Stickman Readers' Submissions August 9th, 2012

It’s My Life, My Story

This is a recount of my experiences for newbies or people that found love and not for mongers (leave the pigs in the sty please). There is a lot of negativity in stories about different girls. First, put this into a little bit of perspective – if you wrote the same stories about western women would you actually find anything different if your sourcing them from same industry!

My story…

Mid 40’s worked in country then university and into the corporate world with reasonable salary. First trip overseas was Thailand and Cambodia. Been in and out of various bars however would not call myself a monger. Short time has never really been my thing although have had the best sex I ever had and I am still amazed where she learnt those things.

He Clinic Bangkok

I had been to Thailand about 4 times, knew how to get around Nana and soi 4. Knew where to eat and get cheap accommodation etc. Each trip I liked to go to somewhere different although stop originally in Bangkok for a bit of fun. About a year ago, after a very exhausting year, I stopped in Pattaya and was heading for Koh Chang. Flight got in 6 AM so plan was to catch bus to Pattaya, stay 1 – 2 nights then head off again. Be a bit of a naughty boy and relax.

Here everything changed! I needed food first then I thought a massage was in order. Hadn’t had one in years!

I met some someone there and we really clicked. Yes she was from Isaan, and I also worked in the outback for a long time so we joke about cows. Decided yep, let’s go to Koh Chang together, what can I lose? Had a fantastic week with her (yes, paying but not much) and I cannot describe how much fun she is near water! Absolute crazy! If arguing I think just push her into swimming pool or in ocean and everything fixed! It was here looking over the sunset and having a beer she mentioned she had to have an operation!

CBD bangkok

Ohh shit. here’s the scam… All those terrible stories. Okay ignored it as I’m a well advised reader. Next day walking up the street she was talking about starting a business… what more scams… big money question coming for sure. Then she says “Maybe she could make fruit smoothies and sell them for $x”. Then she made the comment that changed my life for ever! “Maybe can sell for 20 baht but if children have no money maybe I can give for free”.

With all the corporate bullshit somehow this changed me. Corporate crap and mortgage stress just really seemed stupid! She probably didn’t know how the family was going to survive while she was not working! And somehow this made sense! Make a good product and you will get customers. Be generous and others will be also. If you’ve ever seen 20 Thai kids crowded around a street vendor you would understand this. After paying customers have theirs others are looked after.

There is a generosity in this country that is hard to put into words. I could have any sort of problem and somebody would help me in the village. I am sure if I broke a leg or something they would carry into town if a car could not be found. It’s a land that is happy and definitely the land of smiles (yeah, but not for the mongers seeking GFE who they want as whores).

Holiday finished and went back to Australia. Old man had a heart attack and caught up with work crap and didn’t keep in contact but still had her number. 12 months later I was lucky to receive a redundancy package and returned.

wonderland clinic

She did have the operation and nearly died. Her father and family travelled 100km a day on a little scooter to see her when she was in hospital.

On returning I thought I would go with as many girls I could find and be a monger! Instead I called her! And this is where my life changes!

• I have been to the village to meet everyone. She has recovered from operation although has SLE.

• Her papa is ex-army and at 56 still shows a six-pack. Uncle is an ex general.

• I go for walks with Mama to get the 4 cows in the afternoon. Neither of us can communicate at this stage but somehow it doesn’t matter. I am a legend as no other farangs do this in their village and it’s somewhat relaxing just walking with mama. Mama talks the whole time even though she knows I cannot understand. She is very proud!

• After cows home, it's whiskey time and Mama brings me a beer. Lots of people turn up. Everyone happy because Farang here. In some ways this is the ATM has arrived but then it’s not. You can have people come from nowhere and suddenly give you food.

• I pay for some food but 3 times more comes from neighbours. Everyone pays their share dependent on income somehow (find that in the corporate world).

• After Thais eat they don’t drink. But I could!

• Numerous people in the village just turn up with food! This is a story in itself.

• I help with my daughter’s homework each night and have to tell mama to put beer back in fridge. I always need cold… Thai know how to party and cold beer is a must for Aussies.

• Was I asked for money?

o Yes. Two children didn’t have money for milk at local shop owned by aunties. 200 baht! I was given 1.5 kg of beef when we left at no cost.

o Money to Papa and Mama 5,000 each. Hey I just got a $100k payout. What have they done with it? They have built another room for when I come and visit and which now (after I sent $200 for bed) is my inherited daughter room so she doesn’t sleep with papa and mama as she is getting older.

o I gave an additional 1,000 baht to mama to buy some new clothes for when she goes to temple. She is very proud now and I get praise each time.

o And I paid for coffee for 4 people when papa was playing some game like bowls. Apparently I should not have done this and Mama now has me under close eye. 100 baht maybe!

o And I now pay for my daughter’s school and clothing. $100 per month max. And I would put her maths against anyone I know and I have MBA CPA qualifications. I intend to put $20,000 aside for her in case anything happens to cover university if she so desires.

