Stickman Readers' Submissions October 15th, 2011

The Story So Far

Having been an avid Stickman reader, and learning so much from other writers and their experiences I thought I would pen my story to date.

I have always liked Asian women and found them to be so pleasing on the eye, not to say Western women are not as a lot of them are, it's just a personal preference really. Plus I don’t hate Western women, some of them are my best friends that
I play tennis with or go to the gym with.

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My first attempt at dating a Filipina I met online was disastrous. I did everything wrong which I now know and am lucky to have come out unscathed. Again I don’t hate Filipinas and it was my own fault really for not approaching the task in hand
with the correct knowledge really. Would I date a Filipina again? Sure, why not, but I would choose using what I know now as a benchmark for dating.

Why was it so disastrous you ask? Well she left college early because the family couldn’t afford to let her finish. This should have set warning bells off. When we talked more she worked at the market picking up work here and there so not working
regularly and came from a very large family. Everything pointed at money and she even used the oldest line in the book, “My father is ill and I need money for his medication” which yes, I fell for.

Do I blame her? Nope she is trying to provide for her family and help herself out of poverty, but the thing I did learn is that the only way to meet a good honest person is to be introduced by a family member. This lesson has helped me to where I am now.

I am about to leave England to go visit a good Thai lady who has never been near a bar in her life. She works as a nurse and went to university to study. The age range between us is only 10 years so relatively close in terms of the age gap. How did I
meet her you ask. Well it took a long time, a lot of dedication and patience and it certainly wasn’t online. Plus Thai women love to match make when they can so that helped a lot.

It started a year ago with a meal in a local Thai restaurant in my city. The Thai family that owned this restaurant were friendly, happy and polite. The food was so good and I received a discount so I became a regular going in once a week to eat. As I
was a single man they were friendly but at an arm’s length just in case.

Fast forward a year and the friendship has strengthened immeasurably. I have been invited to their family meals and celebrations, they have taken me to see the monks in my city and introduced me to a lot of other Thai people. This Thai family has met
my parents and sister and we have all sat down and eaten together. I am always friendly, polite, smile and love to laugh and this has helped a lot. They have helped me and I have helped them.

They are good Buddhists that don’t drink, don’t smoke or gamble and I and my family are Christians that are the same. From the discussions I have had with the Thai family the two religions are not that different. Please don’t think
I am suggesting that many guys do this just to date a Thai woman, it's just the way things worked out.

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The day in question was Febuary 14th and I was eating in the restaurant alone, when the wife asked why did I not have date. I replied I would like a date but in my city all the single women are taken, well the decent ones are anyway, and the odds are
not good where I live.

Little did I know that from this night the cogs were turning in the Thai family's mind. The wife found me a single member of her family and introduced us to each other. Now I know this is not a scam as due to the friendship developed over a year
between everybody. Of course the thought crossed my mind whether this is genuine or just to get their niece into the UK, which is why I took my time and didn’t rush anything. What is the saying? Buyer beware and if something is to good
to be true, it is.

This Thai family must have thought highly of me to introduce me to their educated, single niece who has not had a boyfriend before. I never planned for any of this to happen and was hell bent on finding a Filipina to date, but things just seem to have
fallen into place.

My first visit to Thailand was at the beginning of September and I could only spend 3 days with her as she switched jobs from different hospitals. She came and met me at the airport and I know from speaking and meeting her aunty who is married to an Englishman
in a nearby city that she was scared silly to meet a foreigner. Her English was okay once she got over the nerves, but I did have to speak slowly for her to understand. The fact that on the first taxi from the airport to my hotel she paid for
the toll way surprised me, and I offered her the money in compensation but she said she did not want it.

When she came to meet me, she dressed conservatively with jeans down to her ankles and a long sleeved top with not a hint of makeup. That first night we went for something to eat and the sights and smells of Thailand blew me away as it was my very first
trip. We went for some local food and then she told me she was going back to where she stayed so I gave her the cab fare home.

Over the next 3 days we did a lot of things together, trips out, talking and I treated her with respect and the manners I would a woman back in my country. The dates were fun. I paid for the big things and she paid for the small things like entrances
to a temple of 50 baht.She always said thank you for anything, be it lunch and dinner which I bought happily and never asked for anything.

On the last day she gave me a nickname, and sitting in the back of the taxi she held my hand and wouldn’t let go, obviously out of sight of the taxi driver as no doubt he would have had a word or two to say about it.

Fast forward to where we are now and I am going back to see her for 2 weeks. She is looking forward to seeing me and has made plans for us already. I have been given the privilege of being allowed to stay in my Thai family's Mum's house or in
this young lady's family house as she stays at the hospital. She wants me to come and pick her up from work using the family's motorbike. It’s a shame I don’t know how to ride one!

I am excited and nervous. She has told me she will wait for me and that she likes me. Do I think what she feels is genuine? Yes I do, but I do wonder if the cultural gap is too wide. I am open minded and willing to undergo a major idea change to make
this work, but I do have a backbone and if she does something I don’t like then I will say so.

This weekend I am of to the local temple with the Thai family and her Aunty to see the monks and I know the Aunty will be checking me out again to make sure I am still good for her niece.

Where this journey ends up I don’t know but if anybody is interested I will keep my story going.

Stickman's thoughts:

Good luck and I hope the trip goes well. Do let us know how things progress.

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