Thai Girl Pregnancy Scam
Pregnancy scam or just the truth – give me my happiness back!
Since two months I am living a life shaped by uncertainty, inward pain and trying to get my happiness back. Nobody wants a life with insomnia and wearing an inner burden which takes away the lust of doing things you enjoyed before.
Same for me, however sometimes things are happening which change your life, teaching you to appreciate life more
and clarifying you the importance of waking up every morning with a clear conscience, still being able to watch yourself in the mirror.
By getting confronted with extreme situations you often get the great chance to realize which things truly make you a happy person and which are just a misbelief.
Nevertheless your brain has to suffer a lot before it comes to this mental enrichment.
Why am I telling you that?
Putting my experiences in writing gives me the possibility to better handle the things which happened in the past.
I am a 20-year old student from Germany and back in my country for 10 weeks. After my one year stay in Australia I went to Thailand, hoping to enjoy some crazy parties, get a deeper insight in to Asian culture and just enjoy my 2 month trip. Like everybody my age I am used to the nightlife, I love to go to bars and clubs, flirt with girls, get drunk.
Nothing wrong with that, is there?
Also the night in Chiang Mai seemed to be a common one.
However it came different.
Me and my friends went to the Zoe's Party district which is very popular in Chiang Mai. After a while I met girl, started dancing with her and finally took her home. She didn't want any money, didn't look like a barfine girl and seemed to be just like a girl who wants to have fun. I made the mistake of having unprotected sex with her due to my alcohol level. During sex I asked her if she is taking the pill. She said no. Consequently I told her that we have to buy the morning after pill the next day. She told me that she already had one baby in the US and had had one abortion where the doctor told her that it is very unlikely for her to get pregnant again. Despite that I didn't want to risk it and told her that we would buy that pill to make sure she can't get pregnant. She agreed. So I slept with her again in the morning.
The next day we drove to the pharmacy. I saw her buying the pill, told her she shouldn't forget to take it and went back to my place, and she to hers.
The next day I went again to that party district with my friends and met the same girl. She started dancing with me. However, there was another girl touching me, not a sexual touching, it was more a short contact. She seemed like to take me away from her. After the fifth time I told her to fxxx off and showed her my middle finger. I found this touching very annoying, however it plays an important role in this story.
Just a few seconds later they kicked me out because she told the bouncer. I agreed and was aware that I have to accept it because I did a respectless act. The bouncer grabbed my arm, pulled me out and I didn't resist. Unfortunately more and more people and bouncers came, punching me and slapping me. Also the unknown girl came to me, shouted and then started to fight with "my girl". They were pulling each other's hair, slapping and pushing each other.
One bouncer punched me again, I got knocked down, lost my shoes and realized I have to leave immediately. My friend and me ran away to the next block, however two bouncers followed us for around 5 minutes. Finally they stopped and we took a rest at the next block.
"My girl" was suddenly there, crying and said she never had that happen in her life before. Concerning my question about what the other girl wanted, she said she wanted me. That was strange because the man next to her seemed to be her boyfriend but I accepted it. Then she asked me to go into another club. I declined because I was still shocked.
She told me that today is her birthday, so I felt sorry for her to have ruined her day and decided to go with her to make the rest of the night better. My friend told me I shouldn't go and that the tuktuk driver who had already stopped had warned him that "my girl" goes with a lot of boys. I didn't care what he said and we separated. I went with the girl to a few clubs and then to her home. We slept together again and unfortunately also didn't use protection again.
During the night I asked for her Facebook ID. She said that she doesn't use it a lot, however I convinced her. I was logged in in to her account and added my own account.
2 days later I realised that her friend request which was made by me from her account didn't appear on my account, so she should have cancelled the request. I was wondering, however I didn't care anymore. She had also given me her Skype name, which of course can't give me an insight of her life. I don't know why I kept in touch with her but 3 days later after our first sex, I asked her if she took the morning after pill after our first night. Actually this question was not necessary because all seemed to be normal, but my conscience feels better then, so I asked.