These are not rich people, however the village is not bark huts. They are a small communities of say 50 houses of which many people are related. They are corrugated iron roofs with concert floors and timber walls. They are not slums. I have been lucky because a cousin is married to an Aussie and he has fixed the house up next door with western toilet etc. I don’t know if I could have got this far without a good crapper!

I have been to Chumpon to meet her brothers who I could not speak highly enough of. They picked us up from the train, found accommodation and caught up every so often to barbeque on the beach. If you could only live like this!

When I return I hope to convince the uncle to give me pig at a cheap price and I can learn how to do the spit roast! You can shoot me that day because I’ll be in heaven!

It is a really good family with a wide range of friends. The social network is huge. I am welcomed anywhere I go and often have people who cannot speak any English always asking how I am. I have people coming back from town with food for me and don’t expect anything in return. Thais are very much you have money okay I pay, next time they have money they pay. It’s about money but it’s not about money, more so cashflow.

Socially I believe the Thais have a greater society than the west and have a greater level of emotional intelligence. Or maybe it’s just I’m back out of the corporate world. Maybe this is because they are poor and have to make do with what they have. The bar scene is actually a very small part of Thailand!

This does not include the bar scene and most of Pattaya.

My learning of Thailand / Life:

– Learn to be a little bit generous. If you help people they will help you.

– You are not going to meet your soulmate in a bar! Okay I’ll go down to the local brothel and see if a girl wants to marry me if you want to spot me $500!

Family is very important in Thailand. I have not got my head 100% around this but my Teerak will basically fall on a sword for her parents before me if required I’m sure. In return we are looked after very well and the large family very much looks after me.

– Don’t get too drunk! Thais will drink a lot but there is a cut off point. After they eat they stop and it goes behind closed doors. If in bars etc they will ply you with alcohol but you’re the ATM then and it’s their business. It’s okay to have a few more Jack Daniels but in your room.

– Thai girls don’t really want to see you drunk in front of their friends. Even bar girls if you’re looking at GFE. But then nearly everyone else is laughing at you although politely.

– Respect is huge and I think it will take many years to fully understand it if at all.

– You can read too much into a lot of the stories and drastic relationships. I don’t think many of the farangs with successful relationships would be great contributors to this site unfortunately. I have gone through the doubt. Even turned up unannounced, somewhat checking and also for surprise factor and stressed out. In then end you have a choice: live there or live in your country and save money for a holiday x times each year. Just don’t believe mongers and exotic stories.

– I know a number of the girls in the massage shop and I have never seen anyone playing up who have a genuine boyfriend. If they did, I know the boyfriends and same same the girls know me if I go astray. Is there flirting? Yes, this is how they attract customers!

– So can you meet somebody in Thailand? Yes, of course. Is a prostitute the way to go? You can answer this one for yourself… Although I did meet someone that had only just started and for reasons in Australia and me being a newbie it couldn’t happen. I truly hope she found someone good.

– I have met a number of Thai girls that have come to Australia. They are drop dead gorgeous! However, employment opportunities are slim until they speak fluent English. Most are paid less then minimum wage with no superannuation or basic protection like sick days. Heaven forbid they have an accident at work!

– Basically they are taken advantage of and their husbands don’t care and they are none the brighter.

o Would I like to bring a child up in this environment! No!

o I had someone tell me a story of someone telling their young daughter could make $300 per hour as escort. I wish I had met him personally…

I don’t think these learnings are breaking any new ground but hope they assure a few people who have doubts about love. So what am I doing? After a lot of back and forth I am making the permanent move. The Thai family is just too big and I cannot live with taking my partner's daughter away from mama and papa and then hoping we can save enough each year to return. The cost of starting a family in Australia would make this an empty promise even if you truly meant it.

Am I retirement age? No. Do I have lots of money? No. But enough to probably buy a small business and a house after a while and leave a bit invested.

Other option? Work in an office staring at a computer screen and suffering mortgage stress with falling house prices. Have a few beers at the weekend wishing I was in Thailand with my special friend.

Conclusion – You only live once and sometimes the heart should lead.

Reason I write this? A recent article had a bloke in love and then the girlfriend got raped! Get the F**k on a plane and sort it out. Would you do anything less if you had a farang girlfriend! And you know it’s probably not too late! Are you a man or a mouse? I would bet the situation is nothing like any advice you will have received.

nana plaza