My Bangkok Story
I am 37 and a virgin (or was – more on this later). I’ve had a few girlfriends, with the last one being a couple of years ago, but for one reason or another I never actually did the deed. I am not that socially-awkward, as readers may have already assumed, and most would be shocked at the revelation that I am a (near-enough) 40 year old virgin. I’m not doing this to invite ridicule from readers, but it’s important to set the context for what is about to follow.
I found myself in Bangkok on an extended layover for a couple of days, and curiosity got the better of me and I did the circuit of gogo bars (though I generally found them not to my tastes). Also, after 37 years of abstinence, I figured it was time to just get it over with. This was more an intellectual exercise than a strictly erotic one – I just needed to know what sex with a real woman felt like (this sounds incredibly sad I know, but believe me my life is otherwise really rich and fulfilling – sans intercourse!).
I perused the hallowed pages of the Stickman tome and settled upon one particular princess that you have featured before. And so it was that I found myself, a little nervous and shy, in my hotel room with an extremely attractive lady. I wanted to dig in to the minibar to calm my nerves, but I chose to remain stone-cold sober instead for what I was expecting to be a life-changing experience.
I made it clear to the lady from the outset that I was a first-timer. I’m not sure why, but I did. The questions went from – “Oh, first time in Bangkok?” to “No? Then first time with Bangkok girl?” and so on – each step excruciatingly awkward. When I finally let rip that it was my first time for EVERYTHING, she was surprised but, to her eternal credit, really gracious about it.
We spent the first half hour or so talking. I asked her a lot of questions about her life, and she seemed honest and forthcoming. Naively perhaps, it was important to me that she wasn’t just a hooker, but a person with a name, a background, a story.
Things got a little heated and hands started roving. Everything up to this point is familiar to me, so I wasn’t a complete starfish. No need to go into details here (I’m sure your loyal readership are well aware of the machinations), so I’ll skip to the end.
About two minutes after my life’s first insertion and into the natural movements which followed, I abruptly stopped. It was not a lack of arousal – this girl was absolutely gorgeous. Being a greenhorn, of course I was clueless and very fumbly, but it wasn’t even that. It was a sudden realisation that my dream went poof and I just didn’t want to go any further.
My “package” included two rounds but I didn’t even make it to one (or anywhere near for that matter). She thought it was her fault and she kept asking why and insisting I continue (in hindsight, maybe it’s because she was enjoying it, but I was so amateurish it’s unlikely!). She seemed genuinely upset and really wanted to please.
After making clear to her I really was done, I explained why.
I must first say here that I really make no moral judgments on anyone. Remember I had a hooker in my hotel room, so I’m as diabolical as the next dirty farang. But I realised that while I was certainly physically aroused, there was no intimacy at all. None of the deep desire and longing (on a level that transcends lust) that I had experienced with previous girls who I genuinely loved and was close to. It was just, well, sex. And it was a little boring.
Also, I couldn’t help feel that while it was her choice to earn money this way, I had gotten to know her sufficiently well to know that I didn’t want to propagate the "use" of this beautiful person (inside and out) under these circumstances.
After convincing her that it really wasn’t her, but that I realised for me, emotional and physical union are one and cannot be separated and I felt she deserved better (again, no judgments on anyone!!!), she calmed down a bit and we spent an hour in the dark, locked in a naked embrace (sheath still on!) and talked. I was only supposed to have her for an hour or so – she ended up staying for three, and left only because it was getting late and I felt she needed to get home before the dogs came out to play.
We spent the last half-hour or so going through photos of her life, her family, her acts of charity, talking about dreams, hopes and desires – even chatting candidly about her work. This really was the so-called “GFE” and if it wasn’t for the echoes of legions of broke and broken-hearted Stickman readers playing in the back of my mind, I may just have fallen for this girl in a big way. At one point she wept while sharing with me some of her life (incidentally the tears had nothing at all to do with her line of work).
I made sure to keep things strictly on-the-level, all whilst being genuinely interested in what she had to share with me, but eventually I said it was getting late and for her own sake she should leave. I opened the hotel door for her, but before she stepped out she closed it and turned to give me a big bear hug (not sure whether this is the norm?). I walked her to her taxi and we said our goodbyes, but not without me first slipping her a sizeable tip.
She asked if I would look her up again if I’m ever in town so we can enjoy some time together as friends. As tempting as it is to do this (she is easily among the hottest girls I have seen in Thailand, and that’s saying something!), I know this can only lead to a world of pain so I acknowledge (a little painfully) that I will probably never see her again.
So here I am, back home a couple of weeks later, reflecting on all that happened on that day. At the moment, I can categorically say (again without judgment to anyone else) that was the last time I will ever pay for sex, because I believe myself unable to enjoy it without true intimacy. If that means I never experience it again, so be it – life goes on.
I am also a little less critical about the sex industry in Bangkok – for sure there are many in the world who are forced into sex slavery, and this should be abhorred, but for this lady, it was weighing the needs of her family and community back in the village versus the earning potential and her admission that it is not her first choice of profession (putting it mildly). But the bottom line is she wilfully chose this line of work with her eyes wide open.
Overall, I am glad I took the step and look upon that encounter with a lot of fondness. The part I enjoyed the most was talking, sharing, connecting. In fact, though technically I no longer carry the V-card, the reality is the banging itself is but a distant memory and I look forward to burning the V card again in future under right and genuine circumstances.
The Land of Smiles beguiles for a number of reasons, and for many Stick loyalists, it is the allure of a non-stop stream of fornication with some of God’s finest creations. I wish these loyalists all the best, but my story takes a different turn, and I think I am all the richer for it.