And she shocked me extremely by saying that she forgot to take the pill. I was totally angry and scared. Furthermore it was also hard to communicate with her not because of her English but the Skype connection was horrible and she refutes to WRITE on Skype even when I told her that she should write. After a long and complicated conversation shaped by the feeling of incredible strong discomfort I told her that most morning after pills can be taken in the next 72 hours and that she can still take it. However she tried to convince me that the woman from the pharmacy told her that the pill has to be taken on the same day. I didn't believe her the first time and went late in the evening and totally desperate to the guesthouse where she lived.
I tried to be calm but it was not easy and I was still super angry that she was so silly and forgot to take the pill. After an almost 1 hour conversation I convinced her to take the pill. I even checked her mouth to make sure that she had swallowed that pill, to satisfy my conscience.
During our conversation she went to the toilet and due to my curiosity and doubts concerning her stupidity forgetting to take the pill I took the chance to ransack the things on her desk. To my surprise, I found under a book lots of these morning after pills. I was totally scared and was not sure what is going on here. I confronted her with that, she just said, that these pills are from a friend. Since this moment I was thinking all time about this amount of pills and just came to 4 solutions:
1: She definitely wants a baby, and don't care from who it is.
2: Or she knows she can't get pregnant and other boys like me had also unprotected sex and did the same like me, so she doesn't use them.
3: Or she doesn't care and does not think she gets pregnant and for not feeling uncomfortable she doesn't use them.
4: Or she get these pills from the boys and sells them.
After a few days I was texting her again, asking her how she feels. Se said she feels sleepy and is not hungry clarifying the symptoms of a pregnant woman. I couldn't believe that, was almost crying, got a red head and immediately called my mum. She said it's actually not possible to realize these pregnancy symptoms after just 4 days, that made sense for me, so her drowsiness should have come from something else or she just wanna make me scared, giving me the feeling that she is pregnant.
I stopped writing with her and left Chiang Mai, heading south. She didn't text me for a long time but I got her still on Skype.
During breakfast on Koh Tao 2 – 3 weeks later I actually had almost forgot what happened, and was sure when she gets pregnant she is gonna write me on Skype. However I am a very emotional person, I need a clear conscience for being happy, I always need to know the truth 100%. Although it is very unlikely that I got her pregnant cause we just slept together over two days but a few times a day, I wanted to gratify my conscience 100% for forgetting all that.
So consequently I asked her carefully on Skype how she feels, she answered with a puking smiley. I continued asking if she is pregnant, she said yes. I couldn't believe that and suffered under the imagination to be a father from a little child who lives in Thailand with a liar and brazen woman.
I am just 20 years old. I have got so many plans but the thought of having a son or daughter somewhere in Asia makes even the mental strongest boy my age sick. Everything would change for me. I couldn't concentrate on other things, was frustrated and sad. I was more and more believing her, however I was wondering why she didn't tell me directly, why I had to ask her first. I was scared putting words in her mouth.
My mom told me to come home. She was worried about me becoming a victim of something criminal, that common Thai pregnancy scam. She also didn't believe the girl.
I decided to go back to Bangkok for being more central in case I wanna fly home. For me it was sure, I can't keep putting my focus on the normal student life when I would become a father. Of course she could raise the baby alone but as I already told you, I am a very emotional person.
I was pretty sure that I wanted her to have an abortion. I contact her on Skype again but she never writes back, instead she always calls me. I told her that the connection is bad but she kept calling me and she was definitely no unalphabet! < Is that some Germanism?! – Stick> Maybe she didn't wanna have anything in writing which proves that she wrote to me. She refutes the idea to abort the baby, she wants to keep it or to give it to someone else. I was wondering why she is so sure that it is from me. She told me that she didn't had sex for a long time and so it must be mine. However, remember the tuktuk driver told my friend something different. Slowly I was thinking again about the other girl who touched me at the bar district in Chiang Mai and got me in to trouble.
More and more questions appeared in my head. Why did the other girl start fighting with "my girl", although she had nothing to do with my respectless act of showing my middle finger? The girl who touched me seemed to have a boyfriend, so probably she was not jealous that I was dancing with "my girl", but why did she touch me then and why she started fighting my girl?
