This will be my first ever post to Stickman, and probably the most serious I will ever get. I actually prefer comedy above all else and I freaking love the posts by Steve Rosse. In particular, his comedy tale about the overweight, old white guy treating two farm girls from the gogo bar to a fancy continental breakfast and the perspectives of everyone else in that situation, not just the white guy. I was in tears. Yes, I know he borrowed the base of the story from someone else, but it was reality shattering for any smarter guy who can see through the eyes of other people.
And I have many of these tales to tell in my life.
I am in my 30’s and happily divorced from a Russian girl. She deserves her own chapter. For note, I will never marry again. Please tell me what it is in it for the man.
Yet, I still have a hankering for Russian women, many who travel to Pattaya. I spent five years learning the Russian language and it has given me a major advantage on my trips to Pattaya with my two best friends.
Why pay for a Thai girl when you can open conversation with a stunning, young Russian girl and win her heart with western male chivalry? It’s a romantic holiday like no other.
Yet, Thailand has been my savior. Any man, even the ones who say they are sick and tired of the it and the gogo bars, have had their hearts healed by that wonderful place. It seems to be the only place you can go for a two hour, GENUINE massage and then walk across to the other side of the side street for an amazing BJ, all for under 1000 Baht, or $35.
It is the place where three best friends can have the time of their lives, sit around drinking with each other, laughing and can GUARANTEE that by the end of the night, by the time they part ways, with hugs and high fives, they will take home a beautiful girl, have phenomenal sex and then meet the next morning for omelet’s Penang chick curry, and fruity, gay, coconut shakes.
It is paradise in its doses. It is the relief each man needs from western life and western emasculation.
Formerly, in my 20’s, a pick up artist coach, teaching low confidence men how to approach women on the streets, bars and clubs to gain a phone number and a first date, I hit my 30’s absolutely drained and no better for the experience. If anybody can tell you the disparity between men and women in a feminist culture it is a pick up artist. I even wrote books you can buy on iTunes and at Amazon. I do wonder if my books ever helped people to find true love or happiness. I’ll save that for another post.
Yet, when I discovered the sweetness of Pattaya, I understood there was a heaven for men. To live there, I knew would be the death of my faith in love and innocence. But to vacation there several times a year for complete stress relief, this is the very perfect place for a man.
So why does a man feel this need to go to Thailand? Why does he need the time in Pattaya? Has it always been this way, or is it becoming more and more symptomatic of the pain men feel throughout life, divorce, alimony, child custody disputes and corporate and financial slavery?
Well, I am here to say that there is something very wrong with male and female relations. As a former ‘Pick Up Artist’, I cannot actually be bothered trying anymore. The effort, pitted against the hopeful pay off of long-term relationship happiness is not worth it. The struggle, the fear of rejection the egoistic minds of western men and women, alongside their lack of health, their overweight, fatty bodies, duck-faced selfies, general apathy and lack of deep connection, has simply made me indifferent.
Meanwhile, I am earning great money, hitting the gym 5-6 days per week, controlling my own bachelor diet and I am taking some of the greatest Scuba diving adventures most people will never experience, recently returning from diving deep into the engine rooms of Japanese shipwrecks at Truk lagoon, Micronesia. Of course, slipping in two weeks of stress relief in Thailand.
Women and so-called relationships are on the lowest of my priority list. Only months into ANY relationship western or foreign, the nagging begins. The small, snide remarks creep in. There is less money in my bank account. Within three years, most men I have known, just want out. It is just destructive.
And so many readers and writers of Stickman’s website, it seems are under the false illusion that Asian women are so much better than western women. And then they complain about the Russians invading Pattaya and complain that the Japanese men are stealing all the best Thai girls.
It’s all too much to bother to care. Western men really care TOO much! But why?
How much extra time do you believe your Thai woman will give you when the money runs out, against a western woman? How much time are you spending actually making yourself attractive to the opposite sex? How are you putting more effort into your own self-improvement, to ensure that you have every right to claim the loyalty and love of only the highest quality women?
I often feel so drained and depressed when trawling YouTube and watching the online MGTOW videos. It’s like the opposite of the feminist movement but just as angry and hate-filled. I am a complete MGTOW. I can value only short-term relationships, when they fall into my lap. I wish it wasn’t this way. I am indifferent and I would love to feel that passion. It’s simply not there inside me, uninspired. There are better ways to spend my time and money.
I believe that western men feel too entitled, angry and slighted by the feminist culture and the byproduct of the current generation of the female race. And they have every right to feel this way. Men are treated like crap, in the majority by western culture. It is overt once you move past the dreaded friend zone. We are the perpetrators of everything evil, forgetting that we have created almost everything you see today, from your mobile phone, to the bed you sleep in every single night.
The planes you fly on, taking you to your dream destinations, all designed and engineered by men, built by men and serviced, mostly by men. The car you drive to the pump that allows you to fuel that car, all designed, engineered and built by men.
And for that effort and ingenuity, as a whole we are stepped on and berated by society and our partners in long-term relationships.
