You can squeeze 1500 baht in to her purse as you leave the Short-time room, or buy her dinner with wine, or a new car and jewelry or a house, but there is always a cost. Free sex is generally much too expensive and paying for sex is a more economical way to go. It also defines the relationship. The girls are part of a service industry and a reasonable fee is part of the contract. It can also help the woman justify what she is doing. It’s not moral or immoral, it’s a job. The most honest relationship between a male and a female is between a man and a whore – both parties know exactly what is going on. We are not lovers, we are customers.
Two stories to illustrate the point. Kitti and Gym.
Kitti came to work at my company. I was senior management and she was an entry level employee, which was a very accurate term. The first time I saw her, I wanted to enter her and the feeling never changed. She was small, cute, friendly and a little chubby – very tasty.
As I never work and play at the same site, I got to know her, arranged that we work on a project together, went for coffee together, took her out to eat, but made no move. As she was less than half my age she was flattered and obviously liked my company. I told her many times how much I was attracted to her and hinted that I wanted to have sex with her and could help her with her expenses. She had a regular Thai boyfriend and the families were planning for them to marry, but they spent little time together and she was full of doubts about him. We talked a lot about this.
I was transferred to another subsidiary company in a different city and now I knew it was time to make my move. One night I met her after work I took her to a friend’s unoccupied condo and within a few minutes we were in the bedroom and we did the naughties. As it was over a year since we first met the relief was enormous. When we had finished I opened her purse and put money in to it. She was surprised and said that was not necessary, but I insisted and told her again what I had told her before, that ours was not a love-affair and just as at work people were rewarded for good work, she should be paid her for her good work. I also told her that she never needed to tell her boyfriend about us as it was not ‘love’ but a part time job for her — this explanation she really liked. After about a year of meeting 2 or 3 times a month, the passion faded and we decided to end it. The last time we said goodbye I said, “I will really miss you and your sweet little pussy and she said, “I’ll really miss the money” — perfect. The payments defined the relationship.
2. I called her Gym because our meetings were like an athletic work-out, no emotion but physically exciting. I met her at Gulliver’s. She was a part-timer as she had a regular job in a pharmacy. She was over 40 and passed the cute stage but she is a very elegant, good looking woman. After the first date we met by appointment at a short-time hotel about twice a month. She was very punctual, very efficient and worth every penny. She was very much in charge and directed the course of our short-time. She never used my name and always referred to me as her customer. Conversation was brief, we both knew why we were meeting. I was very happy with her and to this day we still meet. One day, after about 6 months of meeting, I got a call from her sister. Gym was in hospital and had had her appendix removed. I was surprised at how worried I was. I went to the hospital with her sister and gave the head nurse a few thousand baht to get her a better room and care. After discharge she stayed at the empty appt. and then went back north to recover.
I saw her 8 weeks later. We went for our usual short-time but the mood was different. She was warmer and softer and used my name. When we had finished I pulled out my wallet, she said No and waved my payment away, but I insisted and gave her the usual fee. She said “You nice man.” I said, “I am nice customer.” The payment defined our relationship, I did not want it changed. It hasn’t. She likes to see me, our meetings are now very friendly but not loving.
I absolutely understand that some people prefer to keep things transactional, be they the female or the male.
Of the 2 ladies you mention here, Kitti sounds like the type of woman I personally would not want anything to do with and Gym was a prostitute (nothing wrong with that and I mean it not in a derogatory way, but let’s be frank – she sells sex for money so she’s a prostitute).
There are plenty of women out there who want to meet a good guy and they would be shocked at the idea of taking money, be it directly, or indirectly. There ARE women out there who wish to pay their way and for whom being treated to dinner is only acceptable on a first date or special occasion, the sort of women who don’t wish to take advantage of others.
I think the problem with transactional relationships is that some guys think all women are like this – and they absolutely aren’t. To suggest that this is how all women are is misogynistic. If we were to go full circle, there is an argument that those guys who feel all relationships with women are transactional is because putting their hand in their pocket and paying is the only way they can actually get to spend time with women….