Slowly all these small things like the tuktuk driver and the touching girl seemed to play an important role. Maybe the girl wanted to warn me from this girl because she knows that she does that with many boys, playing with their conscience. Maybe "my" girl is known for her criminal machinations because even the tuktuk driver knew her!
I didn't have so much money to fly back to Chiang Mai and also didn't really believe her but I still had all this stuff in my mind. Imagine you are alone in Bangkok, 20 years old and you had these problems. I woke up every morning, didn't sleep well, my heart was running all the time, I couldn't relax and didn't want to believe her.
After a few more Skype calls I could convince her to do an abortion, I told her that I can't have a happy life when she keeps the baby and that we didn't agree to get a baby. She said she wants me to be happy and will go the next day to the doctor. I told her she should ask how much it costs and if I can get a pregnancy certificate from the doctor. <No such thing exists as abortion is basically illegal in Thailand – Stick>
The next day she told me that an abortion would be around 8000 baht and that she will pay my money back when she is able, however I didn't get that certificate. I am not sure if she said something like that somebody stole her money in the room but
as I said I cant really remember.
I asked for her bank account details but she just sent me the account number and not the real bank name, so it looked like that she doesn't regularly receive money from guys. I also got the impression that the pregnancy issue was not of any real significance to her cause she was not often online and never texted me, just received her Skype calls. I was happy that she agreed to go ahead with the abortion, sent her the money. When I asked what the doctor did, she said she had to take two pills and in two days she should go their again but she couldn't explain what the doctor is gonna do then.
Despite her trustful voice and act I still had doubts because when I asked her if she got the money she denied but then she said she haven't checked the bank account because she paid with the card. I have never met a doctor in Thailand who accepts credit cards for payment but maybe she just mentions that she got the money from the ATM and didn't check her income amount. These speculations made me slowly sick. I had many doubts however the explanations she mentions can sometimes fit,
I also had to consider that this is another culture and people act different so also things which seem to be unlikely can be true.
I was calling and calling her again, asking her so many questions, hoping that she would do a mistake. Then I realized that she wrote down her birthday on her Skype account. I remembered when she said that in the night where the fight happened that it is her birthday. I told her that and she just said according to the two different dates that her friends birthday was this night and not hers. I couldn't really remember, however I got the feeling that she said it was her birthday and not of her friend, but I had to accept what she says cause my memory was weak. I kept asking about the baby if it is aborted now or not, she said "Yes, don't worry, today got my period" and she also asked me if I wanna see her period. That was too much for me and I believed her. I had all the information I needed for making my conscience gratify, however not 100%.
My conscience felt better, however it was not 100% clear because I haven't checked it with my own eyes.
After 14 month of traveling in Australia and South-East Asia I finally arrived home, but also realized that it's not more the same, I kept thinking if all this was a lie, or if just the abortion was a lie and she still has the baby. I was thinking about blocking her on Skype but then I didn't because in case she kept the baby and want to contact me one day it would be better to not block her.
After 2 months of being at home I realized that I needed 100% clarity of my conscience for getting back my happiness. I have to mention that the girl has never texted or contacted me in that time since I am home so I was confident that all went good and there is no more reason to keep in touch. One day I couldn't withstand to contact her how she feels just for making sure that there is no reason to worry about.
Like it happened all the time in Thailand she didn't write back, but called me again.
I was scared of this call, I was scared of a 26-year old girl's call, I was scared to fall back again in to that gap of uncertainty and inner pain.
According to the question how she is going, I got that puking smiley again, the same which I got on Koh Tao. Memories were coming up, I started sweating, my face turned red and I was praying to God that all these things do not start again. I was prematurely happy when she told me that it came from the beer and shells she had last night. I tried to refer to the pregnancy topic by making intimations if her stomach is ok after this abortion. I am honest when I say that nobody in the world deserves it to ever get into the situation like this girl set me by saying that she still has the baby and that the abortion didn't work. I wanted to vomit, cry and not being anymore of this world. All the pain and uncertainty I replaced appeared again, like in a nightmare! I was still friendly but in me more and more aggression came, aggression against this girl, aggression why all this happened to me and why all was against me. For my 20 years, that all was too much.