But I want to make a very clear distinction here. It was not YOU or I personally who designed and built those things. Tell me, when was the last time you personally even gave your time to a charity?
You play the victim as the man but what are YOU personally doing to change your situation and change it for the men around you? So escaping to Thailand to live will not save you.
Yet this massive base of men now choosing to go their own way is in the moaning and complaining stage. These videos on YouTube try to debate with women and feminists. They want to yell at them for the crimes perpetrated against the male population on a daily basis. They want to be heard!
But that isn’t going your own way. That is just fighting a losing battle. And going your own way is about not fighting at all. It is about saying, ‘Ok. You win the argument! … Well… see you later.” And then having the other party say, “Whoa… wait a minute. There is still more I want to yell about to make you more wrong.” And then you say, “No it’s ok. I am all wrong. You are right. Well… anyway… I am booking a flight for Thailand. I have just started a cool online business that is making me some money. I am using that money to book a holiday with my bros. Enjoy being right! And good luck paying for your own life.”
She has nobody to yell at. None of them can get at you. You have moved on to actually doing something worthwhile with your life, pursuing all of those passions you have wanted to pursue. Maybe to master the ultimate video game. Maybe to start that business, get that six-pack, get your pilots licence, whatever it is. All of that money you save from dating and maintaining the short-term happiness of your partner are now back in your pocket, to be redistributed into activities that make you happy. And that includes bro trips to Thailand. You know your place there. You will always be a customer. And the difference is that they are A Class at customer service.
Yet the MGTOW community is still at the angry stage. Why? When Thailand is a flight away! I was past my anger long ago. And while I love listening to some MGTOW material, to remind myself that I am making the right decisions with my life, mostly I just shut down my iPad feeling depressed and helpless. Nothing can come of complaining without taking action to improve your life.
Long ago after a tragic break up and betrayal, I costed the entire relationship and simply asked, “What did I do that for?” Being practical, I just worked out the costs of living against what I was receiving in return. I even worked out the average cost of sex with her, against what I would pay elsewhere. I also accounted for the amount of variety in those costs, because unlike many of the MGTOW community, I still have an avid sex drive that I don’t want to ignore just to make a point. The only difference is, I won’t jump through hoops of fire to get it.
I have female friends and when they want to begin talking about female rights or the battle of the sexes with me, I say, “It’s ok. There is no battle. Men are walking away from the battle. We have put down our guns and are just walking away. You can have all the rights and power in the divorce… because none of us want to get married to you in the first place, so your rights and power will never be an issue for us. “
We can pay for sex when we need sex and then we can go about our day building our business, playing computer games, going to the gym, going on bro trips, scuba diving, flying and having fun without ever having to pay long term costs to you and look after you in your old age. You win. There is no battle.
The shock that usually comes from this makes them want to debate further. But they cannot bait me. They cannot shame me and say that I just haven’t found the right woman yet.
Then they will inherently ask, “What about children?” To which I reply, “That’s your thing. Your reproductive clock is ticking. Mine isn’t. I can impregnate a woman when I am 80 if I want. You are the ones who want babies. We are just forced to pay for them. Sure we love them unconditionally when they are here but as far as actually beginning the baby project, you are the ones that really need to convince us to do that with you. And you had better make a convincing case because enjoying a cheap massage on the beach in Thailand seems like a much better way to spend THAT money.”
There is no debate. There is no argument. There is no yelling for your rights. Walk away and let them have it. They can have it all. Let them enjoy funding their own lives and raising their own kids. You have your own goals to achieve. You have charity to give your time to. And there are many in Asia.
You need to live your life in a way that is worthy of a biography and you will never do this by marrying or committing to a long-term relationship in the modern world. Your potential is simply lost.
In your old age, you will afford your own nurse. You will retire in a low cost country anyway. And realistically, most children think their parents are assholes anyway until they are old enough to appreciate them. So don’t worry what your child’s mother is feeding into your child’s mind. While she is raising your child, she is out of your hair, allowing you to move abroad.
Perhaps you are stung by alimony and it feels too late for you. Still, live a worthy existence.
And for the majority of men on the singles market, stay that way. The power is in your hands. Your body, your choice, as the feminists love to say.
And this is why I love Thailand. Not so much for the women, but for time with my best, male friends, the down time, being treated with the illusion of love, feeling alive and happy.
Sure that 60-year-old guy could probably have that same pretty gogo girl and maybe I would get a discount because I have a six-pack and good fashion sense. The pure excitement of planning and executing those trips with my brothers is worth working hard in a career I love and the hours at the gym.
So if you ever feel you are losing your way, and that you are tiring of that Thai life, remember that all life is impermanent. The more of something you have and the easier it is to obtain, the less you will appreciate it. Perhaps LIVING in Thailand is not the best way to be the best you. But no man can or should live in western culture in the current state that it is, where the odds are stacked against him without being able to escape to the Thailand paradise several weeks a year.
Appreciate this slice of heaven. But never let it be an excuse to slack off on being the best person you could ever be, reaching your full potential to give back to the world.
Greg Dean
