Instinct – Reply to Bokbefok

I have been reading everything on this website since I came back from my trip to Thailand a year and a half ago. I vote for Bokbefok’s submission Advice for Lost Kiwi
as the best submission on this website. Such a level headed guy took the words out of my mouth. I wish I could sit down with him for a beer and have a chat on any topic. Since Bokbefok did not leave his email address for contact, I would like to tell
him here that if he would like to chat on the phone or exchange an email message with me, I give my consent to Stickman to provide him with my email address.

My guess is that Stickman did not give his thoughts about Bokbefok’s submission because the submission may be considered politically incorrect. I would add to Bokbefok’s words that there is another difference between us and “Turd world” mentality. We care about political correctness. To them it is a joke (if they ever heard about such an idea).

The word that grabbed my attention the most in Bokbefok’s submission is: “Instinct”. Wow. I thought about this word in relation to third world people a lot before reading Bokbefok’s submission. These people live by instinct. And before some readers entertain the idea that these people live by instinct because it is natural for survival and they can’t afford the luxury that we have. Supposedly, because we have the necessary basic materials for physical survival, we can afford to move up in Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Nonsense. My impression is that people in Southeast Asia are not capable of moving up beyond physiological needs.

Maslow's hierarchy of needs

An interpretation of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, represented as a pyramid with the more basic needs at the bottom

Like Bokbefok, I met a woman in Bangkok and I had no evidence she was ever a bargirl, but in Thailand you never know. I have long since accepted I will never know the truth although I had my suspicions. And Like Bokbefok, I got rid of her. Marrying a prostitute is not an option for a man with any screws left in his head (Why do I have even to make such an understatement?). When she needed to eat, she would turn into an animal. When she needed to shit, she would do it in the middle of a phone conversation. When she needed to f@#$, you could not stop her with a gun. When she needed to sleep, you could die in front of her and she would simply go to sleep.

Some readers might say: “There we go again. Another middle-aged man who fell in love with a prostitute in Thailand and now he is making generalizations about the population of half a continent”. Well, that is not the case.

I was married to a Filipina woman. No, I did not meet her in the Philippines. She definitely was not a prostitute (not in the sense of having sex for money with strangers). She did not even like sex. Now, I don’t know if you guys have noticed, but Southeast Asian women who live in Farangland have a different attitude from what they had in their homelands. They don’t need us for citizenship. But their “philosophy” is the same. Her idea of marriage was that her money is her money and my money is our money. In fact, my money had no value unless she benefited from it. A husband is a job. Why would she cook for me or have sex with me unless she got money for it? It made no sense to her. What is a husband for? Love was bullshit for her. A husband could be anybody as long as she got money out of him. Family? Of course. She is very family oriented (unlike westerners). Her family is her father, her mother, her sisters, her brothers, her friends and her neighbors in the Philippines. Her husband is another job for helping her family who sit drunk the whole day in their village. When she needed to eat, she would turn into an animal. When she needed to shit, she would do it in the middle of a phone conversation. When she needed to fuck, she would allow me to satisfy her. When she needed to sleep, you could die in front of her and she would simply go to sleep. Sounds familiar?

And no. She was not younger than I am. She was not good looking. She really did not have anything to offer me. Never mind why I married her. It was a mistake. I have never met anybody in the west who lives by such pure instinct.

Some people (westerners of course) might say: “You can not generalize from your experience with two women. This is just prejudice. You are a person who made bad choices and you are taking out your frustration”. All I have to say is that Bokbefok has the same opinion based on his experience. Bokbefok was replying to the “Lost Kiwi” who had the same experience. Is this an academic survey? Is this a scientifically based conclusion? No. It is reality. No further studies needed. I consider myself to be a person who does not have a drop of prejudice in his bones. I also think that there is a difference between being an ignorant bigot and a gullible educated westerner who can’t see reality. It is one thing to hate a person because of his ethnicity. It is another thing to believe that “life insurance” has anything to do with life as opposed to death. One of my biggest struggles in life is trying not to be prejudiced against anybody while not being blind to the differences among cultures.