I told all my mum, started crying and couldn't do anything else than think about this topic. The strange thing on this part of the story was again that she just told me this when I started asking her. My mom told me that my questions were the foundation
for her lies. She also sad I have put the words in her mouth. And it was true. When I consider everything, I just got the information that she is pregnant because I asked all these questions.
I tried to find out and ask her why the abortion didn't work. She couldn't explain and I kept asking if the pills were not strong enough and she said yes.
Like my mom said, I am giving her the foundation to lie. I started to get aggressive because all this was pulling on my nerves.
I told her to give me her address, Facebook name and asked what is with the 8,000 baht which I gave her for the abortion. She said I can have the money back but probably she thought I would never ask to get it back even when she offers me that. I said yes, yes I want the money back.
According to this demand she told me that she just got 40% of the money from the doctor back. I was sick of all that and didn't know what to believe. She further told me that she is gonna change the address soon and when the baby is born she will take it back to her mom and she has already got a name for it and she is gonna soon open a restaurant with her mom. I asked her to show me her stomach and she did, however the quality of her fake IPad was a catastrophe. She was never thin and always had a belly, despite she tried to convince me with her stomach that after 3 month of pregnancy her stomach has already changed the form.
According to the demand to give me her Facebook name she refuses that by saying that her family and friends shouldn't know me. My opinion is that she just don't wanna give me the chance to ask her friends about her and to see what is going on in her life, but that's my opinion… She also said I shouldn't worry, I can have another baby, it's hers and I don't have to care. This sounded for me as she wanna shake me off.
My mom and me came to the conclusion that I can't change anything and it is better to brake off contact. I did that and left her a message where I am saying that she just should contact me when the baby is born. I told her that I don't wanna
take her baby away but I would be happy to see it when its born cause it's also from me and I am also not heartless. She told me that she spoke with her mum and I am allowed to see it but I shouldn't really take it to my home.
I really don't know what I to believe and planned to fly to Chiang Mai in 4 months to check if she is really pregnant or not. I need that for my conscience and for getting my real life back with happiness and my joy of life. Maybe I will never find out when she is not giving me her address but then the probability that she never had a baby from me is higher.
All in all there are a lot of points which are against her:
1. She lied concerning her age and birth date.
2. She said she forgot the morning after pill.
3. She said that the pharmacy woman told her that the morning after pill has no more impact after 24 hours after the sex and not like 72 hours like its common.
4. I found lots of these morning after pills under her stuff.
5. The tuktuk driver warned me by saying she goes with many boys.
6. The other girl probably tried to warn me from her.
7. She said she got her period and later she still has the baby.
8. In the beginning she said she cant get pregnant cause she already got one baby and one abortion, doctor has told her that.
9. She said she just got 40 % money of the failed abortion back ( Never heard about something like that).
10. Mentioned very early just a few days after we had sex that she is not hungry and very sleepy (too early these symptoms).
11. Also mentioned that somebody stole money from her room.
12. She never mentioned me directly that she is pregnant. She just did that when I asked. (Gave her the foundation to lie?!)
I don't know what I should believe, but living with this uncertainty makes me sick!
This woman has obviously told you many lies and the story has changed so many times it is impossible to say what s the truth and what isn't. It's a shame you didn't take the chance to look when she said her period had arrived.
I get the feeling – and it is nothing more than a feeling – that she is playing with you and doing it for fun. I could be misreading it completely and it's really hard to say based on what you have written but it's almost as if she is playing games with you. When a Thai woman claims to have fallen pregnant to a Western guy, usually all the communication is from her because she wants to get money out of the guy. But in this case she has not tried that – and the face that you are quite young and probably not considered to be a great catch financially makes me feel this is not about money at all.
Given your state of mind it sounds like you're going to have to get this checked out once and for all to see if she is pregnant or not. Here's hoping she is not, because if she is, then the concern is then going to be whether it's yours or not…