Stickman Readers' Submissions September 6th, 2013

Ladyboys: Do Not Judge a Book by its Cover

I first travelled to Thailand in the fall of 2001. I planned a 4-day holiday to Bangkok and I stayed at Nana Hotel. I did all my research about the bar girls before my trip and I was very ready to hunt when my plane landed at Don Meuang Airport. When I did my pre-trip research I came across some information on ladyboys. Well, being American and raised in a Christian household, the idea of ladyboys disgusted me. I could not imagine ever finding a ladyboy attractive much less wanting to have sex with one!

So during my first trip I saw many ladyboys in Nana Plaza and I was not attracted to them at all. I was also a little afraid of them because of the research I did prior to my trip. So I avoided ladyboys like the plague during my first trip!

My second trip was in the Spring of 2002 and now I was a fully fledged LOS addict. When I was back in my country of residence all I did was think about Thailand. When I landed at Don Meuang Airport I had no intention of meeting any ladyboys. I was once again staying at Nana Hotel and all I wanted to do was meet some lovely ladies and have a little P4P fun. Well a funny thing happened one night at Nana Plaza. When I was sitting at one of the beer bars outside Nana Plaza I saw this beautiful creature walk by me. I got up from my seat and followed her to her bar. I was surprised to see her walk into one of the ladyboy bars! I was shocked when I found out she was a ladyboy! I was also a little confused. I wondered what did my attraction to a ladyboy said about my own sexuality? Was I gay? No way! I was a straight man and this was just an accident. I drank more than usual that night to forget I was ever attracted to a ladyboy!

After returning to my homeland I found myself thinking more and more about that lovely ladyboy I saw at Nana Plaza. I could not get her out of my mind! I started to look at ladyboys on the Internet and I discovered I was sexually attracted to them. Was I gay? I was quite confused about my own sexuality!

So in the fall of 2002, I made my third trip to LOS and stayed at Nana Plaza once again. On my first night I sat in the middle of Nana Plaza drinking a few beers and watching the ladies and ladyboys arrive for work. I knew deep down inside of me what I was going to do that night. After about 5 glasses of liquid courage I ventured up the back stairs of Nana Plaza where I eventually ran into (literally) a lovely ladyboy with blond hair and an incredible body. She grabbed my hand and led me into Casanova Bar. I sat down and looked at the lovely ladyboys. It was after one more drink that I took the first step into my present reality. I bar barfined a lovely ladyboy and went to the short time hotel in Nana Plaza. I made the ladyboy meet me at the hotel because I was embarrassed to be seen with a ladyboy! It was a life changing one hour inside that room! I was officially a ladyboy lover!

Initially I was just attracted to ladyboys for sex. Whenever I barfined a ladyboy I made them walk behind me because I was still ashamed to be seen with them. This behavior lasted for 3 more trips to Thailand and during that time I met more than 20 ladyboys. It was during this time that I experienced many emotions concerning my love for ladyboys. I loved having sex with ladyboys but I did not find men attractive. Based upon that I concluded I was not gay. Now I do not care what anybody labels me. I am very comfortable with who I am and what I like.

I also started to learn many things about ladyboys. I learned that they truly believe that they were born a woman. In fact they believe they were born in the wrong body. I have a great deal of respect for ladyboys to have the courage to live the life they want to live despite any public ridicule or discrimination they might face. I have learned that ladyboys are much like any other person. They want to find somebody to love. They want to have a normal life but do not have the opportunities like "normal" people have. They face much discrimination. Just look around Nana Plaza and see the signs on some bars stating "No Ladyboys." Even though they are marginally accepted by Thai culture, they still face much discrimination.

I will now jump to my current situation. I am back in my home country and am in a relationship with a ladyboy. Within 10 years I have made the transformation from fearing ladyboys to having a relationship with one. I am no longer interested in having a relationship with a normal girl. I find ladyboys much more attractive and interesting than normal ladies.

Ladyboys are people. They are people that have the same dreams as anybody else. They want to have a normal life and find a true love. They want to be accepted as part of society and not face discrimination. My love and acceptance of ladyboys has been a 12 year journey. It is my hope that everyone will see ladyboys as people rather than freaks. Please take time to get to know some ladyboys before you judge them. Open up your mind and give them a chance. I do not expect all people will want to have a relationship with a ladyboy like I have chosen but next time you see a ladyboy please do not pass judgment like I did many years ago.

Stickman's thoughts:

I'm curious about what your Christian family makes of you being in a relationship with a ladyboy…now what would make for a good read! How does one maintain a relationship with someone there family strongly disapproves of?

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