Readers' Submissions

All Men Who Go To Thailand For The Women Are Losers

  • Written by Starky
  • July 11th, 2014
  • 8 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok


YES, all men who go to Thailand for the women are losers! There you go! A ridiculous answer to an even more ridiculous question. Clearly a troll post (must have been a quiet week at Stickman H.Q.) but as it's pissing down outside I thought I just might pen a response. I have a funny feeling I won't be the only one. Now I must apologise in advance but I must blow my own trumpet a little bit in framing an appropriate response. As much as it grates on me, I hate talking it up. However, when you are dealing with the pure unadulterated Hubris to the magnitude of posters such as the Vietnam Prince, John, or our latest poser, sorry poster LoveThai (rather ironic nom de plume considering he has only been here twice and his choice of sub topic) and others that like to have a sly dig at those that come to Thailand, your only real choice is to fight fire with fire.

Now it may come as a surprise to our young friend that not everyone that comes here is a 70-year old divorcee or someone that does not have the ability to grab girls in their respective home countries. I would actually say the opposite. Now I first arrived on these fair shores nearly 20 years ago as a 23-year old blonde-haired, blue-eyed Aussie larrikin (bare with me, folks, it's trumpet blowing time). I too was fit as buggery, lived in the gym, played footy most of my life and had no problem whatsoever with getting girls at home. (Now if I was to have the ego of some posters, I would regale you with stories of how fit, how good looking, how stylish and exactly how many women I was constantly beating off with a stick but it makes for ordinary copy and really who gives a shit). Like all young men I was high on life and myself. 10 foot tall and bullet proof, I didn't think I was the duck's nuts, I knew I was. Same with many of my friends who also, it could be said, were not old or ugly, socially inept, unfit or any of the multitude of things that it seems that you need to be afflicted with to come to Thailand to sleep with the girls. In fact we came to come to Thailand, for Thailand, funnily enough. The girls were just the icing on the cake. When we went home we continued to go out and get girls there as well. I won't bore you with the stories of how Thailand was a much better place to party back then, nor will I say that everything is shit now and was so much better then. Those that have been around for awhile are more than capable of coming to their own conclusions about that. It's funny though that there seems to be such a negative stigma attached only to Thailand in this respect, for it must be said that there are many countries in the world where similar services are available and frequently cheaper as well. Philippines, Cambodia, Amsterdam, South Africa and South America to name but a few, though it seems you can travel to those places free in the knowledge that nobody will call you a loser for going there.

Let us return though to the original premise and perhaps a better question would have been "Are all men that sleep with prostitutes losers?" Similar question, answer is the same. Everyone from paupers to business execs, criminals to movie stars, and all those in between have prevailed themselves of the services of courtesans and for a multitude of reasons.

Now I wouldn't dare try and put a figure on it but I think it would be fair to say that at least half were not ALL losers and the same could be said of those that sleep with hookers in Thailand. LoveThai may not get it yet but men love sex! What better way to achieve that than through the cheap, available, no-strings attached services that only a hooker (or 2 or 3 together) can provide. Some do it because they love sleeping with a different woman everyday. Some are doing it on the sly. Some are doing it through addiction and it could be said that our less than handsome, socially challenged brethren are doing it as well. Does it then make them losers? Ah… NO, the moral compass may be a little skewed but that would be the harshest judgement I could make. I slept with hookers in my teens, through my twenties and thirties with no effect on my ability to still grab girls not in the industry or my attitude towards them. I am in my forties now and married but I will bet you London to a brick, that if it ever goes pear shaped, I will be again smashing the back out of hookers at every opportunity. Our young friend is still in his twenties. Wait till ya hit 30, champ. Back in Australia, once I hit my thirties your night-clubbing days are pretty much over, I found. There is something a little unsavoury and a little creepy about a mid thirties guy hanging out in clubs with those in their teens and twenties. You just look wrong. So that left me with pubs, barbecues, gatherings with friends, and the occasional party. The problem being there that the available pool of women is not that deep and all the time, charm and money you spend still might not get you over the line despite your gym-fit body, stunning good looks, huge wallet and shining charisma.

I will admit though having an over abundance of beautiful, willing, available, cheap women pawing over you and showering you with affection (real or not) eventually does change you somewhat. It also changes your attitude on the time, money and tolerance you will expend into getting a "normal" girl, particularly if you aren't really looking for a relationship. Again, does that make you a loser? Well to most people I know that makes you a winner! It all depends on your priorities but I would posit that if you were the shack up with one girl get married type of fellow, that you wouldn't be frequenting prostitutes as a regular occurrence. A decent night out in Oz will cost you at least a couple of hundred bucks with no guarantee that you will hook up with someone and get the result you are looking for and forget about a 100% strike rate. If you're a normal working bloke, how many nights a week can you go out anyway? So for some, it makes more sense to miss out on those expensive, drunken, mostly fruitless nights out, save up a bit of coin, jump on a plane to the tropics and enjoy as much carnal pleasure as they can in their few weeks here. Good luck, I say. I call it good economics and setting achievable goals. Again, are you a loser? Again, I say the opposite.

His other premise is equally absurd and there is nothing worse than someone that slags off the women from their home country. <I strongly agree and generally it says more about the person mouthing off than anything elseStick> I love all women, no matter where they are from and Asian women can be just as hard to deal with as any other women in the world. Some would say they are tougher and harder to handle, but that's academic. He seems to think that your only choice is that you are a loser that sleeps with hookers because that you can't handle women in the west. Those two statements aren't mutually exclusive and you could be both but you also could not be either.

My biggest pet-peeve is those that make broad, generalised statements trying to put "all" of something in to one little box. Of course it is human nature to want to classify things, make assumptions, stereotype or typecast people so that you have a nice easy to handle definition or label to hang on someone. Nice concept but the human condition is one that has infinite reasons, infinite explanations and infinite motives for doing whatever it is we choose to do. I don't wish to be too hard on the lad – you can't put an old head on young shoulders. Eventually he will figure it out. He was also very careful to distance himself from either premise but therein lies the conundrum. You must have some stake or belief in the things you write or you wouldn't take the time to write them and we all know he wasn't asking a question. He was making a statement. You sit on the fence too long though and they will end up calling you "splinters", mate. Towards the end LoveThai started making a few huge jumps in logic that really didn't make much sense and again seemed to be far more of an opinion than a question. I always laugh when people talk about Thais as "regular" or "good" or "bad". The assumption that all girls that work in bars are bad and that those not in the industry are good. There is good and bad in everyone or as Jay Z so nicely put it, "If you're having girl problems I feel bad for you son. I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one."

The rain's letting up and I am getting thirsty so it's time to wrap this one up. Despite the fact, in my opinion, the whole sub was a troll. Neither premise really holds much water. For the most part those that come to Thailand for the women aren't losers, and most women in the west don't lack quality or understanding. WOW, I could have started with that and not worried about all the long winded BS it took me to get here, but what the hell, like I said it was pissing down.

Have fun out there,

Starky