What’s Not Reality?
"Why would you bother to think about sex you pay for?" was said to me a few years back by a Thai doctor I know in Bangkok who lived 15 of his 55 years in the USA and can communicate to me in a way few Thais can. His further elaboration regarded how prostitutes are in America to help me see the point.
Living here in Pattaya for the past 8 years, and Phuket the 2 before that, I meet farangs on vacation all the time. I read here at Stickman's site often about guys who are married to ex gogo girls and say they are happy. Seems possible if the girl is average and in her 30s, is my opinion. Why would a sexy girl give up $3,000 – $5,000 per month in high season earnings to go live with an old guy on the farm unless she has significant material gain, and that is what they seek! They are poor people with no government assistance, something which flanges fail to grasp. College-educated good girls make how much at the bank job, $500 a month?
And for the lonely western men coming from counties like my homeland where sex is over past 40, this is an intoxicating scene. Women know how to follow men well in a dance and if you are thinking about love here as a 260-pound, bald, 61-year old, she is sure quicker and more detached than you can imagine. But, I see it daily in the coffee shops, the mall, and pretty much everywhere in Pattaya. Isaan's pot of gold at the end of the rain bow. Walking around with elephantine old boys holding hands. Hey man, we all know it's costing you!
Rigorous self-honesty, I consider, is the best way for a person to live their life. Asking ourselves why we are here is helpful. Most will not admit it, but it is for cheap sex with women half or one third the size of girls back home. Over time one finds the humor, ease of transportation, food, and laughter in one's daily life more valuable than an act $50 bucks can get you to have with pretty much any pretty girl in Pattaya. Not to forget one lives much easier here.
The new and very lonely western man can easily go overboard at first and try to make up for the loneliness and isolation from the gender battles back home where women and men are alienated from one another with only lawyers as winners. Measure it with money, buddy, is how I want new guys to see it as I think they are better off. I have not lost over here as I read the site early and keep my finances in my awareness.
Everyday several foreigners are at the airport heading home broke trying to figure out what happened. Personally, I have given up sharing a taxi with foreigners I don't know because I am tired of listening to the sad mysteries. Stickman must get letters about everyday. Men keep asking why she doesn't have compassion for his suffering. It is because she has a different morality as a sex vendor and the more dramatic she gets, the more money a fool will throw at the problem! Cut and dry money is the gauge. But if you try and tell the guy that he defends her and you become the villain!
If you can afford her, go ahead, watch her greed grow. Because once she has made big money, no one goes for less. Anywhere on earth they do not downgrade; they always want more. If you have it (big money) and she has your emotions then fine. Good luck!
Here I see the guys who can walk alone, talk to friends, and control his own life, the happiest.
But, I am 66, 67 in a couple of days and not desirous of any more sadness in life or anyone controlling my day.
Readers can attack my approach or beliefs, it is sure ok with me. But I know how I am happy and don't know anyone angry at me because I do not promise girls a house for mama in bug eating locales, do not fret about horrific school systems for any children I might sire, which keep the brown Thais poor, and I keep it light and fun. I make no apologies for prostitutes. How else can an old man see young women? No victims in my life, myself included.
We can use the confusions we get while trying to make something like a relationship with a bargirl to protect ourselves from the next lessons. Only if you like mixing oil with water. If you don't know it by now, they have an opinion that we foreigners are less than human and are here to be exploited. If you want it to be something different than that, earn their respect by not being an idiot. Running around town with an old man's flabby body and no shirt or wearing an undershirt for some Thai beer company and not paying attention to local customs is a sure away to guarantee keeping the idiot status. When a bargirl tells you a ludicrous story, just smile and laugh your way through the bullshit. Please don't point at Thais as if they are a sight at the zoo. They are shy people and easily offended by any form of confrontation.
You can tell the foreigner who has been here a long time as he will immediately smile at you, just as the Thais do. It is an effective disarmament tool and a great greeting as well. There are very many happy old fallings here, be one. or go home broke.
Stickman's thoughts:
It's easy to see why you don't just survive here, you thrive here. It's all in the attitude but more importantly, the honesty.