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Aftermath of a Trip to Thailand

  • Written by Anonymous
  • January 3rd, 2014
  • 8 min read




She is 44, an absolute stunner…a mix of nationalities, slender with long legs, big breasts and a nice tight butt. Think of that female signer ‘Beyonce’ and you get the picture…she is my wife of 20 years.

Self-employed business women with intelligence and passion. Mother of our two children. She is beautiful, but what a temper.

We live in a place called ‘Suburbia’. Great place to raise a family but boring. If you are in to BBQs, school sports days and family time at the beach, this is the place for you.

Yes, responsible parents. Yes, play things by the book. Yes, spend time with family but hey, life is short and we need down time…

Adventure, illicit sex, drugs and making as much money as I can to fund this lifestyle is what we are both about.

Group of old warhorses planned their 25th trip to Thailand…would I like to come? Spoke to my wife, “Go ahead darling, just make sure you don’t end up in jail and oh, by the way, take your own condoms.” Got to love that women! Ticket booked and accommodation sorted at the Nana.

Alcohol is a great way to waste time on a 10-hour flight and sitting next to a stunning Chinese girl heading back to KL after a holiday in New Zealand was the icing on the cake. Sex in a plane's toilet is one of those little things that everyone needs to try sometime in one’s life.

Nana Hotel has a large room somewhere close to top floor…stripper pole, 3 large double beds, two bathrooms and a stunning view of a polluted skyline….let the adventure begin.

Best part of the Nana is the breakfast. It’s not about the food, it's about the discussion about events from the previous night. It’s the stories told over a coffee, it’s the swapping of information, it’s about recommendation of which girls we should sample, it’s about the new bars we find and the dramas of extracting the girl from the room the next day…

One of the more bizarre instances I found myself in was spending time in the Arab quarter at Soi 3. Never a smoker but wanted to sample Sheesa. So off I go to sample the Arab delights. The Arab women intrigue me. What is hidden that is so nice? Are they beautiful or ugly? What are they doing in the adult entertainment district?

Sheesa smoking is fun, and drinking only mango juice is great for one’s health, for a night anyway. Chilling out, letting the evening drift by was a relaxing time compared to the 3 previous days. Arab girl sitting across from me dressed in black tent with a veil looking at my direction…..approach her for a chat would be rude not too…reckon if a guy is well dressed, smiles and is polite you can get most things you need / want…long story cut short is that Arab women (or this one in particular) came to Bangkok to shag as many ‘Christians’ as possible…me being one of them. Found out that nothing special under the veil, rather dumpy and why don’t they at very least do so personal grooming in the hair department down below? Have to be careful though as those Arab guys whilst ok to talk with about football or cars, don’t like it one bit when you start eying up their women….anyway, didn’t come to Thailand to shag Arabs.

Rather overwhelmed by Bangkok at this stage and wasn’t sleeping that well so off I went to the chemist close to Nana. Nice old bloke and explained my problem…disappears out the back and comes back with a foil strip of 10 tablets…what’s the instructions I ask?…”don’t get caught with them on the street” he states. Brilliant, let’s give them a try…..Xanax is a rather interesting drug and whilst cured my problem it has an unintended downside of reducing your desire to have sex and also mixed with alcohol you have these bizarre hallucinations…thankfully travelling with friends means that your back is covered and we all shared these tablets one memorable evening over bottles of Johnny Walker black…and a few girls entertaining us on the stripper pole in the room. Absolutely brilliant.

Flight to Chang Mai was a breeze, nice place and found a couple of really nice massage places to relax after my time in Bangkok. Plans to do all the wild and adventurous things up there….didn’t happen…found opium, a boat on the river and spent the next 5 days with my mates getting hammered and once going to the annual cricket tournament that is / was held in March each year.

Don’t understand cricket but have ability to tackle most sports and tried not to make a fool of myself when roped into a team due to another player's injury…6 bottles of Chang beer, a hit on some Thai weed, cheers from my friends and off I went. 30 seconds later hunched over in agonising pain after being hit by a full toss in my testicles without protection. Condoms provide protection from the worrisome things in life but a packet of condoms quickly stuffed down your pants as a groin protector in cricket isn’t one of them.

Soi 33 is a much quieter place and whilst more expensive it gives one the chance to meet a so called ‘university educated girl’.

Mine wasn’t…she came from a place called Loei, fantastic in bed, good looking girl with the ability to communicate which is always a bonus when in a foreign country. No education but street smart and a cheerful personality. She had these remarkable big breasts and after 3 years pondering the situation still cannot figure if they were fake or real. Asked her once and all she did was give me an enigmatic smile and rubbed them in my face.

She became the ‘one’, my friends couldn’t find me…one stage they got reception to enter my room as they hadn’t heard from me for a couple of days and thought I was dead. The day came and I had to say goodbye to my one true love. Putting her in a taxi was a sad moment. Tears welled up on the flight home…I would be back.

Guilt washed over me upon entering the arrivals hall back in NZ. I needed to buy ‘wife’ something to absolve my guilt. Wives can be very expensive and note to self, presents don’t make the situation better.

Arriving home to normality was difficult. Kids running around, wife entertaining some girlfriends…life hadn’t stopped, but I had.

Wanted to be back in Thailand, wanted out of the marriage. Wanted to be back in the arms and breasts of my one true love. Hang on a minute, my wife is stunning, she owns 50% of the houses and businesses. I needed a plan….

Suburbia and routine gives you that comfort, but on flipside got me thinking too much…first stop was to family doctor. Been getting pressure to shag the wife and needed to ensure all safe in that department. Had been careful (overly so, much to the hilarity of some of the bar girls but hey, you only have one life). Doctor gave me the once over. Nice old girl who had seen it all before but rather stressful when she is peering down the top of my penis and wanted to discuss a cricket ball hitting my old fella. Three months in…HIV test (been celibate all that time from wife and had run out of excuses).

Did you know in NZ that if they test in morning they have the results back the following day? Bloody doctor kept me waiting 7 days….if a problem will ring me for a chat. Every time the phone rang, my heart-rate doubled. Sick of all the bullshit and rang the doc. Oh, she says, just wanted you to contemplate life and consequences of your actions….by the way got your results 24 hours after your visit and you're negative. Must be a female thing and girl power all working together to teach us guys a lesson…

Time to get on with life and move past missing ‘Pon’. Can’t do it. Wife senses something (perhaps the texts late at night are a giveaway – Christ, stupid at time). She is pissed, she is jealous, she wants to teach me a lesson. “Hang on a minute, love, you gave me the green light to go to Thailand!” Nothing makes sense to her and quick smart I am standing outside on our bedroom balcony in the middle of winter with all entry in to the family home barred… As luck would have it the kids trampoline is only a 10-foot drop from our bedroom balcony…one twisted ankle later whilst laying on the ground, with no money / mobile or car keys…I am thinking that there has to be a better way to solve this problem…

Comprise is a great word, and whilst difficult to swallow your pride, 20 years of marriage means you learn things along the way.

Do I want to split the assets, do I want to be a weekend dad…heck no, but I still want to enjoy life and to be frank, I want to have it both ways…

Oh. I am humble and I am polite, I work hard in our businesses, I show that love is still alive in the relationship. Over a period of two years, things turn the corner. Business is successful, wife has got over the drama and all is well in the world. Women are so strange but one day she says to me….”You need a break, why not go back to Thailand for some R and R?” Never one to miss an opportunity but at this stage very wary, my plan to play it cool and humble worked….

Upon my arrival back at Nana and an overwhelming desire to stay away from ‘Pon’ but my heart still tugging me back, another adventure opened up for me…


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