Readers' Submissions

From a Thai Woman’s Heart

  • Written by Sugar Cane
  • January 24th, 2012
  • 5 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok

Hello to All Wonderful Farangs!

I would love to share with you about my personal love story. This happened in 1995 in Thailand. While working at a bank, I met an American man named Scott. Scott was an English teacher at one of the top universities in Thailand.

Apparently, I was in an English program where Scott was teaching. This program is for graduates who wanted to receive a tour guide license. Scott was my English teacher. While I was in the program, I did not have any clues that he was interested in me. Who would have ever thought that a teacher would have a crush on me? I was innocent then!

After I completed the English program, Scott invited me to go out with him. We started dating and fell in love…

Then, I asked him to marry me. This might sound strange that a woman asked a man to marry her.

I asked him to marry me because I loved him and wanted him. Since I was seven years old, I had always dreamed of getting married with an American man. There he was! God sent!

When I proposed to him, he said “I don’t have money. I don’t have a home in America. I have nothing. I am a fat farang. I am poor. I am old. Why do you want to be with me?”

He was 12 years older than me. I was 25 years old. He was over 200 lbs.

I said “I don’t care about what you say to yourself. I love you just the way you are. I don’t care that you are poor. I don't want your money. What I want is you.”

He said “I am scared.”

He was afraid that I would leave him for someone who had more money than he did.

I said “If you love me, that is more than enough. We can survive.”

We had that conversation for a long time. Until one day he accepted my proposal.

That was not the end of the story. As a Thai woman, in our culture, I must have had approval from my parents. I went home one day and told my parents that I would get married with a poor farang who had no money for the dowry. My father said to me “I will not go to your wedding. You are not my daughter. If you are going to get married with an American, why don’t you get married with someone who has a lot of money?”

My groom had nothing, but himself, and I did not care. I loved him very much. I would do anything to be with him even if I had to break the rules! I never give up on what I want.

Nothing stopped me from being with the man I loved. In 1996, Scott and I had our wedding at a Thai temple in Bangkok without the dowry and without my father to witness our love. My mother, grandmother, sisters, relatives, and a few friends attended our wedding.

What I did was not approved by my father and many people in Thai society.

I did the right thing because I followed my heart. I never regret. I broke the rules of the Thai society. I left Thailand to the unknown to be with my husband in America. Our love journey was like a roller coaster. Scott had to go through tremendous obstacles and difficulties to bring me to the U.S. With perseverance and our love for each other, we made it. He wanted to take me to see the U.S. because he said that I deserved it. He wanted me to be happy. (Even though I have a B.A. And a tour guide license, many people in Thailand (not ALL) looked down on me because of the way I look. I have a flat nose, thick lips, and dark skin.) Yes, I am an Isaan girl.

In life, I have learned that I can't control what others might think about me. What I can control is my own state of mind. I am responsible for every thought, word, and deed.

Back to the story…

In the U.S., Scott and I never had a house. We had always struggled with money. That was not a problem for us because our love was stronger than the barriers that we had to face. We were homeless a couple times. One time while walking along a street in California, he sang this song “Even though we ain’t got money, I’m so in love with you honey. Everything will bring a chain of love…” All we had was 2 pennies in his pocket. That was it. All we had was 2 pennies. We had no home, no car, no money in the bank account, no credit card, nothing but our strong bond of love.

Scott and I had 5 wonderful years together. In 2000, we learned that he had lung cancer. He passed away in 2001. He is always in my heart. My love for him never dies.

The point of my story is that true love exists. If Scott could find someone who loved him truly, so can YOU! You deserve to have your Thai woman to love you, cherish you, and appreciate you. If you are searching for true love from a Thai women, you will find her! The right person will love and accept you for who you truly are. There are some Thai women who are non-materialistic. There are such Thai women who value love highly. Open your heart. Love will find you and you will find it.
Thank you for reading!

With Love,
Sugarcane

P.S. I welcome your comment. Please contact me at [email protected]



Stickman's thoughts:

What a nice surprise to read such a positive story like this!