night I paid her to go home and sleep. She was confused and surprised.
The strange think is that she is 42 years old. She started hooking at 39, after 6 years with a 65-year-old guy from England, who she did not love and she left after he went with another girl. You know, the usual story… The bonus was that she got a house in Isaan worth 2 million baht, a Toyota Fortuner and some money in the bank.
I started to take care of her in the best possible way and suggested what she could do if she wants to change her life, and not hook forever. I really tried my best despite the fact that she has a super hot temper.
Despite the fact that I have to admit I was surprised to be invited to her room, to see her sisters at her birthday, to meet her daughter (no-one had that privilege before), I had the feeling that she liked the freedom of being a hooker, making money, controlling customers and being a kind of queen in her world.
During the 3 months of our relationship, I had to go through a series of very difficult and strange situations. I never saw her naked, not even in underwear, and we only had sex one time with very little in the way of other sexual activities. The reason? She is too shy, and she was afraid to lose me if we had sex.
Very difficult for her to stay in my home to sleep as she prefers to stay alone or with friends, except a few times when she really seemed happy staying with me.
We had a holiday in Chiang Mai where she lived before with her boyfriend, and that was the only really good time we had, the only time we made love (one night out of four). I never pushed her before thinking she was tired of sex.
Sometimes I believe her when she said she cares about me and she was really happy to stay with me. I could see she was not lying, but we always had a problem because she believes sooner or later I would have sex with another girl. Funny, she did not want to have sex with me, but she was angry many times just thinking I could sleep with someone else.
I never asked about her work, no reasons to ask while I know the system, but she was the one talking. She said she never liked to stay with someone for the night unless she knows him well, but later I discovered she went to Hong Kong, Singapore, Bali, England, Pucket, Hua Hin, Ko Samui for a holiday with some people. She tells me she is shy, but she described for me all the different male body types she has seen, and how men sleep naked all the time… In addition she told me about 3 relationships she has had with young sexy guys from Australia, England and France.
Once I picked up her phone just to look at the time while we were still in bed as I did not have my watch. She was terrorized and she quickly took the phone from my hands. She did not realize that just looking in LINE I could see all the man sending comments (many people and always the same).
I feel stupid because I knew that a relationship with a super sexy hooker with many man ready to support her does not have a good ending.
I have spent nearly 180,000 baht in 2.5 months which seems quite small to her, while she reminded me she is trying to "cut" expenses because she feels sorry for me.
Now she is in Isaan helping the family for the rice season and after a problem we had on the phone we have not talked for a week.
I don't know what to think and I am surprised how hard she can be.
A couple of my friends are really pushing me to leave her after I told them I had to use some savings to take care of her expenses.
I believe it is the best to stop this relationship now as it can only get worst. It is only 3 months now but it is hard, very hard. Maybe she has already decided what to do and she wants to go back to the bar, but I don't know yet. She doesn’t talk with me now.
Am I just another stupid "farang" with so many years in this country unable to understand that very few hookers can really stop their work and change their lifestyle? Am I really stupid?
This line of yours says it all: "I feel stupid because I knew that a relationship with a super sexy hooker with many men ready to support her does not have a good ending."
Unfortunately, there are a number of reasons why this relationship could be very difficult. This lady may have become accustomed to living a lifestyle that many men may not be willing (or able) to finance. It sounds like this lady has a plan B (and C and D….) and is still in contact with other men. This lady does not seem to be committed to you. I hate to say it, but I think her heart isn't